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Since you seem to be a rock star in the legal world of Rutherford County these days, I was wondering if you’d be willing to be a gun-for-hire in a lawsuit a few of us were thinking about filing.  We were talking about it and you would be absolutely perfect, I mean I just know you will be able to expose these people for who they are and get our message out for all the news cameras to see.  And in addition to paying for all of your legal fees I’d even be willing to buy you a brand new stripped suit with a matching bow tie and a pair of Gucci sunglasses.

An Open Letter to Attorney Joe Brandon:

(from Eric Allen Bell)

Hey Joe -

Since you seem to be a rock star in the legal world of Rutherford County these days, I was wondering if you’d be willing to be a gun-for-hire in a lawsuit a few of us were thinking about filing.  We were talking about it and you would be absolutely perfect, I mean I just know you will be able to expose these people for who they are and get our message out for all the news cameras to see.  And in addition to paying for all of your legal fees I’d even be willing to buy you a brand new stripped suit with a matching bow tie and a pair of Gucci sunglasses.

So here is the idea:  We would like to sue the Republican Party of Rutherford County.  This of course would be a stepping stone, just like your anti-mosque suit, to getting this thing all the way up to the Supreme Court.  We want your help in suing the Republican Party of Rutherford County on the basis that they are not really a political party but more of a religion. After all, a great deal of their literature does point to a religious orientation. We would then take aim at their inappropriate activities, as a religion, in trying to influence elections.  Because, and I’m sure you will agree, the law makes it pretty clear that anything theologically-driven should not be trying to meddle with politics.

I know at first this might seem like a crazy idea to you, maybe a little impulsive, risky perhaps.  In fact, the basis for it is not even entirely true.  But today when you are laying down under those heat lamps at the tanning salon, I want you to really think about this and take it in.  We are talking about going up against the biggest hate group in America!  (Not really, but you could totally make it look that way, right?)

Have you ever noticed that all of their leaders believe the same theology (more or less)?  Look this "Sharia Law" scare is going to die out.  It doesn’t have legs.  Eventually people are going to find out the truth.  The idea that all or most Muslims think they have a religious duty to kill all non-believers for instance... I mean, come on?  People have gotten a little dumbed-down in this country, but they aren’t that stupid.  This "Islam is not a religion" thing you’re doing has a shelf life before people figure it out for the hoax it is.  And then what?  Market it all you want but Islamophobia will never become the next Red Scare.  

However, going up against the Republican Party?  Their violent Jihad against the innocent people of Iraq has killed over a million civilians under the great warlord George W. Bush.  That same radical cleric, during the 8 years that he, his disciples and his religious leader Sheikh Karl Rove occupied the Oval Office - they started off government meetings with a prayer to their deity!  The Religious Right makes or breaks Presidents and they hide behind the safety of the Republican Party.  It’s all there.  Right?

And what about their Supreme Leader from the 1980’s, Sheikh Ronald Reagan?  He actually said that his deity talked to him and gave him instructions on how to run the country.  Maybe that is where he got the idea to empty out all of the mental hospitals and allow schizophrenics to die cold and hungry on the streets.   And this so-called political party has made a saint out of him.

They use a theology to come up with many of the laws they want to pass concerning marriage equality, stem cell research, foreign policy in the Middle East and the list goes on and they do it under the banner of the Republican Party.  Maybe you could call for their more radical and often white supremacist faction, "The Tea Party" to be investigated.  I mean if anyone is harboring radicals it’s them.  And just like you are doing with the Muslims, we don’t even have to involve law enforcement.  You can find "concerned citizens" (that was a brilliant move by the way) to do their own investigations using Google.

Aren’t these the same people who tried to stop the civil rights movement back in the day.  If you recall, many of the segregationists made it clear that they believed that their "God" did not intend for the races to mix and the Republican Party totally backed them and fought civil rights legislation like... well like it was a holy war.

I could dig up more examples, but that’s kinda your job.  I mean, this is a little half-baked so you’re going to have to use a little smoke and mirrors, but you totally rock at that.  The thing is, don’t bring any actual Republicans in to testify because that would kill this thing.  Just like you had the good sense not to bring in any real Muslims to testify on this current lawsuit, bringing in real Republicans might expose the reality that in fact they do not all think the same way and they are not all bad.  So stay clear of that.

Go after the big stuff.  Look at the past few decades, figure out the body count, the loss of jobs, the foreclosures, the Wall Street crimes, the loss of worker rights, and the shift of wealth upward and I’m sure you’ll come up with a compelling argument.  You could even find opinions in blogs and have an expert witness web guy present them as facts.

I know, it’s a kind of baseless argument actually, but if anyone can put a spin on that - you can.  And just like that last press conference you did, using a glass encased Holy Bible out on government property as your podium, you can do that again but this time it will really help to sell our point.  Just go back, rewrite that same speech crossing out the word "DOJ" and substitute it with "GOP" and we would have some killer sound bytes for the evening news.

You say your fees were paid to you through Laurie Cardoza-Moore’s group, "Proclaiming Justice to the Nations".  Clearly Laurie used Howard and Sally Wall for their political connections and ties to the community so they she could hustle little church ladies like Millie into paying your fees.  I can do that.  Hell, I could hire Laurie to do that.  If you will take on this lawsuit, I will come up with your fee.  No joke.  This is for real.

Get back to me.
Eric Allen Bell

Eric@BellMedia.org

Originally posted to Eric Allen Bell on Tue Oct 26, 2010 at 05:45 AM PDT.

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