A House (no longer) divided

Yesterday, this political junkie cried.  This seen-it-all, hardened amateur political strategist welled up again, full of something I’ve never felt before a primary election...hope and enthusiasm, respect and optimism, and long abandoned idealism.

The moment that Maria Shriver walked out on the stage at UCLA, I knew it meant something huge. The implications of it are astounding.  The normally shy Caroline, with Michele Obama, the never-before-endorsed Oprah, and Maria Shriver is a picture to be e-mailed around the world.  A picture worth ten thousand words.

Maria stepped out from behind the mask of the politician’s wife.  Without makeup and "done" hair, she leapt on stage and spoke from the heart about doing the right thing, about being urged by her daughter to do it, even if it only meant changing one person’s mind, about how until two hours before, she still wasn’t sure if she would.  About the "moment".  If you haven’t yet seen this uplifting piece of political theater you simply must watch it now:

http://www.youtube.com/...

Oh, to be a fly on the wall at the Schwarzenegger household last night!

Which brings me to my own divided household....

Hubby likes Hillary, I Obama.  Up until this moment, I’m still trying to persuade him to switch.  But, he argues, Hillary has experience. Yeah, I counter, but she also has Bill. But Hubby likes Bill.  I used to like Bill.  He thinks Obama lacks substance.  I feel that he’s connecting to the yearnings of all of us who have been so furious at the Bush administration and politicians who just don’t listen or care about us, the "people".  But. he argues, things were really good during the Clinton years.  But, I think Obama will bring out more voters and has a better chance of winning the general.  Yeah, but he’s always liked Hillary.  But Hillary voted for the war...I can’t forgive, many mothers’ kids died.

We learned years ago in marriage counseling, this is the time to take a break.  Have a cup of tea, listen to some Mozart, take a walk, do a little yoga.  Time out!  (Not that we always act so mature, but at least we try).

One of my favorite sayings is "it’s the same all over".  What’s happening in my household is happening all over America today.  And it’s happening on this site.  One way or another, this is an historic election like no other.  Tomorrow I work the polls...it’s gonna be a long day.  And when it’s over, I hope and pray that we have a clear winner and that on Wednesday morning, after a nice hot cup of collective tea, we all get up and accept the outcome with graciousness, determined to work together regardless of our differences to defeat the beast.

Whoa, UPDATE, news flash.  Hubby just called on the way to work.  He just saw a bumper sticker that says "Got Hope?".  He changed his mind!  (something rare and treasured!).  Are you sure, honey?  Yes, he still loves Hillary, still thinks she deserves the presidency, but the cottage industry of Hillary-Haters will make this such a divisive and bitter election and we cannot afford to lose.  With a conflicted heart he will surrender his mail ballot at the polls tomorrow and vote for Obama.

So there.  I’m kind of conflicted about the whole thing myself.  We have two wonderful candidates and I would dearly love to have a woman president, but the time is right for only one.  

It’s Obama’s moment.

•  Seize the moment!

  by Fury on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:32:09 AM PDT

•  Possibly, Obama people are more

  comfortable with women in a supportive role?  

  I mean, I haven't heard a single claim that any one of these lovely women might be "calculating".   They are saints, cousins of the Virgin herself.   And nicely in their place, a circle of adoring angels around the godhead.

  Sorry, that was mean.  But you do have to wonder why these women are held up as such fabulous role models by the Obamolites here on dkos, while another very accomplished and good-hearted woman with 10x the knowledge and leadership abilities is dragged through the mud by the acolites of the "great uniter".  

  by mrogers2007 on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:36:08 AM PDT

  •  sounds like sour grapes to me mrogers

    I am a woman and worship no one. I have seen them all since JFK worked for Bobby and always voted and supported democrats. I have waited a long time to see some one inspire the youth of this country. The future is about them not us. They have the most to gain and lose. I want them to stay involved and to take their rightful place in leadership. Our generation has sure made a mess of things. I do not want to them to go back and become apathetic and cynical again. I remember what it was to be young and inspired by the likes of JFK. When you get inspired like that you stay involved. That is what I want for my children and grandchildren. So don't you dare attack anyone's motives for supporting their candidate.

    by ronnied on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:48:50 AM PDT

    •  When was the last time a "children's crusade"

      candidate won even the nomination, much less the general election?  Seriously?  

      I understand and recognize the passion of youth.  But what about the wisdom and understanding that comes with life experience?  Just because they are passionate doesn't mean they have a deeper understanding of the issues we face as a nation, a planet, and a people.  

      This is why younger people are more susceptible to being influenced by a wide range of sources.  I see their embrace of Senator Obama as something akin to rock star worship.  Obamamania, if you will.  This is NOT a good thing for our country.

