When I started college, I was a history major, but I dropped out; it was just too hard. Now I know why: my professors were all LYING IDIOTS!!! They told me a bunch of bunk about the Great Depression and the 1970s, b ut thanks to my new mentor, Professor Michelle Bachmann R-MN, I am now able to realize how much garbage those other teachers tried to poison my fertile young mind with. I failed my US History mid-terms with those liberal propagandists, but I can see the truth. I supposedly got these wrong before, but now I know the answer to these three questions thanks to Professor Bachmann:
- The Coolidge Administration's focus on free market economics and de-regulation of the financial & credit markets lead to:
A. An unprecedented growth in personal consumer debt and margin trading accounts, ultimately leading to a major financial crash in 1929
B. The continuation of the Harding Administration's laissez-faire approach to corruption in financial deals between large brokerages that helped exacerbate the '29 crash's impact
C. Massive greed that created a failure to heed warnings that personal consumer credit balances were precariously high and threatening to the economy's stability
D. All of the above
E. None of the above
F. Answer E, and the greatest era in American economic history that only ended when FDR came into office
CORRECT ANSWER: F!!!!!!
- Who was the only first-term elected President in history to take office in the same year in which he was elected?
A. Benjamin Franklin
B. Alexander Hamilton
C. Salmon P. Chase
D. Presidents never serve in the year they are elected...they are sworn into office on January 20th of the following year (and March 4th up until 1936)
E. None of the above
F. Answer E, and Jimmy Carter, in 1976, when the disturbing correlation between his administration's existence and a Swine Flu epidemic disturbed me
CORRECT ANSWER: F!!!!!!
- What was the Hoot-Smalley Act?
A. The act that prohibited Indonesian deer from voting in US elections
B. That one thing that one time that saved those Spotted Owls
C. The law that made it a crime to not give a hoot and pollute
D. A borderline insane Minnesota Congresswoman's non sequitur re: the Smoot-Hawley tariff passed during the Hoover Administration that many feel lengthened the Great Depression
E. None of the above
F. Answer E, and FDR's great mistake that caused the Great Coolidge Era to end and created the Great Depression that was all that Mt. Rushmore guy's fault!!! It disturbs me that he was also a Democrat
CORRECT ANSWER: F!!!!!
I guarantee you...the answer is F on all these and so does Professor Bachmann. F is also the grade you'll get in any history class besides those taught by Professor Bachmann, so make sure to take her classes and get the real story of history that isn't boring or liberal!