I used to make wisecracks about this, now here it is as a news report.
Cops' Use of Illegal Steroids a 'Big Problem'.
A 'big problem'
Ya think?
The pace of investigations into steroid use in the police ranks has picked up in recent months:
- * A former police officer in Canby, Ore., who allegedly took delivery of some steroids while on duty pleaded guilty in February to purchasing steroids.
- An officer in South Bend, Ind., pleaded no contest in March to selling steroids.
- A Cleveland police officer was sentenced to a year in prison and five years of supervised release in April after he was found guilty of illegally purchasing steroids.
- A dealer in Paw Paw, Mich., allegedly told authorities that he supplied "several police officers" with steroids, which led one Kalamazoo officer to resign in May.
Basically, more and more cops are getting interested in 'the juice'.
I have LONG suspected this to be involved with a lot of the incidents wherein we find a cop - or 2 or 3 or 4 - unleashing a hail of gunfire at some suspect with the skinniest of excuses. I assume these police officers are drug tested after such incidents.
A lawyer for an 84-year-old Florida man who had his neck broken in September when he was thrown to the ground sought to get the Orlando police officer involved in the incident tested for steroids. The request was denied by the department, which claimed the test would violate the officer's rights.
Oh my. Rights.
Do the police have anything to hide?
Us mere mortal civilians have to pee on command for friggin' nothing, but you break somebody's neck or go to war on a street and you're rights might be violated?
Puh-leeeeze.
An officer reports that cops 'of course' have the ever-present 'zero-tolerance' for drug use, but they still believe in 'due process' to avoid any 'unnecessary investigations'.
I couldn't read or type that with a straight face. Cops have sought ways around the 4th Amendment for generations and all of a sudden it's "Hey buddy, we gots due processes around here".
IS the problem somehow new?
Nope:
Larry Gaines, chairman of the Department of Criminal Justice at California State San Bernardino, authored the first major paper on steroid use in law enforcement two decades ago. He said the rise in usage in steroids among the ranks coincided with a change of culture as many departments began to stress physical fitness.
More hilarity: massive, unnatural muscles acquired via chemical abuse AIN'T 'health.
"I don't know what would have to happen to make this a major issue," Gaines said. "Essentially, this has become commonplace."
Hey - at least they aren't smoke mary-ju-wanna