However you think of it, the result is the same: you're stuck.
We've all been there, at one time or another. It might have been in school, in the workplace, or a relationship. We might've been working toward a particular goal, and for whatever reason, plateaued at some point before reaching it.
A dieter unable to shift those last few pounds.
The dreaded ABD (All But Dissertation) in grad school.
And -- for many of those reading this -- the smoker who hits a certain point in the quitting process and can't quite take that next step -- either cutting back the last few smokes, or letting go for good. We cling to the behavior, and the pattern of thought that supports it, almost without realizing what we're doing. We may acknowledge what's going on, but we're often at a loss to explain why, or recognize how we might move past it.
Part of this pattern of behavior is rooted in fear -- fear of failure, or conversely, fear of success. Failure is an unpleasant but known quantity, and that alone is enough to keep some people from taking a chance or taking a leap or fully committing to a course of action.
Anyone who has ever attempted major behavior modification knows that self-sabotage is almost too easy. Cheat on the diet or exercise plan. Miss a deadline. Be late for a date. Screw up an important report that jeopardizes your job, or say the wrong thing in an interview that jeopardizes your chance at getting one.
Or, y'know, have just one cigarette.
It's even easier to fall into this pattern of behavior when you feel like you might be on your own, that nobody gets what you're going through, that nobody else has the answers either, that the behavior itself will see you through. Don't buy into it -- you're not alone! There are lots of people here who actually do get what you're going through, who have been stuck at one time or another, and -- best of all -- are happy to help you get UNstuck.
Current members of the GUS team:
1BQ, 3rdGenFeminist, Abra Crabcakeya, addisnana, AfroPonix, aishmael, Alpha99, ambeeeant, American in Kathmandu, amk for obama, andsarahtoo, Anne933, anodnhajo, aoeu, aquarius2001, arcadesproject, Archie2227, Arthur Wolf (in memoriam), assyrian64, awkawk, b4uknowit, bamablue, BARAKABETH, barnowl, bdizz, beatpanda, BFSkinner, bgblcklab1, Bike Crash, BirderWitch, bleeding heart, blingbling65, blue husky, Blue Intrigue, BlueJessamine, bluestatedem84, BoiseBlue, Brahman Colorado, breedlovinit, BrenP, BrowniesAreGood, bsmechanic, burrow owl, CathodeRay, cee4, Cen Den, ChocolateChris, ChurchofBruce, Cleante, Colorado is the Shiznit, coloradomomma, Common Sense Mainer, coppercelt, dadanation, dangoch, Dauphin, demkat620, Dexter, DiegoUK, Dingodude, distraught, dolfin66, donnamarie, Donna O, DRo, droogie6655321, duckhunter, EdgedInBlue, effervescent, El barragas, ericlewis0, Everest42, Ex Con, fhamme, Fineena, fiona2, fishhawk, Flea, FlipperWaves, flumptytail, FrugalGranny, Garrett, Gator, gchaucer2, Geiiga, Georgianna Darcy, GN1927, gooderservice, gooners, gravlax, greylox, grndrush, GrumpyWarriorPoet, Haole in Hawaii, HeyMikey, hideinplainsight, High Tide, hiliner68, hulibow, I love OCD, Im a frayed knot, imisa, Indexer, indyada, Interceptor7, inventor, I said GOOD DAY sir, itsbenj, Jahiz, JamesEB, janl1776, jbou, Jeffersonian Democrat, jmadlc55, Joe's Steven aka Steven, john07801, johngoes, jsfox, JVolvo's Mom, jwinIL14, Jyrinx, kai99, kailuacaton, Kelly of PA, kestrel9000, khloemi, Khun David, Kitsap River, Kodiak54, Ksholl, labwitchy, Lady Kestrel, ladypockt, Lahdee, langerdang, LarsThorwald, last starfighter, Laurie Gator, Lipstick Liberal, litoralis, lmdonovan, lockewasright, longislandny, luvsathoroughbred, maggiemay, magicsister, mango, Marc in KS, marknspokane, maryabein, Matt Esler, mdemploi, Micburke, michael1104, Mikeguyver, MillieNeon, Minerva1157, MinervainNH, Missys Brother, Morague, Mr Bojangles, mrsgoo, mskitty, msmacgyver, MsWings, nannyboz, ncsuLAN, Nick Zouroudis, notgivingup, NY brit expat, operculum, one pissed off democrat, OrangeMike, Ordvefa, OverTheEdge, paige, PaintyKat, paradox, parryander, Pennsylvanian, phrogge prince, Positronicus, post rational, Proud Mom and Grandma, psycho liberal, ptolemynm, Purple Priestess, PvtJarHead, real world chick, red mittens, Reepicheep, relentless, revelwoodie, revsue, Rex Manning, rexymeteorite, RiaD, rickeagle, ridemybike, rincewind, rkex, roadlion, Roger Fox, Rosebuddear, Rudini, Safina, SallyCat, Sark Svemes, sboucher, scooter in brooklyn, Scrapyard Ape, seenaymah, sfbob, sgary, Shahryar, sheddhead, shmuelman, slowbutsure, smartcookienyc, smeesq, snoopydawg, snorwich, SoCalHobbit, sofia, soonergrunt, sowsearsoup, SpecialKinFlag, spmozart, SpotTheCat, Statusquomustgo, tallmom, Tay, ThAnswr, theatre goon, TheStoopingRabbit, TigerMom, tiredofcrap, tonyahky, Toyotabob7, Treefrog, triciawyse, trueblueliberal, ttanner, Turn VABlue, Turtle Bay, uc booker, Unduna, Unforgiven, Vacationland, valadon, Vayle, waytac, webranding, weelzup, Wes Opinion, willy be frantic, willy mugobeer, Wood Dragon, wolfie1818, Wordsinthewind, Wreck Smurfy, x, yet another liberal, Zotz
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