Why Conservatives Should Love Illegal Immigrants

(promoted from comments)

Leaving aside the fact that historically probably 90% of all our ancestors were illegal immigrants (even my ancestors who came over on the Mayflower were violating the King's charter, which allowed them to settle only in Virginia), here's why Conservatives should LOVE illegal immigrants.

They're the embodiments of entrepreneurial capitalism, family values, respect for authority, fiscal responsibility, and devotion to the military. Details on the flip.

(1) Social Darwinism / entrepreneurial free enterprise at its best. These folks have showed initiative, cunning, and ingenuity in getting into the country in the first place, figuring out how to get around the rules and regulations concerning their livelihood, and carving out a niche for themselves. Unlike their lazy and dumb counterparts who stayed at home. Why, it's the enterpreneurial spirit, in retail. They're the cream of the crop of their native lands, and we only want the best in the U S of A.

(2) Family Values. By far the vast majority of illegal immigrants come to this country to care for their families, and virtually all of them come from deeply conservative religious traditions.

(3) Fearful respect for authority. While  most of us live our lives with the delusion of having rights and liberties which are inalienable, illegal immigrants know that if they're caught spitting on the sidewalk they may be deported. This creates an incredibly law-abiding populace. My Aunt in San Diego calls the right-hand lane of the I-5, where traffic crawls along at a lawful 55 at all times, the "illegales lane" because nobody wants to get caught in a routine traffic stop and find themselves heading back to Sonora.

(4) Cost-free support of massive federal spending. Contrary to popular belief, illegal immigrants don't drain social resources such as welfare and public assistance programs. With fake documents to get jobs, most illegals end up contributing payroll taxes, and some income taxes, for which they will never collect retirement or other benefits. (This is not a joke, just yesterday they readjusted the timeline for Social Security Trust Fund solvency based on calculating the contributions of immigrants who will never cash out benefits.) Given our deficits, it would be far more fiscally responsible to invite even more illegales in.

(5) Support for our armed forces. The fastest-growing demographic enlisting in our armed forces are non-citizens. If we're going to have enough cannon fodder for further foreign adventures without a liberty-depriving draft, what better way than to continue to rely on the patriotism and love of country of foreign-born illegal immigrants who have come for the opportunity and stayed for the adventure of a lifetime.

Tell me, where else are you going to find conservative values in such density except among the illegal immigrant population?

•  Tips for the kitchen staff?

  by TheCrank on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:32:31 AM PDT

•  Please Recommend this diary, maybe Lou Dobbs will

  read it and learn.

  by TheCrank on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:33:27 AM PDT

•  That brown skin ...

  You can't really expect wingnuts to love people with dark skin.  It's just so, so, so .... UnAmerican!

  Exploit?  Yes.  

  Love?  Never.

  by martydd on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:35:08 AM PDT

•  exactly

  These are the best citizens a country can dream of, especially an aging one which will need a steady source of young labor to support the retired baby boomer generation. They are also by and large religious, family values oriented, the way 50s era Americans used to be. Everytime I drive around LA and see how much the immigrants add to this city, it baffles me how anybody who has any experience with the reality can be opposed to this great boon. Not to mention that my job and many others in this town are dependent on the steady stream of consumers, who have to buy everything from scratch, coming in over the border.  

  by Marcion on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:37:34 AM PDT

  •  in all seriousness, the fear is coming...

    ...from parts of the country with very few immigrants, albeit where it's growing. I think it's the generic fear of the unknown, the other, and the human need (sad to say) to have a handy scapegoat when something bad happens.

    by TheCrank on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:39:36 AM PDT

    •  To be fair,

      I do think there are a number of areas that have gone from no immigrants or racial/ethnic/linguistic diversity to a fairly large number of immigrants in a very short period of time.

