It seems to me that one of the memes coming out of this election season that is likely to stick is that of the "real American." It shows up everywhere.
Everywhere except New York, Massachusetts, Vermont, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Washington D.C., and (despite its prop-8 vote) California, that is.
Therefore, in honor of tonight's debut of the spectacularly popular and newly refinished American Idol, I propose a new "real"ity show, one inspired by and respectful of that newly found and popularized American, teh "real" American.
Let's play...Real American Idol!
In the new version of the pop-culture hit, American citizens who don't know as much as a 5th grader will compete to be considered founts of folkloric wisdom and deep insight by other real Americans who prefer it that way.
Contestants will aspire to follow in the footsteps of previous Real American Idol winners George W. Bush and Ronald Reagan, and recent much beloved runners-up John McCain and Sarah Palin.
Auditions will be held in Lake Forest, CA (at the Saddleback Family Church Refinerybuilding), Pigeon Forge, TN (in Dollywood's Smoky Mountain Home), and on the steps of the Branson, MO Chamber of Commerce.
Contestants need only convince a panel of expert judges of "realness" that they are the real Real American Idol. Really!
This year's returning justices, er, judges, are fan favorites Sarah Palin (once she got a taste of the show, we just haven't been able to get rid of her! Bless 'er heart!), Larry teh Cable Guy, and Jeff Foxworthy. New this season we'll be adding that phenom-of-realness: Joe the Non-correspondent! It doesn't get any more real America than that, folks!
Yes, it is an all comedian panel this year...
So, sign up early and often at the audition site of your choice, and you can be the next contestant on...Real American Idol!