A Washingtonian offers his suggestions on how to enjoy Inauguration Day - elsewhere.
A couple months ago, I put up a diary that discussed the pros and cons of attending the Inauguration and how to make the most of attending it here in DC. I now repudiate that diary in favor of a "don't come" message, period.
Here are a few points.
1.) If you believe, as I do, that Obama's Inauguration is a victory for the entire nation, it stands to reason that the entire nation is a proper place to celebrate it. It will be the most widely televised non-news event in history; it is spectacle but not "news" in the same way that the annual ball dropping at Times Square for New Year's Eve is a spectacle, but not news. Accordingly, you can see this event televised live essentially everywhere except Joe the Plumber's [sic] den.
2.) Washington is often cold and wet in mid-January. I live here and got hailed on, then rained on today. We get sleet, snow, slush, freezing rain. It's chilly and damp and clammy. You want nine hours of this?
3.) Toilets. Yes, you will drink coffee to stay warm, and at some point you will want a toilet. No, you cannot use mine; I am five miles from Pennsylvania Avenue and I will be leaving DC to escape the madness. (No, the apartment is not available for sublet.) The National Mall may become the National Inaugural Open Toilet. You laugh? How much coffee can 2-4 million liberal activists and tourists excrete per minute? Please, go to Sunny's Surplus and get one of those inside-your-pants piss cans that hikers and adventure sports enthusiasts use, if you insist on coming.
4.) Parking. Forget it. You won't even be able to drive a car into DC from Virginia on any bridge - ANY bridge - on O-Day. Lots of streets are being given over to bus parking, to the consternation of us locals, and a very large perimeter downtown will be closed to vehicles except for transit buses and taxis and the like. I could go on and on about the measures being taken, such as shutting down a major expressway tunnel and turning into a pedestrian walkway.
5.) Transit. Metrorail will be an utter nightmare. Part of the problem is that the station platforms are not very deep, particularly at Gallery Place, a major transit interchange and one of the closer stops to Penn Avenue. Metro is warning people not to hold any expectation of transferring from one train to another; the crowds will prohibit changing trains. Plus errors by tourists, many of them sleepy, hungover or exhausted, will cause major problems. Metro is advising people to get on as far away from downtown as possible and to disembark as early as you can on the line, and to get ready to WALK. There are additional bus lines being run to relieve the rail but most tourists won't feel comfortable handling them and they will likely be a major nightmare as well.
6.) Lunch/Dinner. Bring food and drink with you. Do not expect Uno's to seat you. Forget my prior advice about places to go.
Okay, I have been a total downer here. A lot of us locals are frightened about what will happen. I will be getting a train to New York early on the 19th to avoid the crowds (that's right - Manhattan as bucolic sanctuary) and returning very early on the 21st. I hope to see the Inauguration happen at the home of my uncle in the Bronx. For those who want to celebrate the Inauguration at home, or at a city with greater capacity for tourism and maybe a little more in need of tourist dollars, here are some ideas.
a. Any city in Ohio and Pennsylvania. They can use the cash.
b. Baltimore. If you want to tour DC, I suggest doing it on the 21st, and spending the 20th in Baltimore, a poorer city but one with a lot of interesting things to see and do - only 40 miles from DC. Plus, you can take the MARC commuter rail down on the 21st which you basically cannot do now on the 20th. I suggest Fell's Point and Little Italy (specifically Velleggia's.) Baltimore is as cold and sloppy as DC, but will be far less crowded and far cheaper.
c. Florida. Yes - make the "lesser schlep", go see Bubbe or Abuelita, and you won't freeze your ass off.
d. Stay home and make a blue pizza. Better - throw a party to make pizzas that look like the "O" symbol.
If you have to work here, or you already bought your tickets, so be it. But please don't make a last-minute decision to enter this logistical trainwreck just for the par-tay. Thanks for reading one local's opinion.