Hoo boy. No, really. Hoo-effin'-boy. If there was ever a topic that was prime for Forays Into Freeperville, the unbelievable debacle that is the story of Major Stefan Frederick Cook, the Freeper-Birther lunatic, is it. It's like a boxing ring with the leftists (us) on one side and the birther/Freepers (them) on the other:
Announcer: In this cawnah, wearing the bright blue silk shawts with rainbow piping and weighing in with intellect, perspective and a crazily-tickled funny bone...Lefty McLeftisssssssssst!!!
Annnnnnnnnd in this cawnah, wearing red silk shawts with black-and-white (emphasis on the WHITE) stripes and weighing in with self-delusion, lunacy and divorce from reality...Birthy McFreeper Paaaaaaaaaaants!!!
As you probably already know, Maj. Cook, a reservist who volunteered in May (note that date: months AFTER Barack Obama was sworn in as president) for deployment to Afghanistan recently filed a lawsuit claiming the president had no standing to send him into war since he wasn't a US citizen and not qualified to be president.
This week his orders were rescinded and was fired from his job with a military contractor.
Hilarity ensued...
Now, you and I know that this guy is a complete freak. He clearly volunteered knowing full well what he was going to do. His time spent in Freeperville as roaddog727 had him whipped up into a true Freeper-Birther lather. His "attorney", Orly Taitz (O...rly???) took the latte frother and whipped him up some more and PRESTO! Out came an ill-conceived lawsuit that makes him, her, and them look like complete tools.
Tools you say? Oh no, not to the Freepers. They are convinced that this is one giant conspiracy to hide President Obama's deep dark secret: that he's NOT a U.S.A. citizen at all. No! He's a ... (wait for it) ... KENYAN!!!
Yes, that's right, our president is a Kenyan. His mother, over four decades ago, somehow managed to figure out that he would one day beat the odds and become president and had the amazing foresight (apparently) to hide his true country of birth and conspired with dozens of Hawaiian doctors, nurses and other medical (as well as governmental) personnel to create an elaborate hoax that would only play itself out nearly 50 years later.
Hard to believe? Not to the denizens of Freeperville.
Before I go on, I just want to point out this little bit of laugh-inducing garp from the lawsuit Ms. O...rly filed:
(10) The evidence contained in Exhibit E shows that Barack Hussein Obama might have used as many as 149 addresses and 39 social security numbers prior to assuming the office of President. The social security number most commonly used by Barack Hussein Obama, is one issued in the state of Connecticut, the state where Barack Hussein Obama never resided and it shows him to be 119 years old. This coupled with the fact that Mr. Obama’s grandmother, Madeline Dunham was a volunteer at the Oahu Circuit Court Probate Department and had access to the social security numbers of the deceased, constitutes circumstantial evidence casting serious doubt on the legitimacy of Mr. Obama and his claims of being born on US territory. Exhibit F, the expert affidavit of renowned forensic document examiner Sandra Ramsey Lines, states that the certification of live birth posted by Mr. Obama as verification of his legitimacy, cannot be verified as genuine, and should be presumed fraudulent.
Oh, really, O...rly??? (By the way, you can view Ms. O...rly, Esq.'s filing at her blog HERE. Note that she apparently mis-spelled the name of one of the plaintiffs! Utter FAIL! LOL!)
And now, without further ado and fanfare, let us wade together into the steaming morass that exists on the other side of the political spectrum. I humbly bring you:
Forays Into Freeperville - Major Birther-Cook/Kook Edition
tcrlaf starts us off by decrying the Washington Independent that "outed" Major Birther-Cook:
The Washington Independent is a RABID Pro-lefty rag...
And they are trying to attack and minimalize Maj. Cook by associating him with "Those crazies at Free Republic".
[whispers]: tcrlaf, you know that he actually IS a Freeper, right???
But wait! It wasn't the Washington Independent that "outed" Major Birther-Cook, it was ... (wait for it again) ... the Daily Kos!!!
Here's tcrlaf again, responding to DieHard the Hunter
"Is it wise to out Maj Cook on this thread?"
He’s ALREADY been outed, by this, and on Daily KOS earlier in the day.
You’ll note it goes from a KOS posting, into the lefty media in a matter of hours?
and
On KOS in the last 48 hours, I have noticed diaries posted by TWO US Senators, several congressmen, several media types, and DOXENS of "Issue Groups".
KOS has become the clearing house for manipulating the news to a leftist viewpoint. Every week now, it seems yet ANOTHER Mainstream Media member is outed as a KOS poster.
