We've reached the point in the presidential primary season where each new week brings another GOP debate; the most recent one co-sponsored by CNN and the Tea Party Express.
After introducing the candidates Jersey Shore-style, moderator Wolf Blitzer got right into the life or death questions—and some of the responses were so far out there that even Rick Perry's well-coiffed head was spinning.
Michele Bachmann, looking to reclaim her spot in the top-tier, went on the attack against the Texas governor, landing a solid blow.
But her decision to double-down resulted in the sudden onset of mental retardation, and enabled Jim to live to fight another day.
Morning lineup:
Meet the Press: Former President Bill Clinton; Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY); Roundtable: Former Michigan Gov. Jennifer Granholm (D), GOP Strategist Alex Castellanos, Mark Halperin (TIME) and Helene Cooper (New York Times).
Face the Nation: Former President Bill Clinton; Former Vice President Dick Cheney.
This Week: Former President Bill Clinton; Former British Prime Minister Tony Blair; Executive Chairman of Google Eric Schmidt; Roundtable: George Will (Washington Post), Cokie Roberts (ABC News), Jonathan Karl (ABC News) and Presidential Historian Michael Beschloss.
Fox News Sunday: Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI); Presidential Candidate Herman Cain; Roundtable: Paul Gigot (Wall Street Journal), Former Sen. Evan Bayh (D-IN), Bill Kristol (Weekly Standard) and Juan Williams (Fox News).
State of the Union: Sen. Dick Durbin (D-IL); Sen. Lindsay Graham (R-SC); Former CBO Director Alice Rivlin; Former CBO Director Douglas Holtz-Eakin; Israeli Ambassador to the U.S. Michael Oren; Palestinian Chief Representative to the U.S. Maen Areikat; Reliable Sources: George Washington University Professor Steve Roberts; Michelle Cottle (Daily Beast); Jeff Zeleny (New York Times); Ben Smith (Politico).
The Chris Matthews Show: Katty Kay (BBC); Kelly O'Donnell (NBC News); Michael Duffy (TIME); Major Garrett (National Journal).
Fareed Zakaria GPS: CEO of General Electric Jeffrey Immelt; Elliot Abrams (Council on Foreign Relations); Columbia University Professor Rashid Khalidi; Gideon Rose (Foreign Affairs Magazine); Bret Stephens (Wall Street Journal).
Evening lineup:
60 Minutes will feature: an interview with Medal of Honor recipient Dakota Meyer (preview); a report on the latest "spy cam" techniques being used by wildlife filmmakers to show animals in their natural habitats (preview); and, an interview with Dallas Cowboys Owner/General Manager Jerry Jones (preview).
On Comedy Central:
Jon Stewart and Daily Show correspondent Kristen Schaal delved into the nether-regions of Michele Bachmann's mind.
The Daily Show
Monday: Pre-empted
Tuesday: Author Ron Suskind
Wednesday: Indiana Gov. Mitch Daniels (R)
Thursday: Former Michigan Gov. Jennifer Granholm (D)
And Stephen Colbert reported on the latest developments regarding "Clipgate" — President Obama's scandalous use of a paper clip.
The Colbert Report
Monday: Pre-empted
Tuesday: Author Jeffrey Kluger (D)
Wednesday: Author Daniel Yergin
Thursday: Author/Radio Host Tavis Smiley
Elsewhere:
Donald Trump's consigliere made Republicans an offer they can't refuse.
Donald Trump’s top political adviser, Michael Cohen, told ABC News on Thursday that Trump’s endorsement could propel one of the Republican presidential candidates all the way to the nomination.
Cohen warned, however, that if Trump is unhappy with the quality of the GOP field, he would run as an independent — a move that Cohen said would be a "catastrophe for the Republican Party."
"If he does get behind whoever the candidate may be, what’s going to happen is that individual will basically lock up the Republican nomination," Cohen said on ABC’s "Top Line."
Cohen called Trump the "godfather of politics" and said that the real estate mogul and reality television star’s die-hard fans will "follow him to wherever he goes."
Meanwhile:
Pat Roberston, spokesman for the One True God, argued that Nancy Reagan would've been well within her rights had she divorced St. Ronnie.
Religious broadcaster Pat Robertson told his "700 Club" viewers that divorcing a spouse with Alzheimer's is justifiable because the disease is "a kind of death."
During the portion of the show where the one-time Republican presidential candidate takes questions from viewers, Robertson was asked what advice a man should give to a friend who began seeing another woman after his wife started suffering from the incurable neurological disorder.
"I know it sounds cruel, but if he's going to do something, he should divorce her and start all over again, but make sure she has custodial care and somebody looking after her," Robertson said.
And in other marital news:
Todd Palin angrily denounced the claims made in Joe McGinniss' forthcoming book which portray his wife as something of a player.
Sarah Palin's husband on Thursday called a book critical of his family "disgusting lies, innuendo and smears" as the former Alaska governor's camp sought to discredit a racy biography that includes allegations of infidelity and drug use.
As Sarah Palin weighs a White House bid, her husband released a statement seeking to blunt the fallout from Joe McGinniss' "The Rogue: Searching for the Real Sarah Palin." Palin allies also released another denial from the man alleged to have carried on an affair with Sarah Palin.
"This is a man who has been relentlessly stalking my family to the point of moving in right next door to us to harass us and spy on us to satisfy his creepy obsession with my wife," Todd Palin wrote of McGinniss. "His book is full of disgusting lies, innuendo and smears. Even The New York Times called this book 'dated, petty,' and that it 'chases caustic, unsubstantiated gossip.'"
May the farce be with you.
- Trix