None of the funds made available in this Act may be distributed to the Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (ACORN) or its subsidiaries or successors.Phew! That's a relief. God forbid a non-existent enemy of the Republican Party should be allowed to not exist without being defunded. And just in case you're skeptical about this, don't worry, it's totally normal: A spokeswoman for the appropriations committee told Huffington Post that the provision to defund the defunct group was "a typical provision that is included in most appropriations bills."
But if it really is typical to use appropriations bills to go after enemies that no longer exist, why doesn't the bill also include language defunding the Soviet Union, or the Confederacy? The answer is obvious: House Republicans are a bunch of Stalin-worshipping secessionists hell-bent on restoring the institution of slavery.
It's either that, or they're a bunch of politically obsessed idiots.