Reading Fishgrease's latest diary reminded me of the usefulness of profanity in everyday discourse. I remembered the essay my son, soarfledgling, wrote about the subject several years ago when he was in high school. (He learned well from the old bird, obviously.) His essay is titled, as you have probably already guessed, Putting the "Fuck" Back in "Fuck Yeah!" Here it is:
The word fuck is probably the most important word in the English language. It has a way of flowing off the tongue and adding much needed flavor to a dull or run-on sentence. After doing some research, I have found that 30% of the words that come out of my mouth during the day are or involve the word fuck. I'm seriously in love with the word fuck...and why not? It is a wonderful, vibrant word rich with meaning and expression.
"I don't really care about that."
"I don't give a fuck."
Which one of those sounds better? Sentence 1 does tell it how it is, that you don't care about whatever subject you are discussing. Sentence 2 however, explodes from your mouth with a language and emotion-filled burst that leaves nothing open for discussion...you don't give a fuck. By adding the word fuck, you have given the sentence attitude, given it expression, given it life.
Fuck is also one of those interesting words that are a lot more socially acceptable than they were 30 years ago, but still offend the fuck out of christian parents, the elderly and the FCC. Everyone who doesn't regularly say fuck are very offended by its usage...especially when used in front of small children.
Now let us be clear, I like the word fuck when it is used as an empowering adjective...such as, "look at that fucking asshole." I even like the word fuck when used as a noun...such as, "look at that fuck driving the Hummer." Fuck used as a verb however, is where I start looking back to my middle school days and seeing how immature it is... "hey baby, wanna go fuck?" or, "I would so fuck that girl." I'm not sure why that usage bothers me so much (probably having something to do with how much it takes away from the beautiful act of "love making") or why I find that usage immature...I just do.
I'll leave you with this...try using the word fuck more. Just say it. Use it in everyday life and see how much happier you will feel. Tell your wife, "Honey, we're out of fucking Corn Pops." Tell your children, "No t.v. until you finish your fucking homework." Tell your boss, "I'm finishing these fucking reports as fast as humanly fucking possible...fuck." Don't say the word in anger or in a mean way, just say it. I promise you will feel a-fucking-lot better.