      I'm not excusing bigotry or xenophobia by any stretch, but when a social change that large occurs quickly, it's not that surprising that there are tensions.

      by SadTexan on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:48:53 AM PDT

    •  not exactly true

      South of us in San Diego, all the crew cut people loathe the illegals. There are so many towns down there are that are basically Mexican towns, not to mention the barrios, but they are all segregated. The white people down there are working on apartheid as fast as they can. It's amazing how different two neighboring cities can be, and they will get a totally diferent atmosphere through their efforts, no doubt.

      by Marcion on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:49:20 AM PDT

      •  Tell more.

        Who are the "crew cut people"?

        Here in Texas, while there are certainly exceptions, even a lot of the Anglo moneyed crowd has been around Spanish speakers all their lives, and is generally not hysterical.

        by SadTexan on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:51:38 AM PDT

        •  the military folk

          There's a large military and retired military Republican contingent, who make it a point to have crew cuts to differentiate themselves from the "hippies."

          by Marcion on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:53:56 AM PDT

•  A lot of Republicans

  (of the business persuasion) are well aware of all these points and don't like the anti-immigrant hysteria one bit.  

  Lots of farmers here in Texas (not to stereotype, but your average Texas small farmer isn't exactly a lefty) know they couldn't survive without cheap immigrant labor.

  Not the most noble of justifications, but I have about stopped worrying about people's motives.

  by SadTexan on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:38:34 AM PDT

  •  its hitting them hard

    All this anti-immigration hysteria is hitting the farmers.

    http://ap.google.com/...

    http://www.thedailygreen.com/...

    http://www.zwire.com/...

    by freespeech on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:42:15 AM PDT

•  OR undoc. imm. in dollars and cents

  This refers to #4 on your list. The Oregon Center for Public Policy published this paper on what undocumented workers either cost or contribute to their state's coffers. (Spoiler: they contribute.)

  Even Arnold Schwarzenegger in CA said the other day that undocumented workers are not responsible for the state of the economy in CA.

  by DorothyT on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:40:22 AM PDT

•  The number one reason to love illegal immigrants

  Cheap, union-busting labor.

  That is why they tolerate it - how else would the crops be picked, the dishes bussed, the kids nannied, the offices cleaned?

  As with most things 'conservative', follow the money.

  by Ammo Hauler on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:41:11 AM PDT

•  What strikes me about the immigration debate

  is that for the rightwingers, it's not generally about economics.  (Reasonable people can disagree about the economic consequences of illegal immigration.)

  It's about "culture" in one form or another.  Often about language.  In other words, it's xenophobia.

  by SadTexan on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:46:19 AM PDT

•  Conservatives do love them

  because they can exploit them in the workplace for monetary gain.

  by dawnt on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:46:56 AM PDT

•  As a conservative

  The problem isn't that we are afraid of brown people, as some here suggest.

  - Illegals contribute to already overtaxed schools and hospitals in our nations fastest growing areas.

  - Mexico is a socialist country, and as such as a far different view of how active the government should be in their lives.  (I'd also be opposed to mass immigration from Canada for the same reason).

  - There is a growing, but still small contingent of Hispanics who think the Southwest should be returned to Mexico.  If that area becomes heavily populated by Mexicans, is that more or less likely to happen?  Not immediately, or even in any of our life times, but what about in 150 years?  They do have a historical claim, and Alcase-Lorrain was given back to France after 50-75 years of German control.

  But, my bottom line is this - I will be happy to legalize in some form the illegals ALREADY HERE - but only after the border is secure.

  by headhunt23 on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:54:23 AM PDT

  •  Um Alsace wasn't exactly GIVEN back

    There were three wars that decided the fate of Alsace-Lorraine. (Bear in mind the ethnic history of the 'Franks' - picking a sovereign nation for some of these border areas wasn't just a matter of doing a headcount.)

    Among my own immigrant forebearers were Germans from Alsace who couldn't stand German rule after '71.

    by TheCrank on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:59:10 AM PDT

    •  I think

      it was given back as part of the Treaty of Versialles following WWI...of course "given back" may be putting a happy face on it.

      by headhunt23 on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 12:01:56 PM PDT

  •  Say what?

    Mexico is a socialist country, and as such as a far different view of how active the government should be in their lives.

