Ominous Political Ad Announcer:
Can we risk an America run by [insert opponent's name]?
He clearly doesn't understand that America is built on hard work, not [insert opponent's previous occupation].
Sure, now he says he opposes [hot-button-issue, news clip] but he used to support [hot-button-issue, grainy footage with dead politician].
[Opponent's name] is called [negative adjective] for America and an [apocalyptic noun] for our future.
He and his organization [adverb] attack, because he is an [adjective] [synonym for liar].
He claims to be an [positive noun], but is nothing more than a [adjective] [body part] [negative noun].
Around here, that [down home metaphor] just don't [verb].
Better ask yourself: Can America risk [insert opponent's name]?
Paid for by [uplifting verb] Our Future, another Super PAC with so much [expletive] secret money it's [expletive] [adjective].