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This is not the diary I started to write this week.  That one was fun, and hopeful.  It's languished untouched for four nights now.  This is the one that happened instead.  

If you're at all inclined to lurking on righty blogs, you know the political landscape is not currently a happy place for conservatives.  The clouds in their worldview are dark and threatening.  They're frightened bordering on desperate.  Their regressive fantasy of "Traditional America" is crumbling before their eyes as those they've oppressed for so long proudly rise up and claim their rights as Americans.  But when this landed in my inbox with a sickening thud, polarization became personal.

More below the swirl of OMGWTF.

My parents are severely conservative conservatives.  Fiscal, social, Christian, the whole package.  So was I, a long time ago.  It's been twenty years since I switched from (R) to (D) in 1992, and almost as long since I identified with any organized religion besides an occasional affinity for UU (they have the best musicians!)

The last time we got into religion and politics was a couple of years ago.  We made a bit of a scene in public.  Since then, we've kept it at arm's length, which is somewhat easier when you live in distant states.  We talk cats, football, cooking, and work.  It's not ideal, but it's worked reasonably well.

Last week, I mentioned in passing that I was volunteering at the DNC.  I didn't expect a parade, but I also didn't expect venom.  That's what I got.  From 600 miles away, Mom's stifled gasp of horror leapt from my phone as if she were next to me.

"You're ... still ... for ... Obama???"  She spit the last three syllables out like a mouthful of nails.

We talked for a few more minutes, but the conversation was strained beyond repair.  I never did call back.  In the afterglow of the DNC, I just couldn't work myself up to jumping in that cold shower again.

The Monday after, Mom forwarded me a lengthy article imploring me to read it.  We exchange emails frequently, usually re: recipes, cat videos, and brief pleasantries between phone calls.  Never, ever anything like this.  It took an hour for my hands to stop shaking.

The author is Mychal Massie, and the article is entitled "Why I Do Not Like Obama," dated 22 Feb 2012.  It was a sucker punch straight to the gut.  I'm not going to link to filth, but the full text is on his eponymous website (dash between first & last name.)  If you must, supplemental oxygen and an antiemetic may be indicated.  

Massie opens with traditional GOPer wilted word salad tossed with a bold appalling grammar vinaigrette.

The other evening on my twitter, a person asked me why I didn’t like the Obama’s?
A two paragraph rant follows explaining why he doesn't hate the Obama's (sic), he just has contempt for them.  The last two words are "Communist state."

Now that his audience is warmed up, he cuts to the chase.

I don’t hate them per definition, but I condemn them because they are the worst kind of racialists, they are elitist Leninists with contempt for traditional America. They display disrespect for the sanctity of the office he holds, and for those who are willing to admit same Michelle Obama’s raw contempt for white America is transpicuous.
OK, what the Southern fried f***???  Elitist Leninists?  How many times can you use the word "contempt" in three paragraphs, anyway?  Is raw tastier than cooked?  Were you throwing darts at your thesaurus when you chose the word "transpicuous?"

That's only the beginning.  It gets much, much uglier.  I'll spare further details and move along to my response.  I've edited out some of the more personal family stuff, but this is most of it.  It took two solid days to put together.  We can poke fun at the wingnuts -- I just did.  But the sad truth is, this shit is tearing families apart.  

Here it is:

Dear Mom,

I had planned to have this conversation with you in person or at least on the phone, but after reading your email, I can no longer remain silent.  Since you have endorsed Mychal Massie's words as your own, I will treat them as such in my response.  

First, was surprised and saddened by your negative reaction to my volunteer work with the DNC last week.  We may not agree politically, but I was hurt by your implication that I am too young and/or naive to understand the issues.  In November I will vote in my sixth presidential election.  I was a registered Republican for many years.  My change of affiliation was well thought out, and I have no qualms to this day about splitting my ticket by each individual candidate’s merit over party.  I’m a liberal, not a zealot.

Speaking nurse to nurse, I thought you'd be at least a little proud of me for volunteering in my community.  I do that sometimes.  Even Democrats are human, and occasionally need help getting around.  

Despite our differences, I have enough respect for your Christianity and political conservatism that I've gone out of my way not to judge or disparage your beliefs.  Experience has taught me that reacting with hostility diminishes everyone's credibility and convinces no one.  But if Mychal Massie's rant (his word) truly reflects what is in your heart, I'll need to remove my gloves for a moment and be brutally honest.  

