They didn't come for your right to a jury trial, so you never had a reason to shout about it. Or rather, they did come for that right, but you weren't using it. You're not a criminal, certainly not a terrorist, possible terrorist, alleged terrorist, someone who looks like a terrorist; none of those things. What amendment was that anyway? Sixth? Seventh? Not one of the popular amendments. Not one of those that people get huffy about on Sunday talk shows. Why you barely knew you had it in the first place. Just let it go.
The same goes with those other bits of legal fluff. The right to know what you're charged with, the right to know who is testifying against you. That's all just a load of lawyer talk, isn't it? Why would you ever need such things? That sounds like exactly the sort of claptrap that gets in the way when the police are just trying to do their job. Let it go.
And those other things -- a speedy trial, the right to a public defender. Goodness, if you actually had to give people a trial in a reasonable amount of time and really had to provide them with a lawyer who met them before entering the courtroom, can imagine what all that would cost? I mean, see above, you're not a criminal. Why should you be paying for rights that are only getting used by other people? People who are probably guilty in the first place. Let these rights slide, and you save money while the bad guys go to jail faster. That's a win-win. Just let it go.
As far as things that are "cruel" or "unusual," that’s only a judgment call. Who's to say what's unusual? People drown all the time, so making someone feel like they’re drowning isn't unusual at all. It’s everyday as a bowl of oatmeal. I suppose you could think that putting drugs in someone that stop their heart is a little odd, but really that's like one of those medical mistakes. You hear about those on the news all the time. Besides, when we talk about this stuff, we’re really talking about something that's quite rare and happens mostly to… what's the right word these days? People of a certain skin tone. Swarthy people. Can we still say that? No chance you'd ever need this right. Let it go.
Oh, and all that stuff about needing permission to take a peek in people's homes and cars, and suitcases, and under their clothes, and up their… well, you know. Honestly now, what kind of sense did that make in the first place? If you give people a chance to hide things, that's just what they'll do. If you want to know the truth, you have to catch people by surprise. Then you'll really know what they're about. Do you want to fly sitting next to some stranger if that stranger hasn't been inspected down to the last unmentionable bit? Of course you don’t. I can’t understand how this got to be a right in the first place. Let it go.
It's just like that "secure in their persons" thing. What does that even mean? I can tell you what it doesn't mean. Because obviously if you have a darling little dot-baby inside you, that's like having a whole other person down there, and in that case that person gets all the rights and you don't really have any left, because that would be like cheating, like double-dipping, and serves you right for getting someone else's DNA smeared all over yours. Wait, I don't really mean you. You'd never get yourself in such a situation, or even know someone like that. And even if you did, that's not the kind of right you’d ever want to use. Let it go.
Of course I've seen those people on TV. Unseemly, is what it is. Unbecoming and ungrateful. Marching around the capitol, complaining like that over such a little thing. Don’t they know that America is the can-do land of rugged individuals? Running around together and leaning on other people for help… that’s just weak. Plus they’re interfering with good public servants who are only trying to save your money and keep your taxes low. That's like – and I really hate to use this word – it's like treason. People crying about that right to assembly, that right to speech, that right to redress (and isn't that a funny word?) people like that are what's holding this country down. You know we can't be competitive if we let people use those rights. You don't hear about people using these things in China, do you? No you do not. At least, not for long. These selfish people who want a better life for themselves and their kids must really hate America. Not like you. You want a job, and if you know what's good for you, you'd better just let it go.
After all, it's not like any of those things were important. Not as long as you can go out and buy yourself a new rifle and plenty of ammo. "Cling," they say. How insulting is that? You don't cling to a gun. It's not like a teddy bear you hold onto in the dark. It's not some darn lollypop that you give to kids to keep them busy while you're doing something important. Cling. That shows what they know. This is a gun, the best and most important thing there is. If you're smart you'll buy another one before some coward tries to stop you. And really, I'd like to see them try.
After all, so long as you have that gun, they wouldn't dare touch your rights!