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It's time for SPARK - thank Jeebus I've got the next 2 weeks off version! :D In case you get that 20 - year - old fruitcake in your stocking, here are some helpful hints on what to do with it. The aforementioned helpful hints might help if you find this item in your stocking as well! EEEeeeWWwwww! File this story about a beloved holiday classic under "Ya' Learn Something New Every Day!" :) Finally, we'll end with a "Teh Cute; It Burnz!" item.

Let's Countdown...

#5 "GOP Warriors" AKA "Oh What a Lovely War" - Since our military obligations in Iraq officially ended yesterday, last night's MENSA meeting was all about creaming in their jeans about the possibility of bomb - bomb - bomb - bomb...bombing Iran. And, nearly a year out of the POTUS election, a lot of folk are already sick of it.  SC Gov. Nikki Haley endorsed Mittens today; she'll be tea bagging him tomorrow. ;D Mittens is also taking credit for Senator Wyden's caving into the Rep. Paul Ryan plan to kill Medicare. Only Rep. Paul last night expressed any misgivings about the aforementioned bombing of Iran; well, Rep. Paul doesn't want us to be anywhere for any reason. However, everyone else in the damn room is ready for more shock & awe; there's gotta be a happy medium in that somewhere! $hit, look who I'm talking about, though - not bloody likely! Mittens accused President Obama of running down our military on purpose. Newt's ready to put the kibosh on those darn federal courts. Governor Secession wants to be Tim Tebow. Mittens may have "enhanced" the details of where he stayed during his missionary work; he really lived in a sparkin' mansion with a cook & everything! Nia Malika Henderson, poor thing, gets GOBP duty again. I wouldn't say I'm sick of the election, but I'm sure as $hit sick of these MENSA meetings! Begin the damn primaries, and let's get a MENSA nominee already! Having said that, I think the GOBP primaries will drag on & on & on & on. The GOBP is propping up war with Iran to boost their Israel BFF creds to reach the evangelical bat$hit vote. Uh, Ms. Nia, FDR just tried to pack SCOTUS; he didn't actually succeed. Not to nit - pick...just saying. Our Great Orange Satanic Leader's in da' house! Newt's ramping up his Newtness while he's still in the lead to sell more books & DVDs, so he's saying whatever the spark he wants. Tea baggers in SC are not happy with their Governor's endorsement of Mittens. ;D I'm crying a river - really! No, no...I'm not. :D Keith & Markos had a little discussion over Rep. Ron Paul's sanity - such as it is! HA!

#4 "Get Off the Pipeline" - Let the hostage taking resume! The GOBP will let the payroll tax cut holiday crash & burn unless President Obama makes a decision about the Keystone XL pipeline within 60 days. I am having a not - so - good feeling of deja vu all over again. The GOBP are still propping up the Keystone pipeline jobs creation myth while actual honest - to - goodness possible MENSA folk are saying the GOBP line is a bunch of bull pucky. Joe Romm gets to talk pipelines. Some Hill Dems are saying this development is a tempest in a tea pot; I don't trust the Hill Dems that are saying this. Mr. Romm thinks the GOBP is hoping President Obama DOES reject the pipeline in order for them to keep up the "President Obama is killing jobs" memo. There is also the distinct possibility that President Obama will let this Keystone Pipeline be built.

"Time Marches On!" - A little baby & a little doggie are digging on each other a lot. :) A penguin in Japan brings its owner a newspaper. A horse walked into a bar. No...really...a horse walked into a bar!

#3 "Occupy Bradley Manning" AKA "Manning's Day in Court" - Private Bradley Manning saw some court action today for the first time since his incarceration a long damn time ago. He's the alleged source of all the WikiLeaks stuff, remember? He looks OK to me for a guy supposedly in solitary confinement for however long. If Private Manning's convicted of all the crimes with which he's charged, he could spend the rest of his life in prison. A lot of Occupy folk were at the site of today's hearing - including Dan Choi. Private Manning's 24th birthday is tomorrow. The presiding officer might not be the most impartial person to be leading the thing; his "day job" is with the DOJ when he's not doing National Guard stuff. Yea, I think I'd be asking for someone else, too, if I was representing Private Manning. Daniel Ellsberg's talking Bradley Manning; Mr. Ellsberg knows a thing or 2 about government leaking. Manning family members say he's been under lights for 23 out of 24 hours, and his only exercise is walking figure 8s in a separate room. OK, I ask this question in all seriousness with no snark intent whatsoever; I really don't know, so I'm asking. Why is prolonged isolation considered torture? If I had my choice between prolonged isolation and, say, oh, waterboarding or shock or being beaten to a bloody pulp, I think I'll take the isolation! Mr. Ellsberg thinks Private Manning's being pressured to fork over information about Julian Assange, and that's why he's being treated the way he's allegedly being treated.

WPITW - Sheriff Joe is claiming he's the victim of a witch hunt after the DOJ officially said he's broken the law concerning his treatment of minorities; he compared it to Pearl Harbor. Rep. Alan West compared "the Democrat Party" to Joseph Goebels. The CEO of Lowe's is in the "gold medal" position again. There was a protest at a Patterson, NJ Lowe's today.

#1 "Bill Hicks" - Bill Hicks would've been 50 today. There's FCC - approved Bill Hicks stuff out there? Shall we count the beeps? :) There would've been no Bill Hicks without George Carlin, and there would've been no George Carlin without Lenny Bruce; Lenny Bruce died too young, too.

Originally posted to CityLightsLover on Fri Dec 16, 2011 at 06:12 PM PST.

Also republished by Friends of Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow, ClassWarfare Newsletter: WallStreet VS Working Class Global Occupy movement, Electronic America: Progressives Film, music & Arts Group, and Pink Clubhouse.

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