This needs to stop.  I am no longer a child and will not tolerate being spoken to as if my personal beliefs were the passing whims of a naive adolescent.  Nor will I tolerate thinly-veiled hate speech, even if its "eloquent" author happens to be black.  It is one thing to dislike the President, but you have crossed a line with this.  

Your email begins by identifying Mychal Massie as a "respected writer and talk show host."  My question is, respected by whom?  By people who wear their open contempt for the President of the United States and his family as a badge of honor?  By people who sling eight pages of vile accusations and insults without benefit of a single factual citation?  To be fair, I even took the time to read some of Mr. Massie's other columns.  Suffice it to say I won't dignify his work with any further comment.  

I am deeply thankful to have been raised by loving parents who always encouraged me to fulfill my potential, and I think the results speak for themselves.  I've studied hard and worked my way into a stable job in a specialty I love.  I've been married to the same man for almost 14 years.  And you were right -- I’m SO glad you made me take piano lessons!   Life hasn't always been easy, but I am happy.  

This is incredibly sad.  I love you and Dad very much, and know you have always loved me.  You’ve earned the life you enjoy today, and I’m glad for you.  But if we are to have a healthy relationship going forward, you will have to come to terms with the reality that am an adult.  That’s what you raised me to become, isn’t it?

My opinions and beliefs are not open to debate.  I am a liberal Democrat and a Unitarian.  That is not going to change.  You have been telling me the world was going to hell in a handbasket and Jesus is coming back soon since the seventies.  I've heard and considered all the arguments.  This is who I am.

I always wanted to make you proud.  I'm sorry you're not.  We won't be visiting next weekend.  I hope you are able to look into your heart and ask yourself how became so consumed with rage and fear that you would even consider sending something like this to your own child on the eve of a much-anticipated family visit.  I’ve already talked to  (sibs).  It’s a huge bummer, but my decision is final.    

Words have consequences.  Yours have done deep damage.  I hope it was worth it.  Most of all, I hope you find peace.



FWIW, I've gone back and forth on publishing this diary.  It's not my intention to air family laundry.  My parents are delightful, fun, smart people when they're out of their echo chamber.  They've been evangelical Christians most of my life, so it's not like we're dealing with anything new here.  I just miss being able to enjoy their company without all ... this.  Elephant in the room, indeed.

What's new is the pre-emptive aggression.  It knocked the wind out of me.  It was time to speak up.  If any of this is helpful to anyone in a similar situation, feel free to borrow as you wish.  I welcome your comments.


If your family could invite one President to dinner, it would be:

1%1 votes
26%24 votes
5%5 votes
8%8 votes
29%27 votes
16%15 votes
0%0 votes
4%4 votes
7%7 votes
1%1 votes

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Comment Preferences

  •  Curious Browns fan (3+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    SteelerGrrl, ladybug53, Ginny in CO

    Was there a response?

    Horse prom is black tie muthaf**ka - Jon Stewart

    by EntrWriter on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 03:17:12 PM PDT

  •  I am fortunate to have parents (6+ / 0-)

    who can make me look downright reactionary sometimes.

    As to what president to dinner - Harry Truman.

    Strength and dignity are her clothing, she rejoices at the days to come; She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the law of kindness is on her tongue.

    by loggersbrat on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 03:21:51 PM PDT

  •  Sorry for your troubles. (8+ / 0-)

    Seems some are spending so much time in their bubble that they are convinced everyone else thinks the same way. The R's are always saying, "The American people agree..." with this or that. Or they feel somesuch. We know that's not true, but a steady diet of that and you start to believe.

    Anyone who doesn't agree is just misinformed or blind to the facts. They are to be pitied and prosyletized.

    I've lost a few friends and have some in-laws who I only small-talk with. It's a tough spot. You did right hitting the mature adult button. It is afterall, what a parent hopes to accomplish. Maybe they need this push to re-form a new adult to adult relationship.

    Best wishes, and congrats on being a fully formed, functioning, contributing adult.

    "Mitt Romney seems like the kind of man who immediately rushes off to wash his hands after sex. Really. Don't you think so?" My mother in law!

    by lexalou on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 03:24:14 PM PDT

    •  Thank you (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Ginny in CO, BachFan

      It's actually empowering to finally have it out there.  I'm too old to have to keep pretending.

