And fuck y'all who don't agree with me! (Ha. Totally kidding.) As many of you already know, I have been part of the pack on DKos who has criticized our President for his stance on state secrets, illegal wiretapping, and torture.
So I have been considering today why I have swooned over Barack Hussein Obama for 4 1/2 years, and now I seem to have some concrete, solid answers. The man has only been our President for a little under 3 months. Would you like to know what he's accomplished thus far?
Good. Because I'm-a-gonna-tell-ya.
WHY I THINK BARACK OBAMA IS THE SHIZNIT!
April 17, 2009
by Shiz
(These are in no particular order.)
- He released 4 torture, DOJ memos held-over from the Bush administration yesterday, pretty much in full (and only redacting the names of those involved). Do you have ANY IDEA how many enemies he just made by doing this simple, lone, incredibly brave act? It speaks volumes about the kind of man that Obama truly is.
- He doesn't fucking care about how the naysayers feel about cap and trade regulations. Barack gave the EPA the orders to insist that carbon dioxide is harmful to living organisms (who woulda thunk it!) and, thusly, they concluded with Obama. Yay for Mother Earth!
- Speaking of Mother Earth, how about this awesome (and unforeseen) development regarding high-speed rail? Let's save M.E. the wear and tear by going green, baby! And anytime you wanna add the Wild, Wild West into the equation, President Obama, we would be totally down with that.
- He keeps on dissing the Republicans in terms of land/water oil drilling. Can I please get a shout out for how (former Colorado Senator) Ken Salazar is kicking butt and taking names in his new position as Secretary of the Interior? I am shockingly impressed (because he pissed me off something fierce in his previous position, thank you very much).
- He's closing down Guantanamo Bay, thank my Higher Power and stuff. Just like he said he would, he performed this feat on his 2nd full day in office. Thank you, Mr. Obama! We needed our country to authorize any excuses, justifications, and rationalizations on torture just like we needed another hole in our heads. Geneva Conventions, aren't you smiling at us now? Or at least grinning or something?
- He signed into law the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act of 2009. Women everywhere are grateful, Mr. President. Also, you are totally hot.
- Said hotness. A vast majority of American (and international, for that matter) women want to do you, and a fair majority of the men as well. When you gonna give us the time of day? Huh?! ~Sniff~ Fine, be that way. Be all in love with Michelle, Garden Goddess, the fantastic mother of your children. We're not jealous at all!
- How the hell did he negotiate that bullshit talk at the G-20 between China and France a few weeks ago? Is there a record of an American President ever doing such a thing before? And sorry, Sarkozy, but you're little and you're not that popular in France. Stop with the theatrics and go see a psychiatrist, will ya?
- He passed the Stimulus Bill with much debate, but little teeth. Republicans are stupid. He (via Rahm Emanuel) convinced 3 moderate Republicans to vote for it, enacting a tax cut to 95% of Americans into law in record-breaking time. (Also, I hear there was some other stuff in there. Heh.) As someone who is perpetually unemployed, I thank The Prez from the bottom of my extremely broke heart. I don't necessarily think it's as much money as the American economy needs, but it will do for now.
- He did not appoint friggin' Lawrence Summers as the Secretary of the Treasury. I don't like Tim Geithner, but I like Larry Summers even less. If Tim would just give it up and nationalize the banks ...
... Ah! In Shiz's Utopia here, it's beautiful blue skies, no war, lots of ponies!
I'm sorry, what were we talking about? Oh, yeah, right. Brooksley Born.
- He has eased up travel restrictions between the US and Cuba, which is unprecedented in my lifetime. And now, Raul Castro says he's ready to talk to the United States regarding human rights. Raise the roof!
- He made SCHIP into CHIP, effectively providing health coverage for millions of American children who desperately needed it. How can you not love a guy who clearly loves children so damn much?
- This! Pinching myself still. Ow. Pinch. Ow! Pinch. OW! OK OK, it's real.
- He rescinded Bush's stupid Mexico City policy, barring aid to international groups who provide women with their right to choose. Hallelujah!
- Hillary Clinton, Harold Koh, Tammy Duckworth, Gen. Eric Shinseki, Eric Holder, Dawn Johnsen, Janet Napolitano, Steven Chu, Samantha Power, etc. Yay!
Alright, I think that's enough (for now).
What, that's not enough? 15 supremely awesome examples of how Barack Obama is unlike his predecessor, George W. Bush? Listen. Barack has done more in 3 months of Presidential service than GWB did in 8 years. Suck on that!
Also, I need a cigarette and could use the break.