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Boehner is in trouble and may lose re-election because of his "Plan B" failure. The constitution does not say that the speaker of the house has to be a house member- and we all know that the speaker is the third in line for presidency.

So the Repubs can, in principle, circle the wagons and choose a bozo to replace Boehner. Then, since they will have the house, they can run 3/4 of the government (they do have the supreme court).

So let's see who will be our next president...

Will it be... (drum roll)

Clint Eastwood (82 years old). As speaker he will push through austerity measures: no tax relief if you own more than one chair (that you don't speak to) per person. When he becomes president, he will change the food stamps program so that people that get those stamps will have to eat them. (Frankly, he is probably a better choice than anyone else below.)


Rush Limbaugh (61 in human years, 102 when perscription opiates are included)  will first change the house rules so that women are not aloud to speak when CSpan is on, and democrats have to walk with a tea-party escort. When president he will block tourism from Canada so that there's no chance those bloody Canadians outstay their 6 allowed months to enjoy our snowy winters.

or ....

Rupert Murdoch (81 year old). He is eligible. He did become a citizen in 1985 so that he may be allowed to bring us the grand new innovation: the most effective way to string three lies in 5 words (Fox News, Fair and Balanced).  He will insist on every speaker starting their speech with ``Dear Honorable Sir Rupert, honorable Conservatives, and Liberal dogs''.

or ... (cheers and pigs-with-lipstick dolls waving...)
Sara Palin (48 in human years, almost seven in female dog years). She will insist that Todd will be allowed to seat by the speaker with his shotgun. When she becomes president she will instruct the army to invade Russia, but fortunately for all of us will get her direction backwards, and we will only have 3 million dead when invading Canada. Rush Limbaugh will be off his pills for a whole hour to announce that the Canadian problem is over.

or ... (win one for the Gipper shouts!)

Ronald Reagan (101 years old and fairly dead, but that hasn't stopped Boehner from being the automated speaker that he is, has it? And anyways, the speaker is controlled remotely, so its better to have a reliable dead speaker.) As speaker, Reagan will sell Alaska to China and Hawaii to Japan in return for tax benefits for Coke, GE, Walmart and Bayer (I know its a German company, but who cares anymore).  

or... (The wet dream of all wet dreams by a republican)

Anne Coulter (51 year old, 300 in BS allotment years). She will make small black dresses mandatory for all house members of both genders. She will insist that African Americans and Hispanic house members pledge in perfect New England accent that the country was promised to white man and would remain so forever. When she becomes president, she will transfer all people over 200 Lbs to Mexico in return for a beach home in Acapulco.

Now all they have to do is get their man in, and have Pat Robertson pray hard enough for the disappearance of Obama and Biden...

OK. Tongue out of cheek now. Let us hope and pray that someone in that party is still sane enough to realize that (although I disliked him) Boehner is a knowledgeable speaker made ineffective by a racist branch of the party.


So who will it be?

11%4 votes
8%3 votes
2%1 votes
5%2 votes
22%8 votes
8%3 votes
41%15 votes

| 36 votes | Vote | Results

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