      I mean no disrespect to young people and in no way wish to discourage them from participating in politics.  But I urge them to approach things from a rational perspective and avoid getting caught up in the hype surrounding any candidate or cause.  Look below the surface.  Consider the motivations of those who are trying to influence you and what the long term ramifications for our society are if their vision is realized.

      I would love to be inspired by the possibilities represented by Senator Obama, I really would.  But every time I look past his image and get into the details of his political past, voting history, fundraising, etc. I find things I don't like.  And what I most don't like about them is the underlying political calculation and disingenuity involved.  For example, he claims to be free from lobbyists' money, yet many of his fundraising contacts have been supplied by lobbyists.  A distinction without a real difference.  I don't mind his taking the money from these people.  It is part of how you raise enough cash to be elected.  But please don't claim things that aren't really so.

      by kbman on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 01:00:34 PM PDT

  •  It's Not Agreed That There Is a Woman W 10x the

    leadership abilities in the mix.

    Last time she was near office, the Democrats lost representation at all levels in all parts of the country. If you measure leadership by the results among those being led, it's not entirely inspiring.

    by Gooserock on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:50:54 AM PDT

  •  rec'd to counter alba

    Just because you disagree with someone is no reason to TR them.  There was nothing in this comment that was offensive.  Grow up.

    by kbman on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 12:36:12 PM PDT

  •  Uprated because nothing said

    here is outside the realm of expressing one's opinion.

    by Montague on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 04:10:44 PM PDT

•  Why this was so meaningful to me was the ripping

  off of the mask. She talked about leading her own life, talking to her first time voter daughter about doing what's right.  Even the wife of the governator must do what's right.  I think it was very courageous on Maria's part to do what she did.

  by Fury on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:39:29 AM PDT

•  Sorry

  We have the first seriously qualified woman to stand for the Presidency.   I'm backing her to the end.  Both candidates are very good.   But for mother who raised me as a single parent and for my two daughters who may have to wait a generation for a woman to come this close to leading our country, I will give her my vote.    If this is not her time, then it will not be time for women for a very long time.

  by ActivatedbyBush on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:41:01 AM PDT

  •  One could say the same for African Americans

    I hate that one first has to be pitted against another, but it is.

    by snout on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:48:41 AM PDT

    •  Oprah's comment... we are free women

      was very powerful. She, like myself, is not endorsing a candidate just because of their gender and is not endorsing him because of his race, she's endorsing Obama because he is... brilliant and wise. She said voting based purely on race or gender is insulting and small-minded and I agree 100%.

      by GoracleFan on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:58:22 AM PDT

      •  I don't think many people will be

        voting purely on race or gender.  In fact, those who do will likely be those who are voting AGAINST one or the other because of not wanting a black man or a woman to be president.

        I think, however, that many decent people may be taking it into consideration as part of the gestalt, and I have no problem with that.

        by Montague on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 04:14:01 PM PDT

  •  There are many good women politicians in the

    pipeline.  Outstanding governors and senators.

    If this is not her time, then it will not be time for women for a very long time.

    I'm sorry you believe this.  I am very optimistic about having the opportunity to vote for a woman president after the Obama presidency.

    by Happy Days on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:51:35 AM PDT

  •  Just because she is a woman does not make her the

    most qualified. Her vote on the war alone is enough to disqualify her because she showed poor judgment and did not even read the briefings. That cost lives. I could forgive someone for a vote that might cost money, but going to war is the most important vote that anyone casts. As a former supporter of hers that lost my support for her. I want someone with judgment and brilliance.

    by ronnied on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:52:21 AM PDT

    •  I promised

      in another post that I wouldn't write my case for Clinton, so I will abide by that.  Suffice it to say that I believe that, while both candidates are very good, she is superior.  

      I am not optimistic that there will be a successful woman candidate for President in the next generation.  

      by ActivatedbyBush on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:55:23 AM PDT

    •  That as well was the deciding factor for me.

      As I said above, many mothers' children have died in the "ooops" war.  I simply cannot get over that.  There is no excuse for it.

      by Fury on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:55:33 AM PDT

  •  I understand the desire to stand up for women

    but there are three points I have to make about that:

    1. Obama, like you, was also raised by a single mom and appreciates the sacrifices made by her as do you.

    2. Obama, like you, also has two daughters and wants the very best for them as you do for yours.

    3. Women the world over have endured pain and suffering over the vote to go to war. Women at home have lost husbands, sons, and brothers because of that vote; they have lost months and years in their marriages even when soldiers made it home; female soldiers have lost their lives; thousands upon thousands of Iraqi women have lost their lives, children, and everything else because of this decision to go to war.

