Give her a break. Sure she never really expected that Iran would test that one-megaton nuke on Nov. 1, 2008. In fact, she didn't even know Iran was a country. But that's what happened, and then on January 25, 2009, when President John McCain was found wandering aimlessly up Pennsylvania Avenue looking for an old Buick that it turned out he hadn't owned since 1979, and Palin was sworn in the next day on her friend's secret Revised Secessionist Wasilla Assembly of God Bible--well, the entire business would have been stressful for anyone, and she's done pretty well, considering. For instance:
- The Executive Order placing the New York Stock Exchange "in God's receivership," subject to a tithe on every transaction paid to the Wasila Assembly of God, has turned out to be an excellent thing, at least for the Wasilla Assembly of God. Palin said that "she was just an ordinary mom from Wasilla and didn't really get all this complicated Wall Street stuff but she was sure God would take care of it."
- The forty million Iranian casualties resulting from America's ICBM attack on Iran have re-aligned the Mideast in various unforeseen ways. It's true that we now have all the oil we need, on paper, but we can't get to any of it, as the pipelines are destroyed, the ports unusable, and most of the country a glowing radioactive wasteland. To this President Palin has responded that "she is just an ordinary mom from Wasilla and doesn't really get all this international this and that, but that she's sure God will take care of it, if he hasn't already--my gosh, he really wiped 'em out, didn't he?"
- President Palin's "Folded Hands" Health Initiative ("just pray") has been greeted with enormous Republican enthusiasm, along with her statement that she is "just an ordinary mom from Wasilla who doesn't always think these big-talking doctors know as much as they like to let on." "Maybe people get sick for a reason," she told the American Medical Association. "If you think about it, God has a plan for everybody, and anybody who gets sick is obviously part of the plan, so I don't see how a pill or something is going to address whatever insurance, also, may have to pay, creating jobs and making at the same time a difficult situation for doctors such as yourself."
- Fortunately or unfortunately, President Palin resigned abruptly several days later, saying that she was "just an ordinary mom from Wasilla" and that she found her new job "too hard": "You know those really hard boring books they make you read in school sometimes? Well, this job is a lot like that. Besides, I can better further America by not being President." As Palin had never nominated a Vice President ("I never did know what they do"), this left Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi next in line for office. We look forward to her swearing-in tomorrow, and to President Palin's book.