I'd like to take this opportunity to welcome all newscasters, anchorpersons, pundits, researchers and other practitioners of The News.
In the last few days of Obama appointments, reading Daily Kos has become the traditional media's litmus test to find out what liberals are thinking in Center-Right AmericaTM, and to find out exactly how much of a problem we're going to cause.
One thing's for sure, men and women of The News - Daily Kos is the only place you could possibly find out.
Because you see, we liberals are not to be found on streets, in offices, in homes or in the shopping malls of Center-Right AmericaTM. If we were then your reporters would spot us a mile off, with our beaded pubic hair, recycled Volvos, comfortable t-shirts and "Save The Whale" shoes; with the fact that we are all in our late sixties (you know, the "real" sixties) and perfumed with a sharp blend of patchouli, pot and accidental pee; or perhaps simply because we are constantly fornicating with whoever we can lay our hands on.
No, you have correctly deduced that in Center-Right AmericaTM liberals have been reduced to a rump of hardcore crazies, a gang of paranoid fantasists who dare not show their face in public. Instead, we are fated to meet in lonely corners of the internet like this, where we create our own safe havens, where our hearts can bleed in peace.
Daily Kos is not a site for mainstream opinion. It's not a site for ordinary Americans. Stay away, if you value your values.
Cut adrift and isolated, we are an extremist minority swimming against the tide.
Universal health care, ending the war in Iraq, ending torture, closing Guantanamo, rebuilding the middle classes, education for all, energy independence and the green revolution: all of these are fringe radical ideas that all decent, God-fearing Center-Right AmericansTM find abhorrent. In sweeping Barack Obama to power, the electorate of Center-Right AmericaTM gave a crushing rejection to our liberal agenda.
So, men and women of The News, you are right when you say that Obama's "problem" is how to deal with people like us. Because in a Center-Right nation, we are nothing but an embarrassment for the Democratic President-Elect. With only 53% of the popular vote and a mere 68% of the electoral college vote on our side, the man needs to distance himself from us as much as possible.
And when you report back to the rest of America about the strange and exotic wonders of this mysterious, last bastion of liberalism, be sure to let them know we said hi.
UPDATE: Recent Diary List? I am truly humbled, etc.