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I really don't know what to write, or frankly, even why I'm writing this.  

Maybe I'm hoping that it will somehow help to vent a bit. Maybe I'm trying to make sense of it and get over the shock to prepare myself for what's coming. I don't know. All I know is that there's a pile of work staring at me and the house looks like a freakin' disaster zone but I can't seem to do much of anything but sit here and feel like crap. I thought it would be good to work to get my mind off things, but that's not working out too well.

I knew they wouldn't be around forever but it still comes as a shock.  And both of them at the same time - well, it's just too much.

Both of my grandmothers are up north and I'm living down south now.  There's not a whole lot I can do other than get news updates from the family up there.

It's a horrible feeling sitting here waiting for news...and every time the phone rings you're wondering if that will be the call.

My one grandmother is very close.  It will most likely be in a matter of days.  The other one, no one knows, but it's not looking good and I don't expect it to be too long without a miraculous change sometime soon.  Of course I'd love for that to happen but I have to be realistic too and it just doesn't look good.

Well- I don't know what else to say and I'm starting to tear up now.  Thanks for listening guys.

Originally posted to newyorknewyork on Tue Jul 27, 2010 at 09:18 AM PDT.

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