Dear Job Creator/ Entrepreneur,
As a Republican supporter you think you have stumbled upon the perfect
gaffe by President Barrack Obama, thinking he personally claimed responsibility for creating your business.
Firstly, I honor your job creating record and congratulate you on your accomplishments of starting a business, taking the risks, and succeeding. I am personally thrilled the National Republican Party in Tampa will honor you with a full night of platitudes. Without the entrepreneur spirit, this country would not be where it's at. I know you require this type of platitude in order to motivate you to continue your job creating ways. May the Republicans bestow upon you more tax credits and even more reverence. Perhaps one day, we will even build statues to honor you for your job creating prowess.
During the Great Reccession your willingness to take business losses in exchange for keeping your extra employees on the job was legendary. Your willingness to keep call centers open, even with no calls coming in was wonderfully beneficial to the your internet surfing employees. Your employees learned how to simultaneously text home and check Facebook, all while earning a good paycheck. You so generously never passed on healthcare premium increases to employees. You never hired temps, always paid benefits for all hires. You never fired or laid off. As a larger employer, you smartly took your savings from tax breaks and subsidies to in order to run up record cash reserves. Further, you rightly predicted you might need the money in cash reserves in case the U.S. sheeple reelected that Commie Muslim Obama for four more years.
Moreover, props to you for contributing money to groups with your back such as the Chamber of Commerce. They rightly lobbied to take money from local education so you could get a property tax break. Also, don't forget the Chamber opposes taking you as a business owner off the hook for healthcare expenses by opposing single payer healthcare. (That would be socialist)
Obviously, Barrack Obama did not build your business. How silly it was for him to take credit.
Oh wait, Obama didn't actually say he built your business, he said government built the roads and bridges and infrastructure you used to help build your business. Further, he also was referring to teacher or two helping you get to where you are.
I understand you as a job creator are too busy to submit to the actual quote and diagram here on sentence structure. I will not bore you with this. However, I am willing to send you a diagram of what he did say with colorful easy to read graphics, so you can pull it out out to look at during one of your many daily meetings. I will even including an arrow pointing to what words Obama was referring to in his speech when he uttered the famous "that". (or was it "this"?)
Anyways, I know this view of what Obama said runs counter to Fox New, who, through creative editing, made up this whole meme. Are you aware that they own something called a "editing machine?" Are you aware that Fox News sometimes edits stories to fit their agenda?
If after reading this letter you are still insistent on thinking Barrack Obama goes around taking credit for creating your small businesses I have some advise to you. If you think you do not need the government to help you in any capacity.........
Like a parent might say their kid who threatens to run away from home.
I say to the exalted job creator.....
"Good luck on your own kid............."Please don't think I don't want you to succeed. However, just try succeeding in a country where your workers are being taught by minimum wage teachers in classrooms of 40 kids. Please don't send your trucks and supplies down our roads and bridges. I am sure some local farmers will allow you to use their tractor paths. Also please resist asking for subsidies. Tax breaks are good. As you have spoken and testified repeatedly- you do not need government for you business to succeed. It is 100% up to your ability.
I genuinely wish you success in your business.
You are right in thinking its all about making money for you. Screw the workers, screw the economy, screw the environment. As long as your family is provided for, that's all that counts.
And for the last time please don't whine when your customers don't have any money to pay for your products. Unions have been weakened. Wages overall are down.
By cutting millions of government jobs, no one has any income. Also, since no one is left working in government, there will be no private sector to government business anymore, so the private sector is taking a hit too.
Hey, at least we beat Ireland and Greece in GDP this last quarter........
Also, if the government decides to bestows a tax credit or tax break on you, please do not feel you have to reinvest it in your company. Please take your profits and hide them in an oversees tax havens. Or please please, simply buy a yacht.
Again, as a job creator, you are nothing but a diety to me. I praise thee up and down.
However, if the go it alone strategy doesn't quite work from here on out.....
The people of the United States will leave a light on for you..........
P.S. Could someone send me a notice for which number booth in Tampa at the RNC where Michelle Bachmann will be giving foot baths for job creators?
A note for my republican humor impaired friends:
This dairy is full of sarcasm directed at the people who live life thinking about nothing but themselves. We do actually care about job creators. We also know that demand is important for a business, just as important as cash flow and supply. Do don't go running around on your talk shows stating Dems don't care about business. We also place value in our teachers and our workers. Most businesses are tremendous assets to their communities.