You cannot rhyme with it. Orange puns are notoriously poor and groan-eliciting. Orange jokes are flatter than Ryan's EEG printout. It won't grow in central or northern climes. The only thing you can mix it with to make it palatable is vodka.
So why a diary about "oranges" and why now?
More below the orange peal remnant thingie.
Orange has a few things going for it, I must admit.
It is the color of choice of John Boehner, a man who will soon give up his gavel and return it to the rightful owner, a lovely, smart, talented left coaster.
Apparently, when his BrAIN tRUST sees fit, it is also the make up color of choice of Millard Witless Romney. At least when he goes and plays on T&V. Or should we simply call him "stench?" That has a comfortable ring to it, somehow.
So what are the Fire Orange stories hitting on all fours?
a) The conventional wisdom hath spake, and Romney's choice of that appaulling Ryan is generally believed to be a complete bust.
Four major league stories, including one muddle of the road, and one conservative source published or aired stories on how the Ryan choice is now hurting, not helping Millard's election effort.
More interesting is how Ryan himself is stepping up his efforts in Wisconsin, already knowing that the national election has already been flushed. Even more telling, he hides from his opponent, refusing to appear for a debate.
The operative word, it seems, is fear. He fears just how poorly the Romney BrAIN tRUST is screwing up the campaign. He fears that his own usually invulnerable federal nest is at risk. He fears that his reputation as the Smarmiest, no, Smartest TeaBugger in DC is at risk.
Just as interesting is Romney's apparent gagging of Ryan. While it may surprise some in the journalistic circles, if you think about it, it is his SOP. Recall his debate coach? Too much favorable attention? FIRE HIM. Ryan? getting cheers and chants, while Romney managed to pour cold water over a promising event? FIRE HIM. Or at least muzzle him.
Romney is too petty, too thin skinned, and too convinced of his unequalled brilliance and talent. Anything or anyone that puts his self-image at risk is a target.
b) Sarah Palin
Ah, vengeance is truly a dish best served cold. Sarah pushed the bubble a few times, she created strife and trouble. I think we can agree that her lock & Load mentality did not cause conservative crazies to go shoot people, but she clearly raised the temperature to a degree just under the boiling over point. For that, she bears total responsibility.
What is so pleasing is how little attention she now garners. Her tweets are the source of humor and derision. Her books? They are used to prop doors open, and frequently gather on the $1.00 table in bookstores. Her opinions sway no one, and her ideas are best described as nothing more than a lamentable, ludicrous, lamestream of consciousness, blather.
It may have taken a year longer than I expected, and two years longer than I had hoped, but she has finally reached her nadir, or, if you wish, the exact level of reputation, talent, and ability that she so clearly has earned.
The best part? her fall from the previous heights to which she was artificially raised, means that given her lack of intellectual power (15 watts on the lumen scale of intelligence), her growing weariness and showing of age and overuse, and the fact that she is little more than a national joke today, she has no, zero, nil, none, "0" chance of ever running for and inflicting herself on America on a national scale ever again.
c) debate prep
So, they set aside an entire day of Millard Stench practicing his one liners? Gee, so glad they told us that. How lucky for Stench's team that Obama's election crew is oblivious, inept, illiterate, and unaware of how, why, where, when, and with whom Stench is practicing.
Gee, you think that Stench's one liners might garner a response from Obama during the campaign?
I read, viewed the video, and reread the transcript of Ann Romney trying her damnedest to tell a joke about where Stench buried the bod - - no, it was where Romney corpses can be found. Upstream, apparently.
I guess that means they have a lot in common with salmon, especially about rotting from the head first. Single minded, mindless, instinctive, rather than rational, reflexive, and always attracted to shiny things (although green script bearing images of dead presidents work as well with Stench), the GOP candidate DOES have a lot in common with them.
d) Alan West
West is a thug. A liar, a cheat, and quite possibly, semi-delusional. I suspect, like with Michelle and other TeaBuggered assholes, that religion plays a large role in their delusions, irrational positions, and ability to lie through their teeth.
While I enjoy a political fight as much, if not more than a world class bout like Frazier-Ali, this battle is reaching new lows. An acquaintence of mine is on West's re-erection campaign staff. Unfortunately, I see much of their work product. Having a bottle of anti-bacterial gel nearby is always welcome.
d) TeaBuggery
Of all my predictive and analytical power, my biggest failure (outside of marrying me ex-spouse) had to do with TeaBuggerers. How could such an artificial, unnatural, irrational, and generally motley crew of functionally illiterates survive and become a farce in GOP power politics? The imprint of ultra-conservative billionaires was so obvious, my first and only thought was that the normal, red blooded, thinking American would laugh or be repulsed by such a fraud on the public.
Instead, the grass roots version actually survived. They attracted thousands (bussing in many of them for free) and they clearly grabbed the attention of the MSM. In fact, many within the MSM were either in bed with the organizers, or simply enjoyed the spectacle. Either way, despite minimal numbers, stupid ideas, really bad signs, and illogical positions and ideas, the TeaBuggerers became a political force. And like a quick affair based solely on hormones and the netherparts, it took a while for America to wake up. And wake up it has.
The idiocy and ineffable stupidity that is so deeply ingrained in the entire TeaBuggerer movement, has finally become obvious to Joe 6-pack and his lovely, overweight, soccer mom wife.
Alan West is in trouble. Michelle Bachmann is in trouble. Smith, and several others, including several GOP senatorial candidolts, are also reeling from internal and external polling numbers.
"How could this be? We are right and everyone else is a muslin worshiping socialist, fascist, anti-murrican, over-ejukated, traitor!"
I am SOOOO looking forward to this election.
e) Citizen's Untied
Some of the most conservative, christian, and assholish corporate jerks put their millions where their brains are. No, not up their ass. Instead, they injected huge amounts of money into election issues. Suppression of women and minority voters. Suppression of liberal votes. Attacks on every progressive idea and pol. Lies, deceit, unaccountability, and more.
Hundreds of millions of dollars. And to what end? People are actually tuning out or ignoring their crap. Despite all that money, all those ads, and so much concentrated wealth dedicated to destroying the middle class, people are not reacting to their message as they hoped (and predicted).
While we still cannot predict how the general population will vote this November, the signs are growing stronger that CU has been a financial and political disaster for the ultra-conservatives. Every million they spent is turning out to be a million wasted. I could even see corporate honchos totaling up the numbers, realizing that they squandered money to no good end, and decide to take another position. "Please, remove CU from the books! We cannot afford it anymore. Stop us from wasting so much money, you evil federal govmint!"
Now, I have to figure out how to vote early. My leaving the country for a well deserved break happens to match up with this year's election. (I even had to decline being a election judge in neighboring wisconsin for a rather progressive group.) But never fear, the Church of Ineffable Stupidity is Here! And we shall prey all the more often as the voting gets closer.