Friday, June 15 is Global Wind Day - a day to discover wind and its power to change the world. How better to celebrate the wind than to watch a kite dance on a breezy shoreline?
Unless you're of the Americans For Prosperity, New Jersey mindset. In that case, Global Wind Day is an effort by global environmentalists connected with the radical Party of European Socialists to indoctrinate and manipulate innocent children as props to advance their radical “renewable” energy schemes.
Really.
Because everyone knows that indoctrination starts with children flying kites.
The Sierra Club of New Jersey decided to gather on the beach at Ocean City and Asbury Park, bring kids and kites, and let everyone have fun. However, if you're paid by the Koch brothers, "fun" is merely a code word meaning "brainwash kids and then use them as props and human shields in their quest to foist their European-style, anti-free-market, globalist ‘green’ agenda on the world."
Consider similarities between kids and kites:
Kites and children have so much in common. For one thing, there's their beauty. Both are inherently gorgeous. For another, both are capable of soaring, one physically, the other spiritually.
Of course, "soaring" is merely slang for "a cult-like movement to force taxpayers to provide massive subsidies for on land, and the even more costly, offshore wind mills," per the ever zealous AFP.
Yes, Americans For Prosperity is now sinking to Westboro Baptist Church levels, protesting children flying kites at the beach. The Orwellian-named Liberty and Prosperity is already planning the resistance against the "ignorance, dishonesty, tyranny, and corruption" of an invading mass of kite-armed children:
We want to teach the truth. Can you join us on the Ocean City Boardwalk this Friday at noon? We need at least 20 people to (a) distribute literature, (b) display signs like “Enough Green Tyranny”, “Wind Energy = High Electric Bills”, “Veto RGGI Now!”, (c) display our symbolic wooden pikes draped with red liberty caps. Can you make a sign? Can you get a 4 foot to 6 foot pole (from any lumber store) along with a red “liberty” cap?
A side note: using the same logic allowing one to conclude that kite flying constitutes environmental indoctrination, the Liberty and Prosperity authors want it to be known that they're not being paid by the Koch brothers, but they are working closely with Americans For Prosperity. Which of course has nothing whatsoever to do with the Koch brothers, beyond its very existence.
Of course, Americans For Prosperity's real sleazy aim is for the politicization of wind: these protests will scare off children and their skittish parents from appreciating the wind at their backs. The kids need support. If you're in New Jersey, go to the beach:
June 15th is Global Wind Day and we need your help to get Governor Christie to move offshore wind forward. We'll be gathering at a beach near you for a kite-flying rally and celebration of NJ's offshore wind potential. Bring your family, friends and kites.
FREE kites to everyone who signs up online!
WHO: You, your friends and family
WHAT: Get Wind Em-Powered Kite Rally
WHEN: June 15th at 12 noon
WHERE: A beach near you
Ocean City -- 10th Street Beach
Asbury Park -- Asbury and Ocean Avenue Beach Entrance
Bring your camera. You might be lucky enough to photograph a teabagger ensuring that kite-flying children grow up in an ever-warming world gone haywire. Or a well organized army of kite-wielding children scaring off hopelessly mismatched lobbyists.
Go fly a kite!