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pen on paper: 'Dear diary'
 
Hello, human diary. It is I again, Mitt Romney, your better.

I cannot write much today, Mr. Diary, because I am off to England!

During a conference call, I was finally able to hear some of what my foreign policy team is suggesting as my foreign policy. The overall theme is that we will work hard to protect the Anglo-Saxons from the Soviet Union and from the possible Muslims in the American government, which we will do primarily by opening the hearts of Americans and making them more American, like the English are. So much of this is new information to me—I can certainly see my campaign has been getting its money's worth from these advisers.

There was a bit of confusion earlier as I had presumed we were going to be taking my bus to London. As it turns out this was not the case, which is a bit of a disappointment. I do not know if I have mentioned recently how fond I am of that bus. As part of my new focus on projecting a strong foreign policy, I had planned to send it around to honk loudly at various Olympic events, in order to give the other nations what for.

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