Gus polish'd the speak'n rock and put my rock'n chair dead center and spread the sheepskin across it. Diego did his magic with the village fire pit. People began com'n to picnic and listen.
I call'd for an opinion night. My right as a villager. Where ya get to let the stress go and really pitch a winger to your neighbors and they let ya. Most folk are taciturny.
As it got dark and people were burp'n supper, I look'd up and saw the last of the Blue Moon. Punkin' time be coming. Squash for winter and to feed the critters. I struck my walk'n stick to the rock ledge and began my opin'n:
All you listen now. That means you too, Abby...There are two men run'n to be President. One we know, 'cuz he sits at the people's desk. Got it polish'd up again from W's big butt. He's work'n hard to make things right and do'n fine by it. Solid. Stable. Been down and up like all a' us.
Other guy is a real rich'n. Makes his scratch by hook'n crook. Like that guy who tried to sell you the miracle cure. You'all gots the trots and he cured his empty purse. Same kind'a fella.
Guy's name is Willard Romney. Guess they call him, 'Mitt.' Don't know why. Then again...(honk'd a snot and let it fly).
Seems to me that young Barack has his possibles together. Hard move'n into a fixer-upper after that doofy W kid got done with it. Took all a'us two years to build the foot bridge. 'Member? Be reck'n Barack's gonna need a bit longer to get to the paint'n.
But, I ain't gonna talk about our President. I'm gonna tell you what I be think'n of that Romney fella.
He be a tall man. Scrawny, if a'sit'n a horse. Got Beady eyes that dart a'bout like bats. Scat-eat'n grin. Moves like a'old pug bronco rider with his joints wired too tight. Acts like his mind don't quite know where its at.
'Member Squirrely Bill? Yep. That's what I'm a mean'n. Got the feel'n if'n Mitt tried lean'n a fence the fence wouldn't allow it.
Anywho, this guy wants your vote. But, I be think'n his eye is on your pocket and his hand be in it, if'n he be elect'd.
Be said Romney has more than $250 million dollars. Ever wonder why he wants to spend yours and not his? Give it a big think, cause he keeps his coin in Switzerland, Europe. Some of it be buried in some vault on an island. Pirate like, kinda.
Kinda got the feel'n if Mitt gets elected, we all gonna walk the plank.
I be about done. This dude ain't the guy to lead our country's wagon train. He'd have us go'n six-ways from Sunday if'n his mouth'n is any indication. Then where ya gonna be? Follow'n the ghosts of the Donner Party, that' what.
Now, Sally's got the kegs chill'd and spout'd. Be sure to vote for Barack. He's a sweetie!
I'm gonna go have a good dump. 'Nite!