       I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

      by SteelerGrrl on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 04:02:27 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  It is liberating. While I don't have quite (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        chimene, SteelerGrrl

        the degree of problem with my 87 yo UU father who totally supports Obama, he can be just as condescending as he always was on issues he is misinformed on. Proud of me? Never. I've accomplished more than either of my sisters, except my nursing salary was you know what, so there.

        My mom, who he psychologically tore down publicly without ever showing any positive emotion, did more with her mid life AD RN than I have been able to with a BSN (she could do management, I burn out). In many ways, I think she did more with her degree than he did with a PhD. Most of that is due to her social skills.

        Also 87, she is much better informed than Dad or his CPA wife. She had back surgery Tuesday and had to get 2 units of blood today. We were talking just an hour ago, she has followed the Libya crisis very well and since the surgery went better than the doc expected, she is happier than I have seen her in years. I actually told her if she wasn't so alert, I would be worrying that the pain med dose was too high!

        In 2006 I had tried to talk to Dad about a controversial issue and his response was unbelievably rude -  based on no information. (Dad reads periodicals and newspapers only, no books.) I ultimately did the same kind of email and since then we have maintained a small talk only relationship. His aging has helped my reaction to his comments - which haven't changed. So, I also think it gets better once you speak up.

        You did much earlier than I. That would be my recommendation to any one in this kind of relationship. Look at it very carefully, in writing if possible. The insights can help a lot. I learned some things about my grandfather then that really explained Dad's emotionless mind. Turns out Grandpa, who died when dad was 3, was a super warm and loving father. The older sibs are all like that underneath Grandma's humorous reserve.

        "People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed and redeemed; never throw out anyone. " Audrey Hepburn "A Beautiful Woman"

        by Ginny in CO on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 07:28:41 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  Thanks for sharing this (1+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          Ginny in CO

          I appreciate your comment about dealing with it early.  They are only late 60's, healthy and very active.  I can see them remaining that way for many more years, but it's a relief to have this out there ahead of any potential crises.

           I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

          by SteelerGrrl on Fri Sep 14, 2012 at 01:56:46 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

  •  Sometimes it's hard to be old. (5+ / 0-)

    On the other hand, my rather reactionary parents went to meet their maker before the advent of e-mail and e-mail astroturf.
    My sympathies, but do your best with the cat videos, it sounds like they could use some humour in their lives ;-)

    "There's a crack in everything; that's how the light gets in". Leonard Cohen

    by northsylvania on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 03:33:28 PM PDT

  •  Fool me once (8+ / 0-)

    Shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

    Massie has been caught multiple times peddling rumors that are not true and have already been debunked. He doesn't seem to care.

    Is it possible your parents don't know this? I think it might be helpful for you to take one of the lies and debunk it specifically.  When most people catch someone lying about one thing, they tend to view everything else said by that person with suspicion.

    Unfortunately, if they are getting their news from WND (otherwise known as World Nut Daily), they are being stuffed full of an amazing diet of mendacity. Of course anyone who believed all that stuff would hate Obama!

    •  That's the problem (3+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      kalmoth, lexalou, BachFan

      I assumed reason would prevail and we'd find enough common ground for a pleasant visit.  It was time to say something.  

      They are notoriously news-averse and get most of all of their information from Fox and conservative Christian news sites.  I'm an informed follower of those sites for that reason, but I had no idea it was this bad.

       I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

      by SteelerGrrl on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 03:52:19 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  Other: The Incumbent! (4+ / 0-)

    He's the only one I think would talk WITH me, not AT me.

    Am I right, or am I right? - The Singing Detective

    by Clem Yeobright on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 03:40:45 PM PDT

  •  Thank you for sharing your exhange. (6+ / 0-)

    Unfortunately, you may have to just forgive them, even if they don't come around, even as you limit your exposure.

    If they have sufficient skills to be loving parents, they will respond by respecting the boundary that you laid down clearly.

    If they can't, and decide that they would rather be "right" than be "close" as a family, than that is a loss for everyone.

    Overcoming racism, homophobia and religious bigotry has torn many families apart, as you know.  I hope that you may find some solace in knowing you broke a cycle, and you are living a great example for your kids (if you have any) as well as others around you who can see, appreciate, and respect you you grew up to be today.

