Last Friday, Bill Maher concluded his show with a New Rule about the decline of the white vote, and how the right-wing is dealing (or not) with it.
And finally, New Rule: I would never try to convince Fox News that black people aren't scary, but if last election you found a total of two New Black Panthers suppressing the vote by hanging around a voting booth, and this year they only had one guy, the thing being suppressed is laughter. I'm sorry, New Black Panthers, but if your entire movement gets to a restaurant, and the hostess looks at you and says she can't seat you until your whole party arrives.... (Samuel L. Jackson starts laughing uncontrollably)Video below the fold.
Wait a second... you're not that scary! Wait a second, I found another one!
(wild audience laughter as Jackson puts on angry face)
OK. Now, I bring this up because the background story of this election was white people losing their power. I mean, let's be honest. Republicans have the same problem as the Beach Boys — their fans are dying. (audience laughter)
But to the blacks, Asians, and Latinos, as your power and population grows, and mine dwindles, I'd just like to say, I'm one of the good ones! (audience laughter and applause) You know that! (kisses Samuel L. Jackson's hand) Thank you!
And I'm tired of living with the stereotype that all honkies are a little racist and retrograde and we'll only vote for fellow members of our own white tribe. You know, someone who can really rock a pair of Dockers.
Now I have long believed that if the different ethnic groups want to be treated equally, they have to stop voting for candidates just because they look like them. And yes, I'm talking about white people, like these two, who obviously have so much in common besides pigment.
But hey, the good news is Obama won. The bad news is only 39% of whites voted for him. And that is a pattern. White people vote for white people like it's going out of style. And like most things white people do, it's going out of style. (audience applause)
And it's a shame. Caucasians have accomplished so much as a race. We've given the world Ugg boots, and Cirque du Soleil, ultimate frisbee and turkey burgers, Renaissance fairs, and the golf ball washer.
But when I look at the election returns, I'm embarrassed at how far we haven't come. I cannot deny that Barack Obama is a two-term President who's had four elections in his life, and he only won the white vote once — when he ran for the Senate against another black guy.
And the only thing that makes white people more uncomfortable than choosing between two black politicians is getting the check at a Thai restaurant and trying to remember which waitress was yours. (audience howls with shocked laughter)
I tell ya, with white people, it's always one step forward, and two steps back. Or as we call it, dancing.