Last week was wretched. And I don’t mean the 7-9 record (119-72 overall) which was bad. Does no one want to get a playoff spot? The Steelers and Bengals had great chances to pretty much end the hopes of the rest of the AFC and blew it. Houston looked like sleepwalking zombies (I keep saying they can’t play a game past their bed times) and the Falcons…well, no one trusts them at all.
Meanwhile the Packers, Broncos, and Patriots are rolling. Here comes the wild finish to the season.
Cincinnati Bengals (7-6) at Philadelphia Eagles (4-9) – Defiantly Sophomores at Thanks Andy!
The Bengals need a win to keep in the playoff hunt. The Eagles are playing because they have to. The final Thursday Night game of the season is like most of the others this season – looks dreadful. The Bengals have more to play for and might have better talent too. Pick: Bengals
Indianapolis Colts (9-4) at Houston Texans (11-2) – Most Impressive at Great Expectations
The Texans looked horrid Monday Night. I feel sorry for Andrew Luck having to face a very angry team. If the Texans win then they lay claim to the division. If the Ravens win, then the Texans lay claim to a bye. The Colts could win the division if they sweep the Texans. I doubt that happens. Pick: Texans
NY Giants (8-5) at Atlanta Falcons (11-2) – The Champs at Still Not Impressed
Not sure who needs this game more: the Champs or the Falcons. The Giants have a very thin lead in their division, but the Falcons have yet to impress anyone. The Matt Ryan MVP Party has been cancelled and deposits lost. The Matt Ryan can’t win in the playoffs watch party has officially started! Pick: Giants
Minnesota Vikings (7-6) at St. Louis Rams (6-6-1) – Roaming Vandals at Still Kicking
Both teams are alive in the playoff race by the thinnest of margins. The Vikings have a QB issue and the Rams have issues with keeping players on the field. This is all about win or go home now. The Rams are a tough D and the Viking are AD and that is it. Pick: Rams
Jacksonville Jaguars (2-11) at Miami Dolphins (5-8) – Plain Awful at Better than Expected
The battle of Florida is at hand! Okay, not really, but there is not much to this game. This is all about draft position now. The Dolphins are better and should win. Pick: Dolphins
Green Bay Packers (9-4) at Chicago Bears (8-5) – Aaron’s Army at Mauled in the Midway
The Bears are tumbling and Jay has a pain in his neck. Not sure how they will recover with the Packers coming to town and looking to leave the Bears coal in their stockings instead of a division title. The Packers are getting healthy at the wrong time for the rest of the league. Pick: Packers
Washington Redskins (7-6) at Cleveland Browns (5-8) – Wonderboys at Look at This!
RG3 might play and the Skins need him to. However, a limited RG3 doesn’t scare anyone like a fully mobile one would. The Browns have a win streak going. Given the gauntlet the Skins have faced recently this game screams for Admiral Ackbar. Pick: Browns
Denver Broncos (10-3) at Baltimore Ravens (9-4) – Peyton’s Place at the Contenders
This is a major fight for playoff positioning. The Broncos sit in the 3rd seed and the Ravens the 4th. A Win by the Ravens will flip the order and give them hope for a bye. The Broncos need all kind of help even with a win. As for the game? The Ravens D has vanished and Peyton is Peyton. But the Ravens at home are formidable. Pick: Ravens
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (6-7) at New Orleans Saints (5-8) – Roving Pirates at We want Sean Back!
Done and finished is this game. The Saints will look to next season to sort out issues and to find 11 guys to play D. The Bucs will work on the strong foundation this year showed. This is a game the Saints want just to keep from a losing season. Pick: Saints
Detroit Lions (4-9) at Arizona Cardinals (4-9) – Michigan Mess at Desert Disaster!
There are bad teams, teams with bad luck, and then there are simply awful teams. The Lions have talent and no discipline. The Cardinals are awful. They want to get QBs beaten to a pulp. If I were a Cardinal QB I’d feign an injury to keep from being treated like a punching bag by the other team. Pick: Lions
Carolina Panthers (4-9) at San Diego Chargers (5-8) – Cam’s Crew at the Beach Party
Both teams are coming off of unexpected victories last week. They played spoilers to teams in the hunt. Now they can spoil each other for what exactly? Meaningless game with coaches trying to keep from being fired. I’ll take the beach bums at home. Pick: Chargers
Seattle Seahawks (8-5) at Buffalo Bills (5-8) – Russell’s Rangers at Overpriced & Overrated
Seattle needs this game to stay on the 49ers’ tail for the division. The Bills have all kinds of issues confronting them as the offseason looms. The Bills might play a good game or not show up, but the Seahawks will play hard. Pick: Seahawks
Pittsburgh Steelers (7-6) at Dallas Cowboys (7-6) – Old & Rusty at Egomaniacs
This is a potential playoff elimination game for the Cowboys. The Steelers have a chance next weekend to catch the Bengals if they lose. The Cowboys don’t win a lot at Jerry’s Palace. Here’s saying bye to the Cowboys for the 2012 season. Pick: Steelers
Kansas City Chiefs (2-11) at Oakland Raiders (3-10) – Horrible at Dreadful
Season ticket holders should demand a refund for this game. Talk about dreck! People are going to PAY to see THIS! I’m offended on their behalf. I had to write about this game so I feel their pain. Pick: Raiders
San Francisco 49ers (9-3-1) at New England Patriots (10-3) – Bay Area Brawlers at the Empire
The Sith are masters of the AFC again and will use this game to place one of the NFC’s powers under their boot. The Niners will brawl with the Sith and may even bruise them a bit, but don’t have the raw firepower that the Sith do. Pick: The Empire
NY Jets (6-7) at Tennessee Titans (4-9) - Media Hos at Bud’s Bumblers
This is the last Monday Night game of the season. Christmas Eve falls on Monday next week, so ESPN has a Saturday night game. I’m mentioning that only because this is another game of potential dreck. Depending on what happens elsewhere, the Jets could be eliminated from playoff contention. PLEASE end it! Pick: Titans