Ann Romney on Mitt Romney
Mitt will now issue preemptive non apologies:
I didn't realize all those workers we fired would be upset, we were too busy stuffing money into each others boxer shorts to consider the knock on effects. Ah youthful hijinks, such fun.
I didn't realize that Seamus would be subjected to air turbulence and noise, I just took his whimpering as a ploy to get attention. Put it down to the marijuana we were not smoking
Isn't a car lift for everyone? How is that flaunting my wealth. Ha ha you're just jealous, look stop standing there with your mouth open, its a joke. I'm unemployed dontcha know.
I'm just like you, like you want to be that is. Ha ha. You don't find that funny? Well excuse me for being Mr Insensitive.
You didn't understand what I meant to say even though I have just retroactively updated my advice. Well boo hoo to you too.
Breaking: Romney Campaign Update
Mr Romney reserves the right to retroactively retract any preemptive apology at any time.