As the countdown to the Republican convention continues, a lot of those Republicans have been spending a lot of time creating a so-called "platform" which puts into words what it is that Republicans want people to think about them.
Of course, in the bizzarro-world known as Republican-land all of those nice sounding words will, as usual, be completely disonant from what those very same Republicans really feel and think and would say out loud if they only didn't have to also get people to vote for them, too.
So, in order to try to make things a little easier for folks, following is the real agenda of the Republican Party, if only they could tell people what they really think and if only they didn't have to...worry about getting people to vote for them (they're working on "fixing" that problem in states across the land, as we speak).
The REAL 2012 G.O.P. Agenda:
.Narrow-mindedness
.Intolerance
.Selfishness
.Greed
.Racism
.Sexism
.Elitism
Dedicated to “Whatever"...
.Big Business wants
.Big Oil insists upon
.Health Care Profiteers demand
.Billionaires dictate
.Polluters request
.Warmongers ask
.Pat Robertson tells them
Brought to you by their current crop of mis-leaders (legends in their own minds):
.Mittch-A-Sketch Romney
.Paul (Medicare for none) Ryan
.John (“dead soldiers are a small sacrifice”) Boehner
.Mitch (“There's not enough money in politics”) McConnell
.Todd (legitimate rape victims can't get pregnant) Akin
.Michele (Muslims have infiltrated the government) Bachmann
.and Sarah Palin (the half-term governor), also
Those Grand Old Prostitutes...higher-priced than ever before...but dedicated to the same very, very, very old practices of trying to take us backwards in time to the way things used to be (before Medicare, before Social Security, before regulations protecting the food and drugs people ingest, before Voting Rights, before Civil Rights, before worker rights, before women's rights, before there were protections against back-alley abortionists, before there were environmental protections, etc., etc., etc.)