Following up on Monday's frank discussion on guns, last night Stephen Colbert mocked the gun nuts buying up all the guns out there because they're paranoid that Obama will take them away.
MEGYN KELLY (3/23/2012): Gun sales have recently surged. Some say one reason is fears that an Obama re-election could usher in a new era of gun control regulations ... People are so worried, that top firearm manufacturer Sturm, Ruger & Co. is actually suspending new firearm orders because they say they cannot keep up.
Yes! The fear of not being able to buy guns has led to buying so many guns that now we can't buy any guns, just like we feared!! Oh, oh it's too simple, right? I know what you're thinking, Colbert's being irrational. Oh really?
It's happened before, in 2008, when people bought guns before Obama took office, because they knew he'd pass harsh gun regulations, which he didn't. And I will not fall for it again, Mr. President. Because we are one step ahead of where you are not planning to go.
The NRA has been trying to warn us about this for months!
WAYNE LAPIERRE (9/23/2011): In public, the President will remind us he's put off calls from his own party to renew the old Clinton gun ban. He hasn't pushed for new gun control laws. ... But it's a big fat stinking lie! ... It's all part of a massive Obama conspiracy to deceive voters and hide his true intentions: to destroy the Second Amendment in our country!
Yes, it is a vast conspiracy! And the total lack of evidence is all the evidence I need. Methinks he doth too little too much. And if he gets away with this, what other things he's shown no signs of doing will he do next?
For instance, he hasn't sold you into white slavery. Why not? You're attractive. You could totally satisfy a Russian kleptocrat. And I can't help but notice he has not seized all the Catholic Church's property and given it to the New Black Panther Party for them to run their reefer dens. Ergo, he will.
Video and full transcript below the fold.
Thank you for joining us for what might be the end of the republic. Now I have warned you for years that President Obama was hatching a secret plot to be re-elected. And now, folks, that plot has been exposed because of this whole election thing we're going through. Well, it is causing the appropriate level of panic.
MEGYN KELLY (3/23/2012): Gun sales have recently surged. Some say one reason is fears that an Obama re-election could usher in a new era of gun control regulations ... People are so worried, that top firearm manufacturer Sturm, Ruger & Co. is actually suspending new firearm orders because they say they cannot keep up.
Yes! The fear of not being able to buy guns has led to buying so many guns that now we can't buy any guns, just like we feared!! Oh, oh it's too simple, right? I know what you're thinking, Colbert's being irrational. Oh really?
It's happened before, in 2008, when people bought guns before Obama took office, because they knew he'd pass harsh gun regulations, which he didn't. And I will not fall for it again, Mr. President. Because we are one step ahead of where you are not planning to go.
The NRA has been trying to warn us about this for months!
WAYNE LAPIERRE (9/23/2011): In public, the President will remind us he's put off calls from his own party to renew the old Clinton gun ban. He hasn't pushed for new gun control laws. ... But it's a big fat stinking lie! ... It's all part of a massive Obama conspiracy to deceive voters and hide his true intentions: to destroy the Second Amendment in our country!
Yes, it is a vast conspiracy! And the total lack of evidence is all the evidence I need. Methinks he doth too little too much. And if he gets away with this, what other things he's shown no signs of doing will he do next?
For instance, he hasn't sold you into white slavery. Why not? You're attractive. You could totally satisfy a Russian kleptocrat. And I can't help but notice he has not seized all the Catholic Church's property and given it to the New Black Panther Party for them to run their reefer dens. Ergo, he will. And I don't even know the meaning of the word "ergo".
And folks, it's not just the certainty Obama will take away our guns that's driving up gun sales. It's the post-apocalyptic hellscape Obama will cause. As one firearms specialist told Fox News:
BRET JORDAN (3/22/2012): Personal handguns have had a steady rise since 2008. The kind of stuff that fits in your waistband when someone tries to steal your gas can.
Yes, we need our pistols to fight off the roving gangs who will come to steal our precious juice!
My God, they've already stolen it!!
It's the same reason I'm investing in personal helicopters, dirt children, and steel gimp masks.
So arm yourselves, America, or before you know it, we will all be ruled over by a sexy black lady with crazy blonde hair.
Mr. President, we don't need another hero.
We don't need to know the way home.
All we want is life beyooooooond Thunderdome.
And by the way, Mr. President, you can have my boomerang knife when you pry it from my cold dead fingers.
Stephen then covered the news that there may now be a
pill to cure racism.
He then reported on the latest gadget, a
Tacocopter, an unmanned drone to deliver tacos. (But as pgm 01
noted, the story is a
hoax.)
Meanwhile, Jon is still criticizing the media for their Trayvon Martin coverage, and focused on mocking Lawrence O'Donnell for asking questions to an empty chair after George Zimmerman lawyer Craig Sonner walked out.
He then had to give
props to Rick Santorum and Mitt Romney for calling out "bullshit" questions from reporters before turning a critical eye on Santorum's
"Obamaville" ad.
Sam Bee then covered the latest in the Israel/Palestine fight... a
local food co-op in Brooklyn discussing a boycott of Israeli products. Oy vey!
Stephen sat down with infamous
The Bell Curve author
Charles Murray to talk about his latest book in a very uncomfortable interview, while Jon interviewed Dogster.com's news editor
Maria Goodavage about her book
Soldier Dogs.