I just completed 30 days of TFFN that was not of my choosing. This is the only site I ever have problems with and I have no idea why. Thirty days ago, I could not longer comment, write diaries or log on. I could only lurk.
iI went through 9 months of that before and I read about others having the problem and switching to google chrome which worked. That period ended just shortly before DK4 started being tested. My trying to do it made me feel that I was never going to be successful working this site and I was sick and tired-- of being sick and tired of the pie fights. Next my story of internet roam.
I had decided once before in my life to give up everything political because I could not see where you could accomplish anything unless you were rich or famous. (Thank you, Wisconsin for changing my mind again.) I felt it had taken this site years to even get to some kind of consensus about what the real problems are: which is first and foremost and always follow the money. Second, as long as money rules the paradigm there is no change and we have already lost that fight. This site has not come to that conclusion yet.
Now that we can identify most of the basic problems; the lack, on a whole, of any solutions drives me crazy.
Many of us old DFH, after Kent State, made the decision that we would have to change society one relationship at a time. And I think many of us worked at it. I know I did until 1988, that was my year of my personal final big push and then I quit to take care of my own family and my own soul.
This time I did not have the money for workshops etc. or the desire because they have essentially failed too. All of the community foundation programs that I know of, like Scott Peck's, have all failed to gain any traction within society as a whole. But this time, I had the internet--so I would seek the heavy duty spiritual sites on the internet.
I was amazed to find them exactly the same. Big pie fights over who is more spiritual or manifesting more correctly or more accurate with their channeling. One of the meanest threads, I have ever experienced was under a specifically spiritual thread in a spiritual forum in a spiritual website.
Yet, there were some incredibly brilliant and wonderful people who had a lot to contribute and a lot to teach. I began as a sponge. And then I began to incorporate and act on what I had learned. In a short period of time I got quite good at writing that way. Once I stopped absorbing and began reflecting, I became a huge target. I have spent six weeks in silence everywhere ruminating on that.
While I have written nothing here, I have read everything as usual and from an outsiders viewpoint as I often could not get past just being "main" which does not allow me to see the diaries.
The thing that kept me coming back for more was Wisconsin.
Most of these spiritual web sites are very small two or three thousand with about two thousand active members with most of the sites being driven by about a 100 people which seems par for the course everywhere. The one I liked the best and eventually will return to had 12 monitors and 3 admins for a little over 2000 people. My observation is that they are as much part of the problem as any solution. I have specifically written there that this huge site has gotten a long quite well for years without them.
From my perspective, this wailing and gnashing of teeth for monitors is a waste of time. The simple solution is for everyone to act like adults. That is done by both modeling and gentle confrontation. If that fails, then specific dealing with the problem. I tried it and it works. But it has a price. It is that target thing.
What I did was lay down a body of work trying to say this is who I am. And I put my weaknesses up first and then my agendas. My observations are that people who want to be leaders--usually are not and should not be. People who identify the problem and then try to apply solutions and get things to actually work---they are the ones people should follow. Leadership by merit, which is what this country had on a whole, when I was growing up.
Trust, and the lack of it, is the swamp we are all navigating. I was for Hilliary until she started exaggerating things she had actually done. My biggest deal for a leader in any form period---is can I trust them? I put everything behind Obama because I trusted him to say what he meant and mean what he said. He has flushed all that down the toilet.
The issue of trust and its lack is everywhere. It is like show me and even then I don't know if I will believe you. But we are now at the point of such badness, that people are willing to listen more.
I have not written a lot of things because my beginnings showed me people were not willing to listen. And my entire story is so bizarre, or was, that I felt no one would believe me. Now everything is so bizarre and so fast, that if you have context, you now have a chance. So I am going to try again.
So I would like to talk about trust here as a community. Verbally banging is getting us no where. If you want to change the world, you have to change yourself. It is possible to just stop being rude and loud for the same reasons and the same way you stop smoking.
So what if we make mistakes? There is diarist here that I really like and I almost always rec who made a Hillary mistake. To make a point, there was excessive exaggeration for which time out was given. But the return, to my knowledge, we are to pretend the event never happened. I never saw an acknowledgment or an apology or an amends or a promise to never do it again.
This diarist writes a lot about fraud which is basically misrepresentation. Since this incident, I have not seen any of the facts of a diary distorted. They are usually well known to those who read a lot and they are usually linked. But there remains a resentment. It feels like the pot calling the kettle black.
So is admitting a mistake weakness? If they paid their price--and this was all pretty public-- should this resentment be forever? If they were a politician would they be done? Should they?
We are all having a means justifies the end discussion. I am one of the means is the end. You are what you do no matter what the reason. I can still be friendly. I can still rec you. I am never going to vote for you and I don't want you front paged, but that does not seem to be the issue for a diarist but we are acting like it is.
In college when I read some of the things that Nixon had read into the record of the Congress or addressed himself--I made the decision never to vote for him for even dog catcher. That has never changed and that decision was always rights. He gambled and won that most people never had access to the congressional records. Today, thank the goddess, we all do if we choose to.
I would prefer not to vote for Obama but I will. I now understand I am no longer voting for the lesser of two evils but I am voting for time. Time to learn more from Wisconsin and time to tell more people how to do it.
Time for it to sink into people's head---that there is never a time when you can go about your life and ignore politics. Politics are ugly and dirty and most of us would rather live our lives. But the people seeking political power simply don't care about our lives at all. In the past, we could not see that for sure. Now we can.
We now will all have to spend a certain amount of time behaving like citizens and patriots--like Invisibe Woman and Mr. Fantastic and their Wisconsin cohorts--because not doing so is going to cost us--money and choices in our lives. To do that we have to all be adults and monitor our own behavior. Sheeple are herded by dogs with fleas. People who need people and recognize their connection to other people need to be civil, patient, and friendly, other wise we are all going off the cliffs.