I just returned from helping a friend with a small business do year-end inventory and found that I had received a gift subscription to DailyKos. I'm astounded. How did my name ever get on the list and how on earth can I live up to it?
Yes, our family is struggling financially (I've been unemployed since July) and the subsequent strain has caused a huge uptick in my PTSD-related anxiety to the point I've developed breathing problems and have to have an inhaler. So a subscription is something I certainly can't afford right now and is very much appreciated. But why me?
I visit DailyKos at least once a day and do my best to recommend diaries and comments that I think others should see. I try and challenge my unconscious assumptions and refine my progressive outlook through what is offered by others on this site. Once in a great while I'm able to participate in a comment thread or join in a community effort. I may find comfort in experiencing like-minded people but I have not found my voice.
Is the role of audience valuable? Obviously someone thought so. I can't really understand it and so have to fall back on the belief that "accepting the gift honors the giver". I'm terrible at saying thank you and usually rely on chocolate to speak for me (homemade centers, hand-dipped in a special blend of dark chocolate). But this gift was anonymous and I don't have an address.
Perhaps the assumption I need to challenge today is that "worthiness" is needed for good things to happen to you. Maybe I'm the poster child to explode a right-wing talking point? Now that's valuable!