Yup, that's right. We here at the Daily Kos OWN the muthafukken press and don'tchyoo fuggeddit, bud. [Dramatic eyeroll]
(Here's a funny thing: DieHard the Hunter complained bitterly about people continuing to comment on a thread that "outed" Major Birther-Cook because it would make it easier for the leftists to "dig up dirt" on him. His comment was #102 on the thread and was like his tenth comment on that particular thread. Heh.)
Tzimisce gets excited:
...I think the new civil war is now in motion....
What if they held a civil war and nobody showed up? Guess it would look like an Independence Day 2009 Tea Party...
Rodney Dangerfield asks a pertinent(?) question:
So what is Coke Zero going to do when hundreds of our soldiers refuse to follow orders until he proves he is a citizen?
Ummmm...fire they asses, too???
nightlight7 sees a Divine Hand at work:
It's amazing how coordinated the liberal smear machine is. In that light, it is even more amazing that Sarah Palin is still beating them, even though they did everything they possibly could to destroy her. It just shows there is a higher power behind her. And they can feel it and that is what horrifies them about her.
Wait. Sarah Palin is beating us? Jesus! Really?! I had no idea. I must have been laughing too goddam hard at her to even realize. Now, you'll excuse me, I have to go lube up the smear machine so we can continue our coordinated effort with the media and "government operatives" to discredit Freeperville and Major Birther-Cook...
Oscar the Grouch is ready:
I feel a Maj Cook Legal Defense Fund Freepathon coming on......
Is that like a hard-on or something???
Marty62 goes off the deep end, not far from where Marty normally sits, I'm thinkin'...
It is a direct attack at the free speech of the American People.
You disagree with us, and we will destroy you mentality. Next thing you know we will have "reeducation camps" China-Moa. Communist Russia were a little more direct. You went to prison in Siberia.
Looks like the Socialist have hung on to their copies of Moa’s "Little Red Book"
Uhhhhh...yeah. Right. Gotchya. Moa the Socialist. Got it. I wonder if he ever met Mao the Communist?
[Eclectablog backs away slowly, keeping his eye on Marty62...]
leapfrog0202 just doesn't unnerstan':
Good heavens! He’s fighting the good fight for all our troops! Why should they be ordered into battle to fight and possibly die by someone that isn’t legally entitled to be the prez?
BTW my dad served in the Korean War, Vietnam War and was captured there before escaping. My husband served in Desert Storm and between the two of them spent a total of not quite 50 years in the Air Force. My son-in-law was a Marine and is now Active Air Guard and my daughter was a Marine so I know what I’m talking about.
Uh, froggy? C'mere a sec. [whispers]: Look, I know yer like an expert an' stuff but you know this is the war that George W. Bush started, right? And it's one that most people, even the dirty hippy libs actually think is okay, or at least was okay? You realize that, right? This isn't a war President Obama started? Just checkin'.
sam_paine has an interesting perspective:
Given how so many freepers like Kristinn have morphed into public personae...frankly I think this does two things:
1- It elevates FR out of the anonymous shadows, into a community of real people...like the difference between infantile obscene YouTube posts, and authored pieces on National Review, where they are responsible for what they say. People respect NRO's the Corner as a source of info...but not YouTube posts.
2- It should (could) improve the 'quality' of posts around here.
Dude, if you think this whole fiasco makes Freeperville look better, you are totally deluded. "Infantile obscene" is about as good as you're going to get with most folks. On point #2, though, you may be right. After all, it wouldn't take a whole lot to improve the quality of the posts in Freeperville. Hell, a few minutes with a third-grade grammar book and spelling list would double the quality, if ya ask me.
jurroppi1 is ready:
I’d stand next to him any day of the week. He is honorably discharging his oath as far as I can see it.
So the other hundreds of thousands of men and women in the Armed Forces aren't? Way to 'support the troops' there, bub.
I'm not sure what this bit from MHGinTN means but it's fucking hiLARious!
Leftists are so stupid. By his own willingness to deploy to the war theater when Barry the affirmative action bastard figure liar-in-chief was not pres__ent cic, it is blatantly obvious that the ineligibility of the cic is the focus for his current action! ... Sharks, when in a mindless feeding frenzy, are known to devour one of their own when it is nicked in the frenzy.
Yeah, okay, dude. Whatevs... I should add that MHGinTN has the most ironic tagline of nearly any I've seen in Freeperville lately: "Believing they cannot be deceived, they cannot be convinced when they are deceived."
Frantzie is frantic:
Every enlisted and officer being deployed needs to call Orly.
I know - our military is supposed to follow orders and where does it stop. Okay - Show us a real BC. He can’t - he blinked.
