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Here's a script for what to say to your idiot relatives or neighbors at the BBQ next week...Follow me below the gastropod...

THEM:  "I am so freakin' mad, I'm movin' to Canada!"

YOU:  (remember, don't laugh!  remain calm)  
"what part of the bill don't you like?  (always start any conversation with this--it gets to specifics and lets you score early points.  but don't take a breath!  don't let them into the conversation! QUICK! you start asking about the specifics!)
(you continuing)
..."what part of the bill don't you like?  i'm sure that you want to keep your child on your plan until your child is 26.  you like the part where they close the medicare donut hole?
how about the part where there's no cap on lifetime benefits?  or the part that allows for pre-existing conditions to be covered?  that's really a big positive change!"

THEM:  "those things are ok.  we can keep those.  it's the commie mandate!"

YOU:  "so, you want what's in the bill.  you just don't want to pay for any of it?"

THEM:  "They can't make me.  that's unconstitutional!"

YOU:  "how is this particular fine or fee or tax any different from any other fine or fee or tax you have to pay the government for for a particular service?"

THEM:  "i don't know.  It just is unconstitutional."

YOU:  "there are lots of things this country MANDATES.  they mandate that i have to pay taxes for war weapons.  they mandate that i have to pay for tax subsidies and loopholes to a whole host of things that i don't support.  
but getting back to the plan...
did you know that this healthcare plan is exactly the plan that the conservative Heritage foundation came up with.  it was their health plan for the whole country, not just a state version like romneycare.
so, why do you think conservatives don't like it now, when they are the ones who drew it up?"

THEM:  "i don't know."

YOU:  "you believe in personal responsibility, right?  you do want to take personal responsibility for your healthcare.

THEM:  "of course!  i just don't want to pay for the freeloaders!"

YOU:  "well, you already are!  every time some person who has "chosen" to be uninsured goes to the emergency room, you are paying!  the hospital just makes you pay it in your bill or in your premiums."  

THEM:  "That's not right!"

YOU:  "but let's get back to the ACA.   you want to have the benefits that are in the bill.  if the bill is not paid for, then it would run up the deficit, like Bush did when he did not raise taxes for the prescription drug benefit. Why do you think that they passed a bill that added billions to the budget without raising revenues to pay for it?  That was  the republican congress, the same group that screams about spending?"

THEM:  "I didn't know that.  I thought the debt was all Obama's fault."

YOU:  "but ...getting back to the healthcare bill...(say that every time they stray.)
it sounds like the republicans want folks to be freeloaders in the ER or "a freerider."  that's what mitt Romney said in MA:  'Romneycare gets rid of the FREERIDERS.' "

THEM:  "Obama's from Kenya.  and he's a Muslin."

YOU:  "Let's eat!"

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