This is my first foray into Chronic Tonic. I have several chronic conditions including: Diabetes, Mental illness and joint problems. I want to focus on diabetes today as it has the potential to do the most long term damage to ones life.
For those who do not know there are two types of diabetes. There are those whose bodies never produce insulin. This is type one or juvenile diabetes. People with Type 1 are always on insulin. Then there is type 2. also known as adult onset. Many people with this type can control it with diet and exercise. Many others by taking pills. I have learned that most type 2 diabetics end up on insulin as they get older. This is the type I have. Risk factors include Native American, Hispanic, African or Asian Heritage. This is because our bodies are not set up for the modern, Euro-American diet. Other risk factor include family history of type 2 diabetes, weight problems, female problems, etc.
In the spring of 1995 my older sister called me crying one day. She was calling to give me the news that she had been diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. At the time I was 29 years old and knew nothing about diabetes. My sister cried when she told me her doctor was going to make her stop drinking, but she never bothered to tell me that I might have it. I really had no Idea. Lucky for me the university I was attending at that time had a diabetes awareness week. I wandered by and saw the sign and thought of my sister and went in. That is how I found out.
I started getting treatment at the student health center. I was uninsured and a single mother at the time. I learned about diet and exercise. I started trying to eat better and to exercise more. At least when I was mentally healthy. I went on the pills and tested my blood sugar and almost never had good control.
After I quit college and went to work I sometimes had insurance and sometimes did not. Even when I had insurance I could not cover the meds and costs all the time. I was an on again off again diabetic. I was always diabetic, I just was not always able to take care of it. I would eat right and exercise religiously when mentally okay and then have an episode and not take care of myself. Then the pain and the complications began.
The first side effect I felt were infections. You see the bacteria in your body live off the sugar in your blood just like you do. When your blood sugar is high they are eating well and reproducing. First, I had recurrent yeast infections.
Then, I started to get recurrent kidney infections. At first they weren't too bad. They got much, much worse over time. Eventually I was repeatedly hospitalized with them about five times. I start out feeling like I've caught the flu. It quickly progresses to extreme pain in the kidneys. Vomiting so hard that I break blood vessels in my stomach and esophogus and then vomiting blood for several days. My stomach is a mess for about a month afterward. It really feels like I have swallowed a big chunk of tough leather in there. I am also week as a kitten for nearly a month afterward.
Then I developed calcium deposits in my shoulders. It is called Calcific Tendonitis and is incredibly painful. I foolishly stopped using my arms because of the pain. In the end it was difficult to feed myself and I would have to stop and rest while combing my hair. Fortunately at the time the local hospital gave me some free medical care. They even gave me physical therapy for my shoulders! The physical therapist was great and broke up my calcium deposits with ultrasound. I learned a very valuable lesson then too. I have developed other joint problems over the years since and have kept moving through the pain and not lost much mobility. If you ever begin to have joint problems, do not stop using your joints! Keeping moving will go a long way to controlling pain.
I would like to stop here and give props to Peacehealth Medicine in Oregon. they have done about $100,000 in care for me over the years and kept me alive without ever seeing a penny. I never noticed any difference in the care I got as opposed to the care that paying customers got either.
Another side effect is depression. As I said many times before I am mentally ill. Bipolar, PTSD, Personality disorder. I have been hospitalized in the mental ward at least 5 times since becoming diabetic. The diabetes contributes to the depression I get from the bipolar. The chronic pain fro the side effects and other medical problems really does a number on my mental problems. I am now experiencing PTSD response around being sick/hospitalized.
The most recent side effect I have had is Ketoacidosis. This was last May. I thought I had a kidney infection. I hurt all over and was throwing up blood after only a couple of hours. My partner came over and walked me to the hospital(I lived about two blocks away). I did not have the worst kidney infection in my life. I had a blood glucose of almost 500 and my body was shutting down. The doctor said if my partner had not taken me in I would have either ended up in a coma or dead.
That was when I first went on insulin. The doctor said I would most likely always be on insulin. They hooked me up with a starter kit and showed me how to inject. I was in the hospital 5 days that time and they let me practice injecting every day. After I got out I applied for the oregon health plan for the millionth time and was again rejected even though I could be considered to have a life threatening condition.
This was when I began cruising the social service agencies. I had gone to certain agencies over the years for help. Now I was there every week trying to find some way to get the $150 in insulin, syringes, test strips, etc. I went to St Vinnies and got a voucher for insulin. I went to Catholic Community Services to get a voucher for needles. I went to the salvation army to get a prescription filled. i spent several months going from agency to agency. At this times I had finally started getting SSDI, but was paying more than half my income for the crappy studio apartment I lived in and could not keep up with the cost of diabetes and other problems. And, while that state was willing to pay all the costs of my gong to the county mental health services and was willing to pay several hundred dollars a month for my psychiatric meds to keep me from killing myself, they were not willing to pay a dime to keep me from dying fro diabetes.
After a few months I had a psychiatric episode and gave up my monthly round of visits to social service agencies. I still tried to take care of myself with diet and exercise but did not go back on insulin until my medicare came through.
Some time in late july I will write another diary about the transition to having medical care and getting treatment for my diabetes.
Now I would like to make my personal argument for universal healthcare. In America we are only entitled to the medical care we can afford. If one is uninsured or underinsured one is then shit out of luck. If one's medical bills exceed what the insurance company is willing to pay(I learned this when my well insured mother was dying) one is still shit out of luck. If ones medical bill exceed the million dollar lifetime maximum payout one is also shit out of luck. Sure we have a social safety net. There are gaping holes in it and it is set so low that you will hit the ground with the same force as if there were no net. The way thing work is like this. The uninsured get sick. They continue to get sick. The first place you go is the Government. You think"I paid my taxes all these years. I paid them so that Social Security would be there if I need it." Sure you did but that will not help. Unless you suddenly go blind you most likely will wait at least two years for SSDI. When you finally qualify for SSDI you will get a lower payment for the first six months. After all just because you lost everything, are seriously ill and lack health insurance doesn't mean you need healthcare of more than $600/month for the first 6 months. As I said you also wait 2 years for medicare no matter what your medical conditions are.
That is the way it works in America for the uninsured or the underinsured. If you get sick, you either get better on your own/with the help of family and charity or you become permanently disabled by your medical problems and then later, after being disabled for a long while, you get help. Or you die. These are the only choices.
How many Americans like myself , who could have stayed in the workforces and been contributing members of our society are instead permanently disabled by a lack of medical care? How many people will live in poverty for the rest of their lives simply because they got sick? How many people are you willing to see on the street and in the morgue? How many people are you willing to support with your tax dollars now they have become permanently disabled die to lack of healthcare? I for one would have much rather stayed working and paying taxes and having a life myself.