I've made a few calls. I'm giving people straight talk when I hear Romney bots speak their bullshit, but the sad fact is my mother-in-law is dying in super slo mo. It's heartbreaking to watch. I know this is taking a year, which is slow; but it feels like I just heard she had a "suspicious spot" on a scan last week.
Like so many smokers, it isn't the cancer that will kill you. It's the complications of poor circulation that comes with smoking packs upon packs, cartons after cartons of cigarettes over the course of 50+ years. Like many diabetics it's not the high or low blood sugar that kills you, but the complications of uncontrolled blood sugar blowing out the kidneys, eyesight and more compounded by a serious lack of exercise over the last 50 years. The time for recriminations, blame and emotional BS is over. Now we are dealing with the consequences of a lifetime of smoking, poor diet and no exercise.
It's not pretty. It's stressful. She's 3 1/2 hours away. It's breaking her older sister's heart. It's making my brothers-in-law and their wives say stupid things. I'm saying stupid things. The grandkids are torn between spending time with Grandma and wanting to stay away because they can't bear to see Grandma like this. I'm not sure where my MIL got the idea that her death would be swift. The reality of her health predicament is more than she can bear. She's majorly depressed, cries a lot and so is everyone else who spends any serious amount of time with her.
Grandma is a mess. She has had 3 major surgeries since the first of August. She's coming up on her maximum 150 days of inpatient care all too quickly. She can't get out of bed by herself. She can't get to a chair by herself. She can't stand for more than 10 minutes at a time. She can barely walk 50 feet. She can't go home because she lives by herself. Her sister can't lift her in and out of chairs or bed. She can't walk up steps. She has the start of a bedsore and her current facility isn't getting her to stay off her back side long enough for it to do her any good. Years and years of a lack of exercise has left her with too little muscle mass to come to her aid now. She wants to go home, but there's no way. She'll be dead in a week. We can only go up every couple of weeks to spend a few days with her, then we have to comeback to S. Florida.
My MIL thinks her sons should drop their jobs and take turns living with her until she ....until she's gone. I finally got the right paperwork signed and given to her doctors, so now I can have frank, HIPAA compliant conversations with them. Her health is far worse than what she understands it to be, but she could easily live anywhere from a few weeks to a couple years in her current state. Due to her really poor blood circulation, she could have a stoke any minute. Her kidneys could fail at any minute. She thinks she has the money to pay someone to care for her in her home, but she doesn't.
I'm. so. angry.
I'm. so. sad.
But this isn't about me, it's about her. So, I'm making do.
I'd rather be doing GOTV and getting out the vote. Instead, I'm calling doctors, hospitals and diagnostic centers out for billing for services that Medicare and her supplemental insurance already paid for in full. It's like talking to wood. I'd rather talk to a right wing-nut.
I'd like to offer rides to get people to polling places, but I'm running around like crazy taking care of our own stuff so we can get up there every other week end. The emotional toll is horrible and I'm also trying to stick to an elusive diet and work out schedule between my job and drop everything and rush to Leesburg trips. At least I'm not gaining weight.
The only thing I've been able to do is engage some elderly voters in the Leesburg area in why I think President Obama, Bill Nelson and Val Demings are the better choices for them. I've defended the ACA. Pointed out that Benghazi is not what they think it is. I've insisted a few anti-abortion single issue voters reread Exodus 22 (among a few other selections) with me. (Thank you dkos for giving me the words to say.) I've pointed out that Medicare has always been the target of Republicans and a Democratic majority will preserve the benefits they earned. I showed them Romney in his own words contradicting himself. Have I swayed anyone? Yes. Have I done enough for this campaign? Sadly, no.
We have three days to go. 3 days left. My plans for this weekend are to try and fit in some GOTV. I spent most of yesterday on the phone trying to keep a bed sore from getting worse and getting better care for my MIL. Today, I'm going to finish this diary, go work out and then do some GOTV in the late afternoon. Then I'll call my MIL and her sister, and try to be encouraging.