    •  Thank you (5+ / 0-)

      I don't have kids by choice, but my sibs are supportive and I'm blessed with amazing in-laws.  I've known for a long time this would eventually come to a head, and was mentally prepared to face it.  Hubby is behind me 100%.  No regrets.

       I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

      by SteelerGrrl on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 04:22:19 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  Sometimes we choose our families. (3+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        LilithGardener, SteelerGrrl, Thestral

        Or choose to recreate them. It sounds like you have chosen well, and there's hope for Mom and Dad to make the right choice for them.

        "Mitt Romney seems like the kind of man who immediately rushes off to wash his hands after sex. Really. Don't you think so?" My mother in law!

        by lexalou on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 04:24:42 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  My chosen family (3+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          lexalou, Thestral, Ginny in CO

          was ultimately the tipping point.  I was raised to fear and distrust large swaths of humanity -- teh gay, teh not-white or not-Christian or heaven forbid, anyone seeking "government entitlements."  All these and more were systematically dehumanized and deemed unworthy of "Real America."  

          All are also represented in my chosen family.  Most of my friends are musicians, nearly all are artists.  I think that's what made it so I'm-not-having-this-for-another-minute personal.

           I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

          by SteelerGrrl on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 04:57:57 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

  •  I'm assuming (7+ / 0-)

    that your parents still are in Pennsylvania? It's a weird state--there's Pittsburgh and Philly which are blue, and then the rest of the state, which is....wingnut redneck red just about everywhere else, depending on where outside the major citites that one lives.

    I speak from experience, I was born and raised not far from Pittsburgh. And I swear, I do not for the life of me understand how I'm related to the people back home I call my brothers. It's like night and day.  

    I'm sorry this happened, and I can definitely relate. And I think your response is dignified, grown-up and appropriate.

    It is time to #Occupy Media.

    by lunachickie on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 04:02:12 PM PDT

    •  In the Centre (3+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      BachFan, lunachickie, etbnc

      By way of northeast PA, Lou Barletta's district, where I was born and raised.  Football was practically a religion there and I was a Steeler fan long before I was "saved" ;)

      Thanks for your kind words.  I did my best to de-escalate the situation with honesty, and without resorting to hostility or profanity.  

       I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

      by SteelerGrrl on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 04:38:09 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  Hang in there! (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:

        I don't know if it'll ever get easier, but the distance helps. I've lived in Florida since 1989, it just feels like home now. "Home for the holidays" is about all I can take anymore. This may be the only good reason to be broke right now--money is so damned tight we won't be visiting this year.  I keep telling myself one day, they'll wake up but I can't make them. Last year was depressing as hell.

        btw, I did mean to note earlier how much I loved this paragraph. Humor helps too :))

        OK, what the Southern fried f***???  Elitist Leninists?  How many times can you use the word "contempt" in three paragraphs, anyway?  Is raw tastier than cooked?  Were you throwing darts at your thesaurus when you chose the word "transpicuous?"

        It is time to #Occupy Media.

        by lunachickie on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 08:05:29 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  :) (0+ / 0-)

          A slightly twisted sense of humor definitely comes in handy.  That was the most fun part to write, glad you enjoyed it!

           I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

          by SteelerGrrl on Fri Sep 14, 2012 at 05:00:46 AM PDT

          [ Parent ]

    •  urban / rural (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:

      The divide in many places today is urban / rural.

      Rural residents tend to feel disconnected from government, which makes it easier to maintain conservative anti-government attitdues.

      Government services tend to be most visible and noticeable in cities, so city residents tend to feel stronger personal connections to functioning govementments. In rural areas it's easier for folks to maintain beliefs that government is some far-off, disconnected mystery that doesn't figure into their lives.

      It would be great to overcome this divide en mass. Mostly, though, we do it one person and one conversation at a time.

      Good luck,

  •  FWIW a friend of mine has reported similar (7+ / 0-)

    family rifts arising from Romney's campaign, where in moderate Mormon's who strongly value religious freedom and the separation of church and state have come to view him as not at all committed to secular American government.

    For some of them, the social sanctions will be quite severe.

  •  Tom Jefferson. (4+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    WheninRome, SteelerGrrl, Wee Mama, BachFan

    Conversation would have a lot of variety.