People need to start thinking about how early Americans said NO to King George and corrupt English overlord govt. We have the same thing now but it is even more corrupt.
The country is being looted and invaded by illegals.
Ooooooo...SCARY!!! But, really. Barack Obama (Blinky McBlinkington) = King George? Really?
djf has it figgerd out:
Now, I’m not so sure about Obamas temperment.
But I am certain of one thing.
If a long form certificate proving his eligibility existed, his better half would pull a "In your face, sucka", and slap it down on the table so fast it would make your head spin.
Put up or shut up time passed long ago. He’s bluffing. He’s ineligible. That’s the only rational conclusion.
With analysis like that, the rest of us should just STFU and go home. No arguin' with them rational 'facts'. Just sayin'...
FARS manages to push things over the edge even further:
A well educated Persian lady pointed ut to me today that Obama and Khomeini were like twins. Both empty headed other than violent Marxist-Islamist mindsets, both foreign invaders and both coming in on the infatuation of a fatuous populace who were ignorant yet naive enough to welcome their destrction into theif midst.
"He’s just another Khomeini for America" she said.
There isn't enough snark in the world to respond to that bit of utter tripe.
April Lexington senses something more sinister:
It means Obama slammed the door in her face by taking away the guy's claim. The case is now moot because the order has been withdrawn. This is not a win. It is a setback because Orly needs a new plaintiff with a new claim. Again, Orly, watch your back. These guys are Russian trained!
Yeah, O...rly, watch your back or the communists that run the USA government will keeeeeeeeeeeel you BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!
Red Steel connects the dots:
Anything and everything would be null and void not only the Majors orders. EOs, appointments, cabinet members, signed laws, etcetera. We just don’t know with 100% certainty if he’s not Constitutionally qualified to hold office.
Right. Just like we don't know with 100% certainty that you have a fucking clue. No. Wait. I take that back. We DO know.
You don't.
Thumper1960 is getting excited...
Interesting........
Did not the Honduran military have a hand in ousting their anti-Constitutional 'presidente' for doing unlawful and illegal deeds?
What are the chances that a certain element within the US military establishment would be poised to "rescue" the Constitution and the nation by working in manners leading to the outing of an illegitimate president?
Curiouser and curiouser...........
Yeah, yeah. And we all KNOW that the Armed Forces of the U.S.A. are almost identical to the Honduran military. Shit, they're practically twins!
pizamoto sees into the future:
I’m waiting for the families of those lost in Iraq and Afghanistan to file a law suit against 0bama.
His self serving arrogance could very well be the basis for International legal action, as well, from Citizens and Government officials of those Countries.
Wait, they're going to take legal action against President Obama for wars that were started by George W. Bush? That. Does. Not. Com. Pute...
conservativegramma is all OHHHH NOOOOOEEEEZZZZ!!! and shit:
Based on the WND story that the PENTAGON had the orders revoked and then fired Cook I'd say you now have to add the PENTAGON to the list of CORRUPTION.
The absolute magnitude of this coup de tat and HIGH TREASON by our government officials is mindboggling. If the Pentagon and our highest military officials are now officially part of the coup de tat we can no longer count on them either! We've now lost Congress, SCOTUS, and the military. I don't see anyway out now but revolution or enslavement. Time to lock and load. I intend to go down fighting.
Don't fight it gramma. It's so much easier if you jusssssssst relaaaaaaaax and gooooooo with the flooooooooooow...
So, anyway, things were pretty bad over in Freeperland. The Freepers were abuzz and the lines were lit up. But then...THEN Major Birther-Cook got his ass fired from his civilian job with a defense contractor. Oh boy did that fire things up even more.
bgill just knew something like this was gonna go down. And he knew why:
Knew something along this line was bound to happen be it some family scandal or pulling up past FR posts. Clinton had Arkancide. Hussein’s MO hasn’t been named but it’s known he’ll pull out all stops to destroy the private lives of anyone who questions him.
Maybe they'll call it an Obamabortion. 'Cause he was a Birther? Get it? [tap, tap]... Is this thing even on???
RinaseaofDs has an "interesting" idea:
Eventually, he’ll file a whistleblower suit and make out. He had to see this coming. Until this sorts out, he had to know he was in for it.
He should start writing his book. It’s likely going to be taught in schools.
Yeah, right, in schools. Maybe as part of Career Week during the section titled "How to Keep Your Job and Not Look Like a Complete Whack Job Tool in Front of the Entire Fucking Country". Or something...
ForeignDude goes all cynical and shit:
That assumes anybody is paying attention to this. Few people are even aware that questions have arisen about Obama’s birthplace.
