...and a canker sore on the inside of his mouth.
He also pulled a muscle while trying to snap on his sock-garters.
Additionally, the breakfast was not good.
His oatmeal had brown raisins, not the blonde ones like he likes.
And the coffee that he cannot drink for religious reasons was cold.
And there was no cantaloupe on the fruit tray.
Oh, and, he lost a zinger.
He had it when he left for the debate, but when he got out of the limo... it wasn't there.
He thinks one of the hispanic maids at the hotel may have taken it.
(That maid has been rigorously self deported... though Mr. Romney absolutely supports the Dream Act... unless it's actually called the Dream Act.)
Mr. Romney has a hangnail.
Did we mention that he's having issues with the altitude?
And that this underwear causes him to "lay left" when he "likes to lean right"?
And they didn't have his favorite gum at the gift shop and the barista at the Starbucks put too much foam on his latte and his in room TV was set to MSNBC and the trees outside his window were... really... really... really not the right height.
It is for THESE reasons, along with the train that kept him up at night... and NOT because his policies are wrong for the country and his party is extremist and because he will say anything to anyone if he thinks it would get him into the White House... that people will utterly and completely reject his performance tonight.
We just thought you should know that.
PS: Oh... and... um... thought he may not be able to debate without a full night of beauty sleep, that should not concern you about how our candidate will hold up during four mostly sleepless nights as President of The United States.