    I am not religious, and did NOT say I enjoyed sects.

    by trumpeter on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 04:41:05 PM PDT

  •  I feel your pain (7+ / 0-)

    I am dealing with a similar issue, but with my brother... our  parents are both dead. He has sent me some vile, racist, homophobic and ignorant e-mails denegrating Obama and railing against the "leftists". He knows that I am an Obama supporter and a lesbian. He is, supposedly, a "devout Catholic", while I am a UU and preach at my local UU Church regularly.
    I finally requested that he stop sending me his vile garbage and he became dare I try to infringe on his "1st Amendment rights".....?!! I responded that he could say anything he wants, but I don't have to listen. He told me to F%#k myself and that was the last time we have communicated.
    I will not tolerate this behavior and will  not speak with him again until after the election...but then what? I don't know how we can heal this and am preparing myself for the possibility that we may never be deeply connected again. This is not just politics..this is my life, my values, what I believe in my soul.
    The road has diverged for us.

    •  So sorry to hear this (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      No one gets out alive

      I am prepared for that possibility as well.  It's hard to face, but some things are simply intolerable.

       I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

      by SteelerGrrl on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 07:06:32 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  Sorry to hear this all too UU story. (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:

      When we moved to the KC KS area in '65, we initially went to a large church until my folks got a bunch of others from where we lived to start a fellowship. One of the members, a sociology professor, gave the sermon on "A Mighty Fortress or A Small Cocoon" to challenge the members on what kind of church they wanted and how size would affect it.

      The result was the formation of 'Cocoons', groups of families who voluntarily agreed to become families of choice. Oddly, we were the only one that had not broken off from a Christian or other upbringing. My paternal grandmother was a Unitarian, and in an ironic twist, all three of Dad's siblings had become Christians.

      We heard a lot of heartbreaking stories about family battles and rejections. It was a wonderful experience for me. If it hadn't been for 4 cocoon dads filling in the gaping hole of my dads emotional support, love and respect, I would have been very messed up.

      Even with that wonderful, created family, one of the women -delightful, loving mom of 5- took suicide over the demons from her very fundamentalist parents.

      The other anecdotal contribution is that in home care I ran into elderly siblings who had chosen to bury the old wounds and rebuilt their relationships very effectively. As you say, after the election. Maybe even several years when things are clearly better, without the country becoming socialist or communist, sharia law, higher deficits, etc. etc.

      "People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed and redeemed; never throw out anyone. " Audrey Hepburn "A Beautiful Woman"

      by Ginny in CO on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 07:59:16 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  'Cocoons' (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Ginny in CO

        Love it!  What a great concept!

         I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

        by SteelerGrrl on Fri Sep 14, 2012 at 02:04:50 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  Forgot to mention, Ozzie, (1+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:

          the professor who gave the sermon, was a part of our cocoon with his wife (also PhD) and son. Very interesting and delightful couple.

          If it hadn't been for 4 cocoon dads, ... I would have been very messed up.
          Um, rereading that, I can hear a few people point out from their perspective it didn't help all that much ;)  I am pleased to be the non conformist in any group. Even DKos.

          "People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed and redeemed; never throw out anyone. " Audrey Hepburn "A Beautiful Woman"

          by Ginny in CO on Fri Sep 14, 2012 at 07:56:08 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

    •  Why would you speak to him again ever? (0+ / 0-)

      I would wait for the apology.

      I know - That's my way, not necessarily yours.

      I've walked this walk.  10 years now and I think we're all happier not pissing each other off.

      The Fail will continue until actual torches and pitchforks are set in motion. -

      by No one gets out alive on Fri Sep 14, 2012 at 06:08:54 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  It's weird how words have lost their meaning (3+ / 0-)

    when words having and maintaining their meaning is not useful to the American Right.

    No matter what one thinks of, say, Karl Marx, or Lenin, Mao, whoever, they were actual people. Actual people who had actual and specific beliefs.

    There are facts and details behind those names.

    You don't have to agree with them, in fact you can loathe them with every fiber of your being, and still know the facts and details. They are not generic terms for "bad". Socialism and Communism are actual political beliefs with specific ideas and policies you can learn about. They are not generic terms for "bad" either.

    If President Barack Obama is a Socialist, or a Communist, then so was Richard Nixon (who passed price controls and founded a slew of government agencies), Ronald Reagan (who raised taxes, expanded the intrusive power of government agencies, could not run with his hair on fire out of Lebanon faster after the lethal Beruit barracks bombing, and saddled the nation with staggering debt while he expanded the size and intrusive power of the state) and George W. Bush (who also expanded Medicare with an expensive and flawed unfunded perscription drug benefit, along with expanding the size and intrusive policing power of the federal government, via the DHS and No Child Left Behind, he just refused to pay for it).

