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Since the Rapture is undeniably upon us this coming Saturday I thought it my civic duty to help the heavenly-bound populace take full advantage of the event with a weeklong cavalcade of thoughtful hints n' tips.

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Comment Preferences

    •  I'm having a party. (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      ExStr8, Cenobyte

      The invitation states that, "As you're NOT going anywhere on May 21, come along and have some fun...." We're going to eat pork and wear cotton/poly blends and really kick it up.

      •  shatnez is linen wool blends (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        nzanne

        if you're going to violate a commandment - do it properly. :P

        Don't forget the male pagan temple prostitutes dressed as women!  

        You should have a seafood buffet as well.  Catfish, oysters, scallops, shrimp cocktail, lobster, steaks dripping with butter - spend the extra to get kosher steaks.

        And we sail and we sail and we never see land, just the rum in the bottle and a pipe in my hand...

        by Mortifyd on Mon May 16, 2011 at 01:13:48 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

    •  This is not a diary and making fun of religion (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Shakludanto

      should be "off limits" here on DKos regardless of your religious beliefs or non (Atheist)-respect others.

      "No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar." Abraham Lincoln

      by appledown on Mon May 16, 2011 at 09:48:10 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  I don't think it's making fun (0+ / 0-)

        of religion so much as making fun of a bunch of people who fervently believe that something preposterous - the arrival of the rapture this Saturday - is real.

        So he says to me, do you wanna be a BAD boy? And I say YEAH baby YEAH! Surf's up space ponies! I'm makin' gravy WITHOUT THE LUMPS! HAAA-ha-ha-ha!!!

        by Cenobyte on Mon May 16, 2011 at 11:59:53 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

  •  Glenn Beck say the rapture is at hand (1+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    ExStr8

    If that was true ,why is he continuing to build his heaven on earth with his million, this guy has made million exploiting  people in america, Beck do not know the hell the average american go through everyday ,while he continue to rack in his million

  •  Sorry, as a Christian, I think (3+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    AnakinSkywalker, appledown, SF Cato

    These anti-Rapture diaries are bordering on the petty and trollish.

    Sure, the Rapture ain't coming Saturday, but DailyKos should be respectful, no matter what their religion or lack of religion. I think it's OK, however, to shame the people who try to milk money out of gullible people by setting up false end-dates.

    Personally, I don't care what people believe; I try to present myself as a good example of Christianity, by being tolerant of other peoples' religions. After all, that's the example that I take from Jesus.

    •  I think its also OK to shame (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Statusquomustgo, Cenobyte

      people who say shit they absolutely know can't possibly be true in the natural world. but only in their imaginations, and furthermore if they do actually believe it they are suffering from a delusional disorder and should be guided into treatment.

      So shame stupidity, suggest treatment.

      This diary does "A".

      I'm good with that.

    •  The subject of the Rapture is inherently (4+ / 0-)

      exclusionary, and those of us who are non-religious and yet consider ourselves to be good persons, are irked by the concept. I'm reminded of the joke, St. Peter is showing a number of new arrivals around the palace of heaven. At one point gestures everybody to be very quiet, and they tiptoe down a long hallway. When they're through the door at the end, one fellow asks what was that all about? St Peter says "Oh, that's the Mormons, and they think they're the only ones here"

      •  The Bible is full of metaphor, (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        SF Cato

        and it's up to the reader to determine what's metaphor and what's meant literally.

        I think the Rapture is metaphorical. It ain't up to us humans to determine who goes to Heaven and who doesn't.

        Also, if you're a good person, I already consider you at least half-way to being Christian, according to Luke 10. It sounds like the set-up to a joke, but it's there: (paraphrased) A lawyer asks Jesus, "How can I get into Heaven?" Jesus breaks it down into two commandments, "1. Love God. 2. Love other people." So, the way I figure, if you're doing #2, you're halfway there. Note, he didn't even mention himself as being necessary for salvation.

        Yes, it makes me annoyed and sad when some Christians get an "Us versus Them" mentality like they are saved and others are not, like it's up to them. It's not.

    •  Too much respect and tolerance (4+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      ExStr8, elborba, Statusquomustgo, egarratt

      is what got us into the sorry state we enjoy today. No, I am a free person, and my rights are protected by law, and I have no residual respect for any of the organized religions, and I think they are increasingly, plainly fairy tales made up in a less illuminated time. They should be mocked, jeered and derided into non existence.

      •  Intolerant people are jerks. (0+ / 0-)

        Probably one of the few things I'm intolerant of! :-D

        •  Well (2+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          ExStr8, Shakludanto

          why is "tolerance" of an idea or institution a virtue in it's own right? Isn't intolerance of a noxious thing the greater virtue? This is not personal to you. I know plenty of good christians, but in terms of biting my tongue out of some "respect" for religion, the time for that is passed.

          •  Well, you certainly don't need to be tolerant (0+ / 0-)

            of an idea.

            But other people have feelings and convictions, especially the low-information people that are being duped out of their money. They deserve more pity than scorn.

            The ones facilitating lies for their own monetary gain or power-trips twisting the name of God deserve scorn and worse. I think you're right in being angry towards them.

            What would Jesus do? Jesus was pissed off at these kind of predatory manipulators, and gave them a piece of his mind! So, I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

    •  We willingly play right into Repub Fundie hands (0+ / 0-)

      I agree.  Folks who think the rapture is on Saturday have been seriously misguided by leaders who know better or -- if they read the Bible seriously -- should know better.  Any leader who knows the day despite the warnings of Matthew 24:36 is saying he or she (mostly he) is more in on the secret than Jesus.  Whew!  That's a pretty heavy burden.  

      But given this misdirection, we should be sympathetic and try to reason with these folks, letting them know they are being sold a bill of goods, rather than making fun.  By doing so, Repub fundies get to talk about how godless and craven we are.  The proposed rapture day will soon be forgotten or explained away, but the hatred and hurt projected toward Demos for their perceived ridicule of this and other matters will last a long time.  Truman was the last Demo who was able to call himself a Christian without everyday Repubs snickering.  Looks like that will be the case for at least another 59 years.

      Sorry if I got on a soapbox just then, but I really feel we've got to stop it.

  •  Is it too late to get in? (1+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    ExStr8

    If I were to stop paying my taxes, kick and or hit a poor gay person and buy a gun could I still make the list?

  • Uber Alles Blog
  • by Uberdude on Mon May 16, 2011 at 09:36:01 AM PDT

  •  Respect for stupid is The Tea Party! (1+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    elborba

    If people act stupid, they get called stupid--
    calling it "religion" is no defense

    Stonewall was a RIOT!

    by ExStr8 on Mon May 16, 2011 at 09:47:51 AM PDT

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    ExStr8, Detroit Mark, George3

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