    Now, it is one thing to make a mistake and own up to it, but Hillary Clinton will NOT own up to her mistake. This mistake hurt women. I guess maybe I see supporting women a little differently than just having one in the Oval Office, I want someone who is willing to take a stand for what's right & make good judgements, even if it isn't in their best interest politically. Obama stood stong against this war when it was unpopular to do so. Think of the way the lives of the women above would have been drastically altered had Obama gotten his way with the war instead of Hillary getting hers.

    by GoracleFan on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 12:33:58 PM PDT

    •  I hear you

      But a President Obama will not be the same example to my children as a President Clinton.   And to say that Hillary Clinton does not have strong beliefs that she fights for is unfair.  

      For me it is not a choice between voting for the first woman President and voting for the best candidate for President.  I'm getting to do both tomorrow.  

      I mainly chose to comment here because of all of the talk that this is a transformative moment, it is a historic moment.  All true, but I see the more powerful history being made in a Clinton Presidency.

      by ActivatedbyBush on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 12:40:41 PM PDT

      •  I respect your opinion however

        please check out this diary about 100 feminists who came out today in support of Obama.

        It's about more than having a woman in office... any daughter would be proud of a mother who votes to keep her country out of an unnecessary war that hurts hundreds of thousands of women. Just my 2 cents...  :)

        by GoracleFan on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 07:07:01 PM PDT

    •  Hear, hear!

      nothing to add...many people have needlessly died and suffered due to incompetance, pigheadedness, and political posturing.  Despicable.

      by Fury on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 12:49:29 PM PDT

•  And I respect you for your decision

  and I hope on Wednesday we can come together and support whomever is the winner.

  by Fury on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:42:59 AM PDT

  •  This won't be over on Wednesday

    but when it is over, I will be supporting our candidate, whoever it is.   We will have missed an historic opportunity either way, but we need to remove the GOP from power.

    by ActivatedbyBush on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:45:26 AM PDT

    •  On that there is absolutely, positively,

      no disagreement.

      by Fury on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:47:26 AM PDT

•  This Obama supporter is NOT more

  comfortable with women in a supporting role.  Personally, that sounds like a mean-spirited generalization.

  Would you like us to criticize Hillary for playing a supporting role to Bill all of those years?

  She probably could have run for president years earlier if she hadn't fallen in love with him and had carved her own political career much earlier.

  In many ways I would have loved to have seen Hillary as president.

  But Barack is a rare combination of qualities that just happens to be what America needs most at this moment in time.

  by Happy Days on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:46:08 AM PDT

  •  From the Brief Glimpse So Far, I'd Follow Michele

    Obama pretty much anywhere.

    Womankind is not running here, Hillary Clinton.

    And the Presidency is not a pain and suffering award.

    by Gooserock on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:53:08 AM PDT

•  I know my wife was happy that I joined her in

  supporting Obama. Put up a yard sign yesterday, gone this morning (luckily I had a spare, I'll have to take it in tonight). I don't want to be dissappointed, but I really feel this is something special. 2004 saw record turnout in the GE (post 1972), I think 2008 could blow that away. Millions of new voters can 'change the map' as they say.

  by Sacramento Dem on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:46:17 AM PDT

•  Yes a special, historic, once in a lifetime

  moment that one way or another will change the political landscape for good.

  by Fury on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 11:49:55 AM PDT

•  Why do some people bring up gender (or race)?

  I personally don't understand why people bring up gender or race as the rationale why most people are picking Clinton or Obama. I work in a small organization where more than half the employees are women, half the principals are women, three are GLBT (including me -- a gay man, I am also Asian and a principal), three are Asian, one is African American, etc.

  The choice is really an emotional one, about whether we want a "values" president or a "policies" president, an inspirational person or a managerial person. Usually you find that the "values" person within an organization without a glass ceiling is typically a woman, but not always. This year, for the Democrats, that person just happens to be a man.

  I am NOT an Oprah fan, but she spoke yesterday about each person finding their own voice, being their own person, and making their own choice. My choice for president has always been to choose the inspirational candidate over the managerial candidate. If Clinton were that candidate, I would be voting for her. But she isn't. Obama IS that candidate and I just wish we could frame the discussion in that context, because it would make the debate more constructive and less charged.

  by KevinLV on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 12:01:57 PM PDT

  •  Simply to point out my conflict

    As a woman, I would so love to have a woman as president.  Let's give the G team a chance!  I was simply pointing out that while I want a woman president and I do think she's qualified, I am voting Obama for a multitude of other reasons.

    by Fury on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 12:11:37 PM PDT

•  Cautiously hopeful, check your head

  I will be voting for Obama. I so so badly want to believe, but can't completely buy into the "hope" message.  Nagging doubts still fill my head about what he will actually accomplish in the White House.  And the completely emotional pull that so many feel worries me greatly.  NOT TO SAY THAT THEY ARE THE SAME IN ANY WAY, but the response people have to Obama bears comparison to the support Hitler garnered.  Be careful of voting based only on your emotions.  There are other reasons he is the better candidate.

  (No doubt this will get me troll rated. So be it.)

  by smellybeast on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 12:19:37 PM PDT