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Any confirmation that Paterno was involved in the decision not to report the shower assault won't matter to 1966 Penn State alumnus Michael S. Kirschner, a Bryn Mawr businessman and who chaired the Paterno Library board.

"To me it doesn't, because I love the man. I learned from him, and I can walk from my home in Philadelphia to Penn State in the footsteps of mistakes I've made," Kirschner said. "The legacy of those of us who believed in him will not be tarnished. No matter what."

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Forgive this screed - but I'm about to go OFF!


No matter what, Mr. Kirschner?  No matter that he covered up child sexual abuse for over a decade?  No matter that little 10, 11, 12, 13 year old boys were forced to give oral sex to Jerry Sandusky, forced to suck his dick?  (while Paterno looked the other way) No matter that they were anally raped by a 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60 year old man?  (while Paterno looked the other way)  No matter that they were either anally raped or forced to suck this old man's dick sometimes 30, 40, 50, 100 times? (while Paterno looked the other way) No matter that Sandusky pscyhologically abused some of these boys, withdrawing love, abandoning them when they no longer fit his needs? (while Paterno looked the other way) No matter that he left little 11 year old boys to deal with the aftermath of being sodomized?  (while Paterno looked the other way) No matter that these boys, having been abused for many years, suffer today from the affects of that abuse and will so for the rest of their lives? (while Paterno looked the other way) No matter that while they were being forced to do this, McQueary, Paterno, Schultz, Curley, Spanier, saw Sandusky bring boy after boy to event after event, tail gate after tail gate, game after game?  And said NOTHING?  None of this matters to you, Mr. Kirschner, because you want to hold onto some nice memories?

Fuck you, Mr. Kirschner.  Do you know how many times I had to hear as a little girl about someone's reputation being more important than the effects of a child being raped?  Do you know what it's like to be told that you don't matter?  That the reputation of the family is more important than your well being?   Fuck you and every god-damned Joe Paterno supporter.  He is no better than the fucking asshole who raped these little boys.  He may not have stuck his dick in them but he certainly turned his head while it happened.  He and his compadres are personally responsible for every victim that came after 1998 - and there were many of them, Mr. Kirschner.  Four that we know of.

Fuck you
Fuck him
Fuck Spanier
Fuck Curley
Fuck Schultz
Fuck Sandusky

While you defend your sainted Joe Pa "NO MATTER WHAT" - let me share with you what happens to little kids who are raped - and people do nothing.

I spent all of my childhood escaping.  When he was raping me or performing oral sex on me, I used to have out of body experiences.  I used to imagine that I was flying - far above the ground, looking down on the trees or the lake or the dirt road at camp.  It was a way to get out of my body and away from the ugliness that was occurring.  This still is a part of my psyche today.  When things get tense, I dissociate.  When I read your comment, all I wanted to do was to fly away.  You triggered me so badly with your "No matter What" statement.  

Because what you're saying is that no matter what Joe Paterno did, you will stand by him.  Can you look at your children/grandchildren/great-grandchildren and tell them the same?  I know you don't know these boys who were raped while Joe Paterno looked the other way.  I understand that you guys probably don't run in the same circles.  But these were children, Mr. Kirschner.  Little boys.  Who liked to run and play and laugh with their friends.  Can you honestly look at whatever 10, 11, 12 year old little boy is in your life today and say "no matter what, even if you were one of Sandusky's victims and My Joe Pa was part of the cover-up, I'd still stand behind him."

I don't think you can, Mr. Kirschner.  

Oh and when I got older, and I told, and he stopped raping me?  Oh, that's when the real fun began.  See, I hated myself.  I continued the abuse on myself.  Low (NO) self-esteem, weight issues, sex issues.  Not only had I been a convenient orifice for him to stick his dick into, but I was also told BY THOSE WHO KNEW AND DID NOTHING that it didn't matter.  I was expendable.  I was worthless.  Did anyone care about my well being?  I'd get over it, grow out of it.  "The past is the past"  "That was so long ago," oh and my favorite? "What did you want us to do?"

Here's a hint...YOU SHOULD HAVE FUCKING STOPPED IT.  And for those questioning what to do today - If you suspect or have an inkling, hell if you get a shiver up your leg, call the fucking police.  Child sexual abuse


Not for the victims.  It is a part of my life for the rest of my life.  It affects every single thing in my life.  From the time I get up to the time I go to bed.  I was raped. as a child.  Do you get that?  So you can't say "no matter what" Mr. Kirschner, because you see, the WHAT MATTERS.  And what the WHAT is here is the systematic, continued rape of little boys under Joe Pa's watch.  He could have stopped it - but he chose to look the other way.  Hell, if these emails are found to be true, he told OTHERS to look the other way.  

And that's not a mistake, Mr. Kirschner - it cost little boys their childhoods.  Some, it cost their lives.  

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