SPECIAL FORTUNE-TELLING EDITION!
Hello and welcome to Thursday’s pootie and woozle diary. We are thrilled to be joined today by a psychic of world renown who will mingle with us in the comments section and tell fortunes on request.
Without further ado... Please give him a warm pootie and woozle welcome...
The ONE, the ONLY...
| Is dis thing on?
(thump thump thump thump) |
| Okay. Ahem. Greetings, my name is... |
| Hey! Where is mah special cosmic background? Yus expect me to do this nekkid? |
| Dat’s better. Greetings! I am Andy the Magnificent—Knower of all! SEER of ALL! |
| I sees into yer past. I sees into yer present. I sees into yer future. I sees London, I sees France—I sees Nurse Kelley’s... |
| Yus get the picture. I scrut the inscrutable and eff the ineffable. Ask me for your fortune... |
| IF YOU DARE! |
Disclaimer: All fortunes are prophesied in advance and handed out in the order written; first come, first served. Offer good while supplies last. Void where prohibited. Side effects may include headache and drowsiness.