My 8th grade shop teacher couldn't conceal the booze on his breath, never mind a weapon.
We gotta stop lying to our kids about Santa. It's time to tell them the truth: that he supports gay marriage.
Sending my conservative friends their yearly gifts of nude Rush Limbaugh pin-up calendars.
Arguing on Dailykos is like taking your time and setting it on fire.
I'm way too damaged to be this awesome.
Because the world isn’t as fucked up when you’re high…that’s why.
Existence is just applied math and some of us really suck at math.
Take a chill pill? I had a friend overdose on chill pills you insensitive prick!
What do you mean you can't deliver pizza to a pillow fort?