Not long ago I received a mailing asking me how the economy had hurt my family. I put the email away until I could find the right time to tell my story. My story is one that affects a family as a whole; Mothers, daughters, sons, grandparents. At the time I was dealing with my feelings and they had run amuck. The deep sadness I felt was so over powering that finding words was just not possible. Today the words are there.
My daughter Jenn and my son-in-law Cal are are in their early thirties. Just over a year ago they both were working at good jobs; her in medical billing and he as a driver for Coke. They had savings in the bank that allowed them to live a good life. Their 4 lil girls were as average as any kid can be. They had started to buy a home and looked forward to a future with kids playing in the yard, a place to call their own..
One day all that changed. In a manner of moments the future they looked forward to ended. Cal was diagnosed with not just 1 cancer (non hodgkins lymphoma), but 2 different types (Renall Cell Carcinoma ). The dreams they had died that day. The house could be no longer. The money was needed for chemo and meds and,and, and... Even though they have insurance the co pays and the deductibles little by little took away all they had. My husband and I voluntarily took up payment of Cal's insurance. We did not want him worrying about that. We could handle it. We tried to make it down to see the kids as often as we could. Cal went through the chemo like a trooper. Afterwards he caught pneumonia and had to be hospitalized. They did all they could for him and got him well enough to do the surgery for the renal cell carcinoma. They eventually went in and took out as much as much as they could. He was still feeling a lot of pain so they sent him to a specialist. He told them that the renal cell was stage IV and that he could have as much as 5-8 years to live. Maybe....
Jenn's sister, Cal's family and their friends have done all they could to help keep Cal's chin up. Some members that she counted on left her. Her dad (my ex) made the decision to walk away from Cal and Jenn during this horrid time in their life. (I guess some folks do not understand what love is truly all about...) Jenn amazes me. If I could put any woman up for Mother of the Year it would be her. She worked 40 hours a week, took care of Cal and the kids and on a rare occasion got 5 minutes to herself -most nights after 2 am. She has never given up and she has fought the hard fight like I have never seen a woman do. When Cal underwent chemo she was there with him, holding his hand and watching him sleep. When the kids needed "mom time" she was there once again.. When work needed her she again was there...
Cal and Jenn have been keeping a blog over at CaringBridge - a site for people with critical illnesses. Over the weekend Jenn made a new entry. I want to share part of it with you:
"How do you get over the anger? How do you not get angry when everyone around you is getting to live their lives freely without limitation? How do you not get angry when you hear that those around you get to go here and there without worry? How in the world are you not angry?"
I will fight to give Cal and Jenn the things they want. I will do whatever I can and use whatever means possible to make their dreams come true...
My last statement is to Senator McCain and all the other GOP Senators out there. You forgot people like Jenn and Cal. You were and are not interested in them. As long as you obstruct and do not look out for the Jenn and Cal's of this world you will never be in power. We are tired of hearing you whine and have tantrums when YOU in fact have forgotten who is America. President Obama is trying to make Americans empowered and you and the other GOPers want to make it about you. You have forgotten - or maybe you just do not care - what real generational theft is. You and the rest of the GOP that sit in Washington just don't care. Over and over again you have shown us that you don't care about our veterans, you don't care about jobs, you don't care about those that are homeless, you don't care about foreclosures. Wake up Senator! Wake the hell up! Someone once told me you are a leader. When are you going to start being one?
UPDATE: Thank you all for the kind words. The reason I wrote this blog is a reminder to the people out there who say we don't need healthcare. 4 days of hospital care cost $96000.00 Even with the insurance they have bankruptcy is banging at their door. The GOP has shown absolutely no concern for Cal and jenn and the others like them. I target Senator McCain because his mug is the one I see on the TV every time I turn around. Senator Boehner and the rest are in lock step with him.