The American people have been watching the slow-motion train wreck in the Gulf for more than 3 weeks. After all of the anguish of the past 2 years, they have to watch as one of America's most beloved regions is drowned in noxious sludge.
They were worried. Then they were scared. Now they're pissed.
You are hoping that the top kill will work on Wed (or Thurs or ... soon). If it does, that will shut them up. They won't give you great props, but they may get off your back. But what if it doesn't work? What will you do to keep them off your back then? As everyone is so fond of saying ... What's your f*ing Plan B?
Well, relax. I have a solution. You just have to go over the fold to see it.
Look, I know you guys are trying. I know you assembled the best and brightest. I know they are pulling all-nighters. I know they are scary smart, tough as nails, and yada, yada, yada.
But the American people can't see them working. They have to take everything on faith. Even as they have lost faith in most American institutions and especially in the Government. And with nothing but a live feed of an obscenity to view on the their TVs, they aren't going to do anything but get more and more enraged.
But the solution is simple. It is a blend of two of America's most cherished cultural institutions:
- A TV reality show (think Deadliest Catch).
- The sports color commentator (think Madden).
Here's the step by step on how you do it:
You need some expert 'Color' Commentators:
Find the 8 or 10 of the best, most articulate engineering teaching professors (mechanical, petroleum, fluid dynamics, chemical engineering, etc.) in the country (try MIT, Purdue, RPI, Texas A&M ...) and fly them to LA.
Ask any engineering school Dean and he/she will tell you exactly the person(s) on their staff that would be perfect for the role.
Give the professors badges that give them total access. They can attend any meeting. Sit beside any ROV operator. Read any report. They have handheld cameras - and a cameraperson at their beck and call.
You need some On-air 'Talent' Commentators:
For example:
Jay Barbree - NBC News space coverage
Sean Riley - National Geographic's 'World's Toughest Fixes'
Mike Ross - Discovery's Dirty Jobs
If they're busy, draft em.
You need a studio, access and a format:
Set up a small TV studio in or close to the BP Houma HQ.
The profs work in shifts, 24x7. There are always 2 or 3 in the place at any one time. They scout, they learn, they read, they ask questions (they will know how not to get in the way at critical times).
As they gather info, they rotate into the studio to try to explain it to the American people as simply and clearly as they can. They goal is to have someone on camera at all times.
The on-air Talent rotate as well - their job is to listen with a 'television viewer's ears' to keep the profs from going too far off course. But this reality TV, so its the Profs' show. If the profs disagree about what is being said or done, they need to debate it - both sides, pros and cons, risks and rewards.
Bottom Line:
If top kill doesn't work. This is your best bet. Americans will be scared, worried and pissed. They need to see the best and brightest as they work the problem.
Show them. Let them be voyeurs. Make them feel like they are part of the solution. Plus, it will be the most riveting TV in a long, long, long time.