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pen on paper: 'Dear diary'
Hello, human diary. It is I, Mitt Romney, your better.

Today nothing happened. Not a single thing, in fact. And by not a single thing, I mean obviously certain things happened, but all of them were so unimportant as to have effectively not happened, or retroactively not happened, or perhaps future-actively not happened. I have not decided yet.

Today I called on that Akin fellow to stop running for office. I am not sure why, but my advisers said it was a good idea, and that as the new leader of my party I am obligated to do such things. I think they are just attempting to instill a little fear into my vice presidential unit, who has been reminded yet again that he needs to avoid saying similar things.

I was going to reveal parts of my new energy policy at a fundraiser today, but it turns out that there were reporters there so I did not. Also, I am not yet sure what my new energy policy is.

That is all for now. The last few days have been the most satisfying since the days of the primaries, when I could relax for days on end while one or more of my fellow candidate units attempted to extract themselves from various self-made predicaments. There is probably a downside to all of this that I am not considering, but for the most part I am reminded yet again of the many advantages of being in a party with such an ample supply of morons.

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