There simply is too much going on. As Glenn Beck noted recently, a typical Alinsky tactic is to "overwhelm the system" by moving along multiple political fronts. We thus have Obama movement on the environment, health care, the economy, free speech/fairness doctrine, nuclear proliferation at the same time. The opposition cannot "freeze" any of these issues and target it — and so cannot effectively oppose what appears to be overwhelming political momentum. In that tidal wave of movement, the BC issue is a drop.
Thus, there is no critical mass (in raw numbers) nor an influential lobby (i.e., "movers and shakers") for the Obama legitimacy issue. MAJ Cook is not Joe the Plumber — he does not have that kind of exposure or salience. Obama and his acolytes will destroy Cook, and only a few will know that the man ever existed.
Dude, you should be glad if "few people" are aware of the Birther freakshow or that the Major ever existed. But, it's true. You Birthers are way too busy fighting the Obama administration on the nuclear proliferation issue to get involved with Major Birther-Cook's little sideshow. Sure you are...
Bobkk47 hops on the paranoia bus:
And what will Jim Rob* do when he is asked to provide all the Email addresses for Freepers?
That won't happen until Obama's second term begins, concurrently with the building of the forced labor camps which will be occupied by "domestic terrorists", i.e. FReepers, military veterans, conservatives etc.
No, it'll happen before that. We need someone to build all those forced labor camps. Oops, did I say that out loud? Dang, our evil plan has been revealed. Crap.
*[Ed. note: "Jim Rob" is Jim Robinson, the Mayor of Freeperville]
And here is a sampling of some of the more common responses to Major Birther-Cook's firing:
wk4bush2004:
The new Kremlin has spoken....
the_Watchman:
Its the Chicago way! Keep it out of any courtroom where "discovery" might occur.
clintonh8r:
We all work for The Kenyan now.
bikerman:
The magic negro has spoken. Bow to the ole great messiah.
WhistlingPastTheGraveyard:
Contractors didn’t do anything but obey an order, which came from the Chicago mafia occupying 1600 Pennsylvania via the DoD.
Typical Whitey:
Obama had him fired because he is WHITE....
gwilhelm56:
I was once scolded by the "We’re above that" group for referring to NOBAMA as der FUHRER.
It now appears I was Correct and will go back to doing so.
HEIL FUHRER OBAMA!
What's funny about Freepers is that they can never get it together enough to decide if our president is a fascist, a socialist or a communist. Apparently, in their minds, the three aren't mutually exclusive.
ExTexMarine 'schplains things to the teeming masses:
Did you ever serve in the military? It is a part of our DUTY to this country and to the constitution to REFUSE illegal and unlawful orders. If President Obama orders you to kill unarmed civilians, are you supposed to follows blindly?
If he is illegally filling the White House, by usurping the Constitution, then his orders were ILLEGAL and it is his duty to refuse those orders.
No, no, no, Tex, you're only supposed to follow illegal and unlawful orders if the president is George W. Bush. Do I have to 'schplain everything to you???
dragonbluestar points out:
There seems to be a Facebook group supporting him.
Yeah, well, there was a Facebook group supporting the kitty that got flushed down the toilet, too...
bustinchops is indignant:
I’d like to see our entire military stand down under this issue. Force ostammer to put up or shut up. Americans will not long stand for no military protection over lack of production of a birth certificate.
I’ve said since it became apparent that ostammer would be the rat nominee that anybody who joins the military under his watch is an utter fool.
"Support the Troops" really has taken on a new meaning in Freeperville in the past seven months, hasn't it?
In response to a comment from wolfcreek, XenaLee responds:
"He’s only human, right?"
I wouldn't count on it. Especially since we're not allowed to see his REAL birth certificate as proof.
And especially since only a soul-less ghoul would push legislation that would deny medical attention to a live, fully formed human infant. On that basis alone, I'd be willing to bet that Barry AND Michelle are both non-humans.
Apparently "Support the president" also has a new meaning...
Man50D can't get no satisfaction:
The media is finally picking up this issue. It's going viral. I tried to discuss it today with a radio talk shoe host but he hung up on me.
THAT, of course, is the only appropriate response.
And, finally, speaking on behalf of the entire population of Freeperville, GOPVet confesses:
Spelling was never my best attribute
GOPVet, I have to say, after spending more than three hours in Freeperville in the past coupla days, your comment was the only one I read where I wanted to stand up and say "Fuck YEAH!" Props to you, bud, props to you.
With that, I'm going into detox to purge the ooginess from my system. Have fun in the comments.