    No offense, and I would like to take this opportunity to welcome a conservative to the debate, but that's just not true.

    The influence of the state in the life of the average Mexican is pretty minimal.  Yes, there is some government health care, etc.  But by and large, the only real safety net for most Mexicans is the family.

    by SadTexan on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 12:00:04 PM PDT

    •  The Enron Of The South

      The Mexican government's corrupt Pemex monopoly is the only entity allowed to sell and drill for oil in Mexico.

      I think that oil is still a bigger source of revenue for Mexico than tourism and remittances from Mexicans living in the US?

      I'm too lazy to check.

      by Utahrd on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 12:05:52 PM PDT

      •  Pemex is actually losing money right now

        The Mexican government is moving (sloooowly) at getting private investment (from the US) to retool the infrastructure.

        by TheCrank on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 12:08:27 PM PDT

  •  PS I don't disagree with you about the border

    I'd like to see a healthy border security policy, but ultimately it seems to me like the best solution for the Mexican migration problem is a developed Mexican economy.

    Of course, "securing the borders" in the literal sense of our southern border does nothing about the non-Mexican illegals who come via other means -- the emphasis on border security is a bit misplaced in that sense.

    That said, not controlling our own labor market while allowing unrestricted imports is a losing economic strategy, in that it devalues our own labor. This has always been my free market objection to the mix of migration and trade policies we have. Having sensible restrictions on both with a general spirit of free markets is a better approach than what we have now.

    by TheCrank on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 12:03:10 PM PDT

    •  The other side

      is that I would prefer that we allow in MORE immigrants, when they have skills, such as doctors.  

      The lunacy with our immigration policy, the way it is actually practiced, is that we allow folks to come in and compete at the bottom of the compensation ladder, but we maintain all kinds of controls on certain specialties where we have sever shortages.  We could have our pick of the worlds brains, but we just allow the folks with strong backs and nerve in.  (not that those aren't attributes we can use).

      We could let in imported doctors, send them to small towns with out doctors for 7 years while they earn their citizen ship, and then license them to work anywhere.

      by headhunt23 on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 12:10:09 PM PDT

•  Not exactly true

  Cost-free support of massive federal spending. Contrary to popular belief, illegal immigrants don't drain social resources such as welfare and public assistance programs. With fake documents to get jobs, most illegals end up contributing payroll taxes, and some income taxes, for which they will never collect retirement or other benefits. (This is not a joke, just yesterday they readjusted the timeline for Social Security Trust Fund solvency based on calculating the contributions of immigrants who will never cash out benefits.) Given our deficits, it would be far more fiscally responsible to invite even more illegales in.

  Actually, if we were to normalize their status, i.e. grant amnesty of some sort they would be collecting that Social Security and other benefits.  I know this for a fact.  When RayGun granted amnesty last time, my boyfriend's entire job was fixing SSNs of formerly illegal workers so that it could calculate Unemployment, Social Security, etc.

  He said the job was a nightmare as some SSNs had a dozen different people working under them and separating them out was awful.

  by Sychotic1 on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 12:01:11 PM PDT

  •  that's why you keep them ILLEGAL n/t

    by TheCrank on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 12:04:38 PM PDT

•  Conservatives DO love illegal immigrants.

  Cheap and exploitable labor. They love nothing better. That's why they're always being caught employing them.

  by Kagro X on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 12:07:03 PM PDT

  •  That is rubbish

    Big Business that control the Republican party love immigrants. The average conservative such as myself would prefer an ORDERLY immigration policy instead of  chaos asshole Bush ignores to please his Big Business Masters.  

    by Vengeur on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 01:06:25 PM PDT

    •  Yes, yes.

      All rubbish, I'm sure. Tut tut and all that.

      Curb your dogs, sir.

      by Kagro X on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 03:05:19 PM PDT

      •  You really put some thought into that, eh?

        by Vengeur on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 03:18:38 PM PDT

        •  You flatter yourself...

          to think you deserve more.

          Own up to your failure to control your ranks, and you may one day merit more attention.

          by Kagro X on Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 08:35:37 PM PDT