    Socialist doesn't mean "Republicans don't like this".
    There are a lot of things I dislike Movement Conservatism over. Big Picture things.

    But one thing that doesn't quite rise to the level of 'destroying the middle class in the name of elevating/saving it' is the blanding and rendering as generic of words and people into x means nothing more specific than "bad".

    A Socialist is a real thing. Socialism, Liberalism, Marxism, Leninism, Secular Humanism are actual ideas you don't have to believe in to understand and know about.

    X means "bad".

    No, no. X doesn't.

    You might think X results in bad outcomes. Fine. Argue that.

    But X doesn't mean "bad".

    Bad does.

    It's one of the saddest little things that a really awful political movement that has saddled our nation with a lot of really awful big things has given us.

    But you have to do things like this, render words and names meaningless beyond generic buzzwords for "bad", to get people who might otherwise not slap such specific labels on people who disagree with them to do so.

    Obviously anybody who is intellectually honest, and actually knows the biography of Mao or Stalin, would be embarassed to call a moderate Democratic politician as being akin to them.

    Movement Conservatism has a lot of bad eggs in it. But it is also pernicious because it is deliberately keeping a whole hell of a lot of people, friends and family and co-workers, who might not necessarily stop being more conservative than I am if they were keyed in to the facts, but might be more able to see the value of a functioning society and the need for good government, or might not be able to look at Elizabeth Warren and say without batting an eye that she wants re-education camps somewhere.

    Clueless for a cause.

    I am from the Elizabeth Warren and Darcy Burner wing of the Democratic Party

    by LeftHandedMan on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 07:27:35 PM PDT

    •  Oh, yes (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      lunachickie, SteelerGrrl

      I'm sorry for your pain and your frustration as you try to have a relationship with your family while trying to get through this awful business that plagues this nation via the Culture Wars.

      Here's hoping when we win them, and we will, because conservatism doesnt work it only delays the inevitable changes tha society experiences, the fact that we don't immediately ship everybody they know and themselves into re-education camps, or simply shoot them, doesn't go unnoticed.

      I have some doozies in my family as well.

      It can be trying. So trying. To get through these times with them.

      I am from the Elizabeth Warren and Darcy Burner wing of the Democratic Party

      by LeftHandedMan on Thu Sep 13, 2012 at 07:31:46 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  thanking my lucky stars (1+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:

    that my parents are not like that.

    You have my most sincere condolences.

    "You try to vote or participate in the government/ and the muh'fuckin' Democrats is actin' like Republicans" ~ Kweli -8.00, -6.56

    by joey c on Fri Sep 14, 2012 at 12:01:04 PM PDT

    •  Thanks so much (0+ / 0-)

      It's a little surreal -- I've always thought of my family as more eccentric than dysfunctional.  It's opened my eyes.  I'm OK with it, though.  It was a matter of when, not if.

       I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine.     -- Kurt Vonnegut

      by SteelerGrrl on Fri Sep 14, 2012 at 02:18:11 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  I'm sorry you're going through this. (1+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:

    I made a similar choice.  Now both my mother and my brother are dead, and my sister and I have discovered that we have far more in common than they let us believe.  Those two would have preferred Jefferson Davis.  My sister and I are thankful that Obama is at the helm right now.

    Sometimes the only thing to do is to distance yourself.  You are not being selfish -- you are protecting your own integrity.

    "Fighting Fascism is Always Cool." -- Amsterdam Weekly, v3, n18 (-8.50, -7.23)

    by Noor B on Sat Sep 22, 2012 at 08:47:16 AM PDT

  •  i thought your letter was very good. (0+ / 0-)

    my sister sent me some crap a couple years ago. it involved some lies by a person named betsy mcconnaughy or something like that? anyway i debunked the crap in my response and at the end of my email said, i love you. please never send me this shit again. she never has. we stay away from politics most of the time but if she brings something up (voter ID was the most recent)) she's lucky to get a word in edgewise.
    i hope you will write another diary with her response. your letter was so humble and down to earth. maybe she'll hear you, really hear you. i hope so.

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