As soon as the following event happened on Thursday morning, my urgent sense of coming to Daily Kos to diary it made me realize that this fucking place still invades my consciousness, pretty much 24/7.
Damn you. DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL! /shakes fist
( :P )
So have a few laughs at my expense, will ya?
I have a part-time job right now, but I've been actively searching for another one (either part-time or full-time, whatever will help pay the bills) for quite some time. Recently, I stepped up my search by applying to a reputed temp agency in the area. This is, supposedly, one of those kickass temp agencies that, ya know, actually finds you work.
I apply online, take all their silly tests, and have an interview scheduled for Thursday. I'm all hopped up on caffeine and I go in there in a goofy ass mood, and am uncharacteristically nervous for some odd reason. Whatever. I'm hyper and ready to work! Sign me the fuck up, people!
So the lady goes over my history and my skill set and my test scores and tells me she has two possible jobs for me. One is at some boring insurance agency, and will I take another test and send her my resume for that one? Sure, I say. No problem.
The second temp job is more immediate and is for Saturday. I'm all excited by this. I could get paid next week!, I think. The lady tells me that this position requires me to "bring some of my own materials". I ask her what the job is, and she says, "It's a demonstration." Because I am me and not some ignorant schlub, my mind immediately settles on Occupy Wall Street. I imagine that I have to make signs and shit to, like, demonstrate. From there, the conversation went downhill really fast.
Me: So where is this supposed to take place?
Lady: Either at Sam's Club or Walmart. I'm not sure which one.
Me (thinking Jesse LaGreca is maybe going to be there? And wtf are they demonstrating about, besides the fact that Walmart is evil and should be destroyed by only the power of my immense mind?): Uhm. I'm a bit confused. What are they demonstrating there?
Lady: Food.
Me (is Jill Richardson going to be there, too? Are they demonstrating because Walmart doesn't carry organic? Too much processed food there, right? Is it a Velveeta sort of demonstration, anti-Kraft mac and cheese thingee?): Huh. OK. Do you happen to know if this demonstration is liberal or conservative?
Lady (staring at me like I have 3 heads): What?!
Me (perplexed by lady's 3-headed monster look): Well, I think I should know what I'm demonstrating ...
Lady (sternly): It's a food demonstration, Shiz. Preparing food for people and handing them out to customers in Pixie cups.
Me (the wheels finally clicking in place, dumbass, nice job!): OOOOOHHHHHH! I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry. I'm kind of a political person and my mind went someplace completely different. Sorry about that.
It's Saturday. So you can guess how it turned out for me, but that's only because I didn't have/couldn't find a card table. Damn you card table manufacturers! /shakes fist
So thanks for fucking up my thinking, Daily Kos! Now some lady in Centennial, CO thinks I am an idiot, and it's all your fault! :)