About Mitt Romney's new supporters with some laughter.
In this expensive election, Mr. Romney, it seems, has been able to extend his reach to the constituencies that do not seem like the ideal family values platform. Recent statements from various porn starts and porn industry executives are a proof that Mr. Romney is a well-rounded candidate with a wide appeal to morally sound and suspect constituencies.
In a recent public display of support for Mr. Romney, Jenna Jameson, the legendary porn star, declared her whole-hearted support for Mittens in the following glowing words:
I’m very looking forward to a Republican being back in office,” Jameson said while sipping champagne in a VIP room at Gold Club in the city’s South of Market neighborhood. “When you’re rich, you want a Republican in office. (http://news.yahoo.com/...).
Mittens campaign is, of course, thrilled with this unhesitent show of support. When asked about this new development, the Mittens campaign public affairs officer, Mr. Shoveitt, opined thusly:
It should be obvious now that all business and wealth-loving Americans have now realized that for the future of America and its leading industries, Mitt Romney is the only true choice.
In a related instance of unconditional support, the gay porn mogul, Michael Lucas, has also declared his unconditional support for the candidate. When asked about reasons for his declaration of support, Mr. Lucas said:
Well, for me, having directed so many award-winning gay porn movies, it is all about the looks. I mean, Mr. Romney has the look: I would cast him in any of my movies in a heartbeat. In the end, being an avantgarde artist that I am, I had to go for those porn-star looks.
Fearing that his evangelical followers may not like this new constituency, the Mittens campaign issued a formal statement: “This campaign is about outspending our opponents and if some hardworking Americans, no matter what they do, want to support our cause, then who are we to ask questions.”
“In fact, said Mr. Shoveitt, “it would be totally un-American of us to not accept this cordial support.”
We have learned, through well-placed sources that the porn-industry moguls will be heavily represented at the GOP convention. However, in the interest of their safety, Mittens campaign has decided to build a separate galls-encased enclosure to seat their porn industry friends.
“This is for their own safety” said Mr. Shoveitt, and he added “also to make sure that any germs that they might have caught from the gay stars of their movies do not accidentally infect our other constituency, the social and religious conservative.”
When the candidate was asked to explain as to how he could balance the two extremes of porn stars, GAY PORN STARS, and his Evangelical base, the candidate replied:
Well, it is my job as a leader to bring such diverse groups together under one tent and honestly, if my run for presidency does not work out, I plan to invest in porn industry: This industry has a very promising future and is easier to outsource.”
This is all for now, but, as usual, we will keep you posted of all new developments at the Mittney campaign.
(From
masoodraja.com)