I am 68, not able to clean my house and have minimal money so Medicare pays for a housekeeper twice a week for me. My housekeeper is TJ, a young black man who is wonderful as a human being and as a housekeeper. He sometimes runs to stores for me when walking a long distance is a problem for me. This is an account of two of those incidents.
I had purchased a couple of pairs of shoes (on sale) at T.J. Maxx a week or so ago and had to return them. I gave TJ my receipt and bank card and he walked to the closest store, about half a mile away.
When he got there he spoke with a clerk who promptly accused him of bringing in shoes they don't sell and would only accept one pair on the return. She also accused him of switching the tags and would only credit one pair for $10.00. The other pair that she wouldn't accept was the ten dollar pair.
I called the store and raised the roof a bit. OK, I was livid. I finally went back to the store yesterday and got the rest of the refund. The older black manager apologized to me. I told him that the apology should be made to TJ, since he was the one who was virtually called a thief. So he gave me an apology for TJ.
Then he said he'd give me a $10 gift certificate for my inconvenience. I reminded him that I was not the one inconvenienced and that I would give the gift certificate to TJ.
The clerk was a black woman. I told the manager that I was shocked at first, then said that if you are a young black male in Chicago, you are automatically thought to be a thief, and that has to stop here and now. He assured me that the woman had been advised to stop acting that way in the store.
The second incident is more subtle. I asked him to go to the local Jewel store, about 3/4 of a mile away. Now when I go into the store and forget my Jewel card, the clerk automatically gives me the sale price.
If you are a young black man, apparently, this courtesy is not afforded to you. I will take this bill to the store and explain the world to them. But I have to get the energy to walk that distance.
I know these are not earthshaking incidents, at least not to us white folks. I HATE that. I hate that we go along with our ignorance, never or seldom knowing the consequences of the "little racisms". Oh, sure, we know about the chances of being stopped driving while black or getting a cab while black, or getting arrested because you might look like someone, but we don't see how every day and every way this hideous thing effects the lives of whole groups of people, some of whom we love or know.
It makes me so angry. It makes me cry. Tomorrow I will fight this, but today, I think I will just sit here and cry.
1:01 PM PT: You're welcome to you all for your kind comments, but I believe everyone who sees this kind of thing should stand up as well. I don't think I did anything that anyone else might do. I don't think I'm anything special. But thank you very much anyway.