Today I got a nice letter from the Governor of Wisconsin, Scott Walker. He's funny because he was asking me for money. Since I'm a public school teacher, and I already paid my "fair share" this year, I can't believe he doesn't have enough of my money already. But nonetheless, I will share some highlights from his malificent missive after the orangey thing.
Quote #1
"...the Big Government Labor Unions are seized by an OVERPOWERING URGE to return to the "Doyle Days"..." . [emphasis mine]
Sounds SEXY. I can't really recall an "overpowering urge" in response to Gov. Doyle. but if Scotty says it's true...
Quote #2
"With clenched fists [okay, guilty], obscene signs [naughty but I wouldn't call them obscene], screaming chants [my voice still isn't recovered from last Feb.] and un-Wisconsin like tactics [is there a handbook or something I missed?] , I'm being attacked with a ferocity that Wisconsinites have never seen before."
Now I know Scotty is too young to remember the Vietnam War protests in the 60’s, and he probably was too busy cheating elections at Marquette during the Apartheid protests in the 80's, but he should know that poking a badger in its hole is dangerous. They are truly ferocious animals. Didn't we all learn that in the 4th grade when we studied our great state?
Quote #3
“Arrogant [maybe] and hypocritical, the Madison Liberals have joined forces with the Out-Of State Union Bosses to make an example out of me for curbing their collective bargaining rights...” [emphasis all Scotty’s]
Two questions here: 1. Where do the Madison Liberals and the Out of State Union Bosses play? What game? I hope it’s hockey because I like to go to hockey games.
2. I think Scotty has some teacher issues. Did a teacher once ‘make an example out of him?’ Dunce hat? Naughty chair? Box of shame? Kicked out of college?
Quote #4
“…There is no lie our enemies won’t utter to win. But I don’t have anything to hide. The facts are my friends.”
Do I even have to comment? This comedy just writes itself.
And also I got another full-color mailer from congressman Duffy. Don't even get me started.