When I was a youth, I had a full head of shoulder length blond hair, I was fit (played a lot of soccer) and I had lightening reflexes. I still hold the the local town record for high score on Stargate a video game with 8 control buttons/actions. When I got my first job with a big company during University, I astounded the company nurse with my physical abilities. On eyesight, I was able to see every letter/number/word/object that they tested me with...the first ever perfect score. My lung capacity was nearly 6 liters which was off scale for my size and my charm/innocence wooed her too.
Here I sit many years later, mostly bald, iffy lungs, early arthritis, a noticeable paunch, had to get reading glasses this year and I have a recurring peri-anal abscess/fistula that has been surgically drained about 6 times including 2 fistula removal attempts.....neither successful.
More on the flip:
This brings me to remember one of the first pieces of humor I ever read on the internet, and one that to this day makes me Laugh Oout Loud when I read it.
Do not follow this link unless you are prepared to laugh with physical humility. You might even have an asthma attack if you read this. In rare cases stroke or aneurism are possible. Thus warned, I invite you to read:
My Anal Fissure Bob by Joe Cidoni.
Having read DrSteveB's diaries polling the demographics of this web site I came to realize that I'm younger than the average reader/writer here. If I have these troubles, surely I can find others with worse ailments to make me feel better about myself.
This story was posted to alt.tasteless on usenet beginning in 1993 and was, in hindsight, one of the funniest personal health drama's ever written. Since he posted his personal war diary, he did provide some follow up story with a doctor who had a web site discussing anal fissures:
www.boardsailor.com/jack/af
Nice to know he survived his VAD ;-)
Damn, I love toilet humor! This is one of my failings as an adult. I hate to admit it but I taught my 3 year old and my nephews how to make fart noises with with a wet hand and the back part of their knee joint. Yes I am one of those uncles/dad's.
My own decrepitude notwithstanding (is that Lawyer speak?). I'd love to hear what ail's you physically. Don't be shy, I want to hear the nasty stuff, the stuff you only share with your mom/brother/sister/caregiver. We all have our issues be they physical or mental.
I feel lucky that I never licked a frozen metal pole as a child midwinter. Information can be useful, share with me.