Florida changed the law to renew Driver's Licenses awhile back and mine expires this year. So, being a good Girl Scout, I went to the web site to see what I had to do; and sure enough, I'm going to have to go in person to the DMV to renew my license and show proper ID.
A couple clicks later to find out what that's going to entail and ...
OMG! What were they thinking!?!
This is a renewal! I already submitted this stuff! I already proved it!
What a pain in the neck!
This law was passed by a Republican majority in the Florida Legislature and no doubt a bunch of Blue Dogs went along with it. We need more and better Democrats...., but I digress.
Ok, I'm over it. I live in a paranoid world where you have to prove you are not a terrorist or here illegally over and over again. Got it.
At least I'm "safe"..., whatever that means.
I should have clued in at where the first Florida DMV web page stated:
Bring the Required ID
Failing to bring acceptable identification is the most common reason people fail to get their Florida drivers license. And it can be painful. First you will wait, and wait, and wait – then you will present your ID. If you don’t have the required documents you go home.
emphasis added and spelling corrected
The required documents that you have to have or "go home" are:
Document requirements include: Primary Identification, Proof of Social Security Number, 2 Proofs of Residential Address
All to renew a Driver's License that I have had for over 25 years.
Translation: I need to take:
- My birth certificate
- My Social Security Card and a recent pay stub or SSA statement proving that my Social Security Number is valid.
- 2 proofs of my current residential address like my Voter's Registration Card and a Utility bill or some financial statement in my name that is less than 2 months old.
- Something to read or do while I wait and wait and wait and wait for my turn.
All to replace a document that I've had for over 25 years.
All to replace a document that Broward County uses to successfully call me for jury duty.
All to make sure I'm really me.
All to make us "safe".
Now for a snarky moment. I think Florida can afford a spell checker and can afford to pay for someone competent enough to use a spell checker. Yes, I realize that's may sound hypocritical coming from someone who is spelling challenged, but gee whiz, that's an official State of Florida website! I'd run it through a spell checker and have 3 friends read it before uploading it. Ok, snark over, I'm breathing normally.
Moving on. Getting proof of my current residential address is more difficult than it needed to be. For some reason, many moons ago; all the utility bills were put in hubby's name (probably because he made the calls to do it when we moved to this house, but then, again, the house is primarily in my name just in case anyone is starting to think I bind my feet). That leaves financial statements, ok, got it. We're good on that.
That leaves:
Acceptable Primary Identification, which for me, is my New York birth certificate or a U.S. Passport. I don't have a Passport and would need a birth certificate to get a Passport, so it's a birth certificate for me. I have the birth certificate issued by the hospital - that's no good; I called - it's no good because it's not certified. The "real" one is lost. I know I had it. Mom gave it to me years ago, but it's gone. Too many boxes of paper and too many moves. I'm going to have to replace it.
Wouldn't you know, New York has an expensive birth certificate replacement service. I can spend $65 and get it within a week, spend $45 and get it in a month or spend $30 and get it in 2 months (only in New York would they have a cut rate for lousy service.
It's more difficult to get a copy of your birth certificate in the post 9/11 world. Not only do you have to have a valid reason and have valid relationship to the person on the birth certificate to get it; you may also need to be able to answer obscure questions that only you would remember to get it.
Valid Reason
New York gave me a convenient check box to indicate why I need my birth certificate. To get a Driver's License
With identity theft so prevalent, I have to prove it's me ordering a certificate of my birth. So, when I mail in the request, it has to go with a copy of my current Driver's License and 2 utility bills proving I live where I live. I had to call and find out if mortgage statements and a voter's registration card would be acceptable in lieu of utility bills only to get a lecture on how dangerous it is for a woman to let her husband have all the utility bills in his name. Ready. Set. Roll Eyes.
Yep, no utility bills, so I'm booted to the internets method. Caching! Baby! It's only $35 more than the lousy service method, but I'm going to get it within a week. I don't have to fax or scan mail a copy of my Driver's License, but I had to answer questions that, quite frankly, is a little scary the service contracted by the State of New York knew to ask about my life in Florida. I only had to remember an address I lived at for short time over 20 years ago and remember the month and year we sold some property over 15 years ago to do it. Hubby tells me he had no chance of knowing the right answers to the questions. (At least they didn't know to ask me the name of my first dog - which, ironically, hubby knows.)
Mission Accomplished!
It's in the mail to me...and it only cost me about $65.
Let's Review.
I need to renew my Driver's License and need my birth certificate to do it.
I don't have my birth certificate and need to replace it so I can renew my Driver's License.
I need my Driver's License to replace my Birth Certificate by mail.
My newly replaced birth certificate will help me renew my Driver's License.
Oh, brother
or, as Winnie the Pooh says, "Oh bother!"
Madness.
All this to get an updated document that I've had for over 25 years that proves I'm really me.
All this to get a replacement document that proves I live where I live.
All this so we can be "safe" - whatever that means.
Then, hubby wondered, "What if they question the validity of the certificate when you present it?"
Why would they do that? ...Oh, yeah. Naw, that won't happen, I'm not President of the United States.
BTW, can anyone tell me how illegal aliens are supposed to be